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Social issues. Anyone else ?

M

ManDss

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Social issues. Anyone else ?

My big struggle in the past have been social issues. Started since young, etc, etc.

The problem now is that I dont like people. I dont have problems like talking, keeping conversations, or being with people, etc.

I have to admit that Im a strange person.

People seem to "follow a line", like if all "talk the same language", I mean... they behave in a way I dont behave. The jokes they make... the way they express... how they talk... etc... its not the way I do.

Being frank, I feel quite nerveous around people. Ive deal with some social anxiety, but nothing too big. Its just Ive never been "normal", Im always "the strage one". Its long to talk about but it has been like that.

Just by seeing people I feel a strange feeling. It doesnt happen with everyone, all the time, and its not something that "paralizes" me. Its just a strange feeling.

I feel smarter than everyone.

And I am extremely polite. I talk slow, paused.

Anyway, the thng is that I feel between people and me there is a giant gap. They are strange to me, and I am strange to them.

In informal social meetings I feel I have to act, and follow the way they behave, its like "I dont like you, but Im here, so Im just gonna follow they way you all act to fit". Never find people I like, its always me having to adapt to them.

Say "people" is just a generalization, people isnt all the same, bla bla. Im not looking for advices.

Does anyone have problems like this ?
 
J

justabloke

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Kind of. I prefer not to be around people much of the time. I feel I am separate and different from most people I meet because they all have easy social skills and seem to want to be around each other. For me, it feels quite the burden to be around other people, and also I am never really certain of what they want. People seem to have motives behind even at-the-time seemingly innocuous conversations and questions.

I'd rather be by myself most of the time in the first place, and more-so because I don't know what people want, and how what they want aligns with my need to keep out of their stress and drama.
 
K

Keesha

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I’m an introvert so prefer my own company. Large crowds really overwhelm me. It’s not that I don’t like people and certainly don’t feel smarter or superior.
It’s that I feel so different, I don’t feel like I belong to the human species. Somehow I relate to animals and nature more than humans.

Plus because I’m so unsure of others, I over analyze them and my surroundings. It’s a horrible habit but it’s an automatic one that I don’t actually even think about. I just do it.

Yeah. I often make others uncomfortable
:shove:
 
SoftRain

SoftRain

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I always feel different too. I like my own company. I like most people and learn to tolerate others. I try to socialize in groups sometimes but I feel uncomfortable most times. I feel like I’m being judged and I hate that.
 
jajingna

jajingna

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I get the impression sometimes that lots of people believe they are different or weird, but really are pretty average and normal.
 
S

SadRainbow

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I'm fairly introverted and in the past tended to prefer my own company but with this current depression I feel really lonely for some reason and I often prefer being with other people. I feel a lot of gratitude when people actually want to spend time with me. I've never really struggled with small talk and making friends and while sometimes I feel separate from everyone and everything it's not because I think I'm weird or special.
 
T

TheLastGirlScout

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Introvert here. I seriously suck at small talk. When I have to interact with people I find myself cutting right to the core of things and saying too much or making a weird joke that only I get. In 51 years there have been a hand full of times that a connection with someone is made, but usually people don't get me. Lately I've been trying to really focus on boundaries and being mindful of how I interact. But of course that just leads to me being hyper-aware and anxious.

I joined the site today specifically for this reason. To connect with others from the safety of my own room. However, there is some satisfaction in not fitting in all the time.
 
Shayna

Shayna

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Sep 27, 2021
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USA
Social issues. Anyone else ?

My big struggle in the past have been social issues. Started since young, etc, etc.

The problem now is that I dont like people. I dont have problems like talking, keeping conversations, or being with people, etc.

I have to admit that Im a strange person.

People seem to "follow a line", like if all "talk the same language", I mean... they behave in a way I dont behave. The jokes they make... the way they express... how they talk... etc... its not the way I do.

Being frank, I feel quite nerveous around people. Ive deal with some social anxiety, but nothing too big. Its just Ive never been "normal", Im always "the strage one". Its long to talk about but it has been like that.

Just by seeing people I feel a strange feeling. It doesnt happen with everyone, all the time, and its not something that "paralizes" me. Its just a strange feeling.

I feel smarter than everyone.

And I am extremely polite. I talk slow, paused.

Anyway, the thng is that I feel between people and me there is a giant gap. They are strange to me, and I am strange to them.

In informal social meetings I feel I have to act, and follow the way they behave, its like "I dont like you, but Im here, so Im just gonna follow they way you all act to fit". Never find people I like, its always me having to adapt to them.

Say "people" is just a generalization, people isnt all the same, bla bla. Im not looking for advices.

Does anyone have problems like this ?
I have the same problem as you. I don't feel smarter than everyone else, I just don't feel like I don't fit in ever. My dry sense of humor doesn't fit in with them. Since covid, everyone else now knows what it feels like to social distanced from other people. I have been like this for years now.
 
euhidajat9919

euhidajat9919

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Indonesia
I have problem in communicating, it might be considered social issues I guess. I am nervous whilst I am in large group, sometimes ended up shutting my brain down...hence I don't talk at all after that. I am even nervous around my own family for starter because they have been good at socialising unlike me. I don't dislike people though because if they haven't said anything to me, they are just like blank pages for me (they have not hurt me or relating to me). Well, I also never feel fit in where I am right now, my own country.
 
A

Alexander Ypsilantis

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There is a condition called Asperger's Syndrome which denotes lack of social skills in some people. They want to be close to others, but they don't know how to make it work. Asperger's impacted people are described as being 'Not content to be alone all the time, they long to form friendships (as they understand them) with others. Unfortunately, they have very little idea how to make friendship work. Their approach is awkward and one-sided, and reflects a lack of understanding that the other person in the exchange has needs and wishes that have to be taken into account, too. Because they cannot read social or emotional cues well, they come off as insensitive, pushy, or strange, yet have very little insight into how they are perceived.'
 
M

ManDss

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Location
Argentina
There is a condition called Asperger's Syndrome which denotes lack of social skills in some people. They want to be close to others, but they don't know how to make it work. Asperger's impacted people are described as being 'Not content to be alone all the time, they long to form friendships (as they understand them) with others. Unfortunately, they have very little idea how to make friendship work. Their approach is awkward and one-sided, and reflects a lack of understanding that the other person in the exchange has needs and wishes that have to be taken into account, too. Because they cannot read social or emotional cues well, they come off as insensitive, pushy, or strange, yet have very little insight into how they are perceived.'
Ive read some things about Asperger, but I came to the conclusion that to really understand what Asperger is about I need to see a person with Asperger, and see how behaves. Just by reading words I could think "oh, this means this...", but cant be sure if it really is like that.

Time ago I watched a Netflix serie called "Love on the spectum", that follows young adults with Autism, and the persons with Asperger not only show some "little troubles" to relate with people, they show major problems, almost to the limit to have inteligence deficience. So... I dont know.
 
stevie_sloth

stevie_sloth

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There are quite a few Youtube videos from people on the spectrum, from Aspergers to Autism. It manifests in SO many different ways.
 
Bod

Bod

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Put a camera in my hands and I feel very confident and can talk very easily, take the camera away and in groups which I hate I am very nervous and can't talk or even strike up a conversation so it is like I am just standing in a room on my own even if outside.
 
stevie_sloth

stevie_sloth

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Put a camera in my hands and I feel very confident and can talk very easily, take the camera away and in groups which I hate I am very nervous and can't talk or even strike up a conversation so it is like I am just standing in a room on my own even if outside.
That's really interesting. I'm similar. I used to film videos of just me talking to the camera. Then I'd send them to my friend in the USA to watch. It was the only time I was able to talk easily without stuttering.
 
Bod

Bod

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That's really interesting. I'm similar. I used to film videos of just me talking to the camera. Then I'd send them to my friend in the USA to watch. It was the only time I was able to talk easily without stuttering.

Small world again there then.
 
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