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Some of the nonsense on my journey

R

Restartatzero

Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
17
Location
Trenton Ontario Canada
Three years ago I suspected my girlfriend was cheating on me with my best friend I broke up with her and didn't talk to my friend for three months during that time I smoked myself into oblivion and lost a lot of weight I got it in my head that I was dying and then voices started on my walk to work I would hear voices arguing over something I couldn't quite catch and sometimes my x and my best friend I didn't realize at the time something was wrong with me other than the fact I was "dying"

I wanted to see my best friend again and I got it in my head he was going to save me

My friend worked in the military for my birthday we went on a three hour drive montreal to see the strippers on the way there he told me this story about a girl who trained herself to be happy by clicking something everytime something made her happy so my dumbass decide to sit straightup and be "alert" everytime his phone went off to stand tall as he would put it we spent the night at his mentors place she was a director of cisis we talked about how I wanted to join the airforce the next day I thought I was experimented on they cured my "cancer" or gave me steroids

After that I started obsessing over him thinking was using him and I wasn't his actual friend

I started thinking he was showing me images on my phone is thought everything was bad and every choice I made was bad and I was making some sort of mistake

Six months ago

started re arranging things in my room thinking I was playing chess with other worldy beings

The voices in my head were asking me if I believe in magic after I picked up an odd piece of quartz

I believe someone was trying to put a spell on me and I foiled their plan by taking the stone

I was also convinced there were two spirits fighting inside me a bear and a snake and I had to untangle them

The night I had my breakdown I thought a rabbit the devil was watching me I also saw a dragon tattoo on my forearm with a lighting bolt on my wrist

When I went to bed I couldn't sleep

I started biting my hand then slapping it away and laughing feeling euphoric and that I loved myself and that's all I would ever need just a love bite I did this all night when I got up my dad was arguing with me about how much weed I smoked four grams in a couple of hours my dad would say something and Id try to argue then he would say no listen to me in another tone of voice I thought something else was talking though him so I listened after that I lost a week of my life

I don't remember going home my nan says I kept talking a mile a minute asking her things like oh do you remember this and that I couldnt eat or dress myself or shower

Me and my dad went to the hospital everything looked so beautiful and different I didn't feel like I was in the same dimension

We walked to the hospital and they told me to walk my dog my father in there I thought I was there to help everyone I thought I was there to give up something in my soul to help other people

After that

I remember siting in my bed and watching a movie but it was different pieces of a lot of movies I must of watched I started thinking I was like the avatar and I started meditating

The next day I was by myself I think and there was light streaming in though the windows and bouncing off the ceiling creating a glimmer

The voices told me to never clothes my curtins because it lets gods light in

I thought their were fairies outside in the flowers

I thought I could eat just by breathing

I thought that I was just in a simulation

A week later I started coming too

I watched this show called watched this show called sweet tooth I started thinking the main characters story was my own and I was made of all the animals I thought I had to leave my animal side behind and become a man

I thought my aunt and Nana were the 3 fates my mother and my friend was God my father

That night I woke up out of sleep and saw a man made out of stars staring at me I got really scared

Then he came over to me and said everything is going to be alright
 
O

Orangeade

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 23, 2021
Messages
1,739
Location
England
Three years ago I suspected my girlfriend was cheating on me with my best friend I broke up with her and didn't talk to my friend for three months during that time I smoked myself into oblivion and lost a lot of weight I got it in my head that I was dying and then voices started on my walk to work I would hear voices arguing over something I couldn't quite catch and sometimes my x and my best friend I didn't realize at the time something was wrong with me other than the fact I was "dying"

I wanted to see my best friend again and I got it in my head he was going to save me

My friend worked in the military for my birthday we went on a three hour drive montreal to see the strippers on the way there he told me this story about a girl who trained herself to be happy by clicking something everytime something made her happy so my dumbass decide to sit straightup and be "alert" everytime his phone went off to stand tall as he would put it we spent the night at his mentors place she was a director of cisis we talked about how I wanted to join the airforce the next day I thought I was experimented on they cured my "cancer" or gave me steroids

After that I started obsessing over him thinking was using him and I wasn't his actual friend

I started thinking he was showing me images on my phone is thought everything was bad and every choice I made was bad and I was making some sort of mistake

Six months ago

started re arranging things in my room thinking I was playing chess with other worldy beings

The voices in my head were asking me if I believe in magic after I picked up an odd piece of quartz

I believe someone was trying to put a spell on me and I foiled their plan by taking the stone

I was also convinced there were two spirits fighting inside me a bear and a snake and I had to untangle them

The night I had my breakdown I thought a rabbit the devil was watching me I also saw a dragon tattoo on my forearm with a lighting bolt on my wrist

When I went to bed I couldn't sleep

I started biting my hand then slapping it away and laughing feeling euphoric and that I loved myself and that's all I would ever need just a love bite I did this all night when I got up my dad was arguing with me about how much weed I smoked four grams in a couple of hours my dad would say something and Id try to argue then he would say no listen to me in another tone of voice I thought something else was talking though him so I listened after that I lost a week of my life

I don't remember going home my nan says I kept talking a mile a minute asking her things like oh do you remember this and that I couldnt eat or dress myself or shower

Me and my dad went to the hospital everything looked so beautiful and different I didn't feel like I was in the same dimension

We walked to the hospital and they told me to walk my dog my father in there I thought I was there to help everyone I thought I was there to give up something in my soul to help other people

After that

I remember siting in my bed and watching a movie but it was different pieces of a lot of movies I must of watched I started thinking I was like the avatar and I started meditating

The next day I was by myself I think and there was light streaming in though the windows and bouncing off the ceiling creating a glimmer

The voices told me to never clothes my curtins because it lets gods light in

I thought their were fairies outside in the flowers

I thought I could eat just by breathing

I thought that I was just in a simulation

A week later I started coming too

I watched this show called watched this show called sweet tooth I started thinking the main characters story was my own and I was made of all the animals I thought I had to leave my animal side behind and become a man

I thought my aunt and Nana were the 3 fates my mother and my friend was God my father

That night I woke up out of sleep and saw a man made out of stars staring at me I got really scared

Then he came over to me and said everything is going to be alright
Thank you for sharing your journey x
 
D

danmarkok89

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 14, 2021
Messages
407
Location
Norwich
Three years ago I suspected my girlfriend was cheating on me with my best friend I broke up with her and didn't talk to my friend for three months during that time I smoked myself into oblivion and lost a lot of weight I got it in my head that I was dying and then voices started on my walk to work I would hear voices arguing over something I couldn't quite catch and sometimes my x and my best friend I didn't realize at the time something was wrong with me other than the fact I was "dying"

I wanted to see my best friend again and I got it in my head he was going to save me

My friend worked in the military for my birthday we went on a three hour drive montreal to see the strippers on the way there he told me this story about a girl who trained herself to be happy by clicking something everytime something made her happy so my dumbass decide to sit straightup and be "alert" everytime his phone went off to stand tall as he would put it we spent the night at his mentors place she was a director of cisis we talked about how I wanted to join the airforce the next day I thought I was experimented on they cured my "cancer" or gave me steroids

After that I started obsessing over him thinking was using him and I wasn't his actual friend

I started thinking he was showing me images on my phone is thought everything was bad and every choice I made was bad and I was making some sort of mistake

Six months ago

started re arranging things in my room thinking I was playing chess with other worldy beings

The voices in my head were asking me if I believe in magic after I picked up an odd piece of quartz

I believe someone was trying to put a spell on me and I foiled their plan by taking the stone

I was also convinced there were two spirits fighting inside me a bear and a snake and I had to untangle them

The night I had my breakdown I thought a rabbit the devil was watching me I also saw a dragon tattoo on my forearm with a lighting bolt on my wrist

When I went to bed I couldn't sleep

I started biting my hand then slapping it away and laughing feeling euphoric and that I loved myself and that's all I would ever need just a love bite I did this all night when I got up my dad was arguing with me about how much weed I smoked four grams in a couple of hours my dad would say something and Id try to argue then he would say no listen to me in another tone of voice I thought something else was talking though him so I listened after that I lost a week of my life

I don't remember going home my nan says I kept talking a mile a minute asking her things like oh do you remember this and that I couldnt eat or dress myself or shower

Me and my dad went to the hospital everything looked so beautiful and different I didn't feel like I was in the same dimension

We walked to the hospital and they told me to walk my dog my father in there I thought I was there to help everyone I thought I was there to give up something in my soul to help other people

After that

I remember siting in my bed and watching a movie but it was different pieces of a lot of movies I must of watched I started thinking I was like the avatar and I started meditating

The next day I was by myself I think and there was light streaming in though the windows and bouncing off the ceiling creating a glimmer

The voices told me to never clothes my curtins because it lets gods light in

I thought their were fairies outside in the flowers

I thought I could eat just by breathing

I thought that I was just in a simulation

A week later I started coming too

I watched this show called watched this show called sweet tooth I started thinking the main characters story was my own and I was made of all the animals I thought I had to leave my animal side behind and become a man

I thought my aunt and Nana were the 3 fates my mother and my friend was God my father

That night I woke up out of sleep and saw a man made out of stars staring at me I got really scared

Then he came over to me and said everything is going to be alright
sounds like you've been on one hell of an adventure! I once had a similar experience where I had a really profound experience where God appeared and where afterwards I thought everything was going to be ok, I wonder how common that is? I hope you're ok now though, maybe there was some truth to your experience somehow?
 
R

Restartatzero

Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
17
Location
Trenton Ontario Canada
I'm doing well now for awhile I was all gody till I realized I could be my own person and not have to worship anyone
 
morpheus01

morpheus01

formerly ht46
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
5,093
Location
Pluto
That sounds like an intense experience, I kind of relate in someways, when I was psychotic I thought there were two sensei's teaching me kung fu in my head it was quite silly but similar to your experience it being two things in your head, I didn't think I had a spell on me but I thought I was possessed, I had religious experiences as well I hallucinated these triangles and they gave me a sense of pure evil and I wanted to go to church.

Maybe we're tapping into some dimension or realm.

Glad you're recovering.
 
R

Restartatzero

Member
Joined
Jan 1, 2022
Messages
17
Location
Trenton Ontario Canada
That sounds like an intense experience, I kind of relate in someways, when I was psychotic I thought there were two sensei's teaching me kung fu in my head it was quite silly but similar to your experience it being two things in your head, I didn't think I had a spell on me but I thought I was possessed, I had religious experiences as well I hallucinated these triangles and they gave me a sense of pure evil and I wanted to go to church.

Maybe we're tapping into some dimension or realm.

Glad you're recovering.
Yeah who knows I saw a white Samurai in the distance also taking the shape of an owl idrk what i think about it
 
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