Soldier in need of help

[ke35096]

never thought that I would be in this situation where I have to get online to ask this…. But…. Well here I am.

Im 21 years old, US ARMY and im in Iraq for the second time. After my last time in iraqI started dating a woman, let’s call her Nina.
When I met Nina we had some of the best times in our life, for months, I was so happy. until I found out everything that she had told me was a lie. I found out she was married. After I packed up and left she pulled the whole I was confused bit. She told me that she was putting in the devoice work. come to find out she lied about that too. After a few weeks of back and forth of her telling me she left him and then i find out diffrently. I left and she showed up at my door a few weeks later with the devoice papers in hand.

Well I took her back…. Big mistake. The lies even about the most pointless things in the world continued, and got worse. And it pushed me so far away that I left her again. And she didn’t seem to care until I started talking with another woman. She came to me tearful and begging me to came back And damnit I love her and I went back. And the lies did get better…. She did cut it almost to a complete halt. But…. With now her divorced and she knows that the 1 more lie and I’m out the door, that’s when the mental abuse started. well….. it got worse, Now im very patent when I comes to this kind of thing but it once again pushed me past my mark. And I left again…

Once again she didn’t seem to care until she found out I was with another woman. She begs a pleads that she is going to change. And I do love her….. but I don’t know if I can handle the stress of her any more. And to be honest I feel like I lost my chance with much better girls for choosing her.

And on top of this during the cores of our year long relationship she has had 2 acts of infidelity, and talking to hubby behind my back until I put a stop to that. I guess you could say that I was unfaithful also with the two girls that I was with when I left her.

Now I will give a little background on her. I do know that one of her ex’s was extremely abusive. Physically and mentally. I know that her parents were not the best in the world and I that lil radar in my head thinks a history of sexual abuse also. That’s one part of why I have kept working with her. I have never even yelled at this girl, and the only time she has ever seen me violent is when someone almost hit my new truck .

I do know that she has the capacity in her to change, ive seen it with my own eyes. But with me now in a warzone, the stress is more of a burden than before. I can’t trust her, I worry about what she tells me. I also worry about what she does while I’m away. I have a very strong hunch the she has cheated on me again.

What am I to do…… do I try and work with her at the risk of my sanity, or just let this one go?

 

[ke35096]

I guess while im waiting I can give a little background on myself. I grew up with an alkey of a mother, and all my father figures have been drug dealers. I left that lifestyle in search of something better. At age 15 I left and lived on the streets for a bit, and then finally got taken into the child services and wound up with an outstanding foster family. That pushed me over the limit in search of something better.

I took my ged at age 16 and passed with a 3600 and was offered a scholarship for one year. I wound up joining the army at 18 for the money to continue school. I did have a little difficulty adjusting to the lifestyle at first. ( the wake up the most ). But currently as Im writing this my sergeants talk nothing but praise of me. I also here from friends, and my superiors on how resoundingly resilient I am. There is not much that can get me down I always seem to find the bright side of things no matter how bad they are.

 

[Gail]

With reference to your PM to me with the heading "seen you where online" You dont know me, so dont PM me. Saying I really need some advice on this then including a link to this post is not going to make me reply. If I read a post then wish to reply to it I will, I dont need a PM to make me do so. I guard my privacy and getting a PM from someone like this who doest know me and whos only just joined is not going to get an answer. Good luck with your post and I hope you get the advice you want

 

[ke35096]

With reference to your PM to me with the heading "seen you where online" You dont know me, so dont PM me. Saying I really need some advice on this then including a link to this post is not going to make me reply. If I read a post then wish to reply to it I will, I dont need a PM to make me do so. I guard my privacy and getting a PM from someone like this who doest know me and whos only just joined is not going to get an answer. Good luck with your post and I hope you get the advice you want

I do apologize for the trespass... it just that I was about to get off work and I do not have internet in my room.... im feeling kind of low and just needed some advice... and I am sorry to offend you