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Social anxiety?

C

Catb

New member
Joined
Mar 23, 2019
Messages
3
Location
UK
Having first experienced anxiety 5 years ago, I always think it went away and comes back now and again. The truth is that at times I have forgotten that I even have anxiety and I feel so lucky to be able to say that. But when I really think about it, since I first started experiencing my worst symptoms, I don’t think I’ve ever really been the same person. The general anxiety I experience now is in fact much worse than the anxiety I experienced when I first suffered with it, not by severity of the anxiety itself but of the amount of situations I now find myself unable to cope with. I now find it almost impossible to go out socially unless it is with people I know very very well. I avoid most social situations, I don’t drink alcohol because I don’t like not feeling in control and because during my worst months with anxiety I was unable to eat or keep anything down so with 1 drink of alcohol I would vomit. At the moment I live in a bubble where I tell myself and other people that the reason I’m not sociable is because I’m very busy with work (true) and I’m trying to save money (only half true). The main reason is that the mere thought of going anywhere where I might have to interact with people I don’t know is so exhausting that I just can’t face having to do it for real. Whenever my boyfriend invites me anywhere I’m stuck in a constant battle of wanting to go because we never go out together and not wanting to go because the thought makes me so anxious. I don’t know his friends from work very well because I get so anxious of what they think of me that I always avoid being in a situation where we need to interact. This is now becoming a problem as it’s been so long now that it’s even stranger that I don’t know them (very small workplace) and I always say I’ll come and then flake. He doesn’t understand my anxiety despite telling me he takes it seriously. I also can’t go anywhere unless I’m with the person I’m meeting or they meet me beforehand. I cannot physically go somewhere to meet someone if they aren’t there first and they need to meet me outside because I cannot go in alone. I don’t know if I’m being dramatic with this or if it is possible to feel so normal yet struggle with the thought of having to actually socialise with other people? I don’t know if this is linked to my previous anxiety issues or if this is just me being silly.
 
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Yodagirl

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 9, 2019
Messages
626
Location
Georgia USA
Having first experienced anxiety 5 years ago, I always think it went away and comes back now and again. The truth is that at times I have forgotten that I even have anxiety and I feel so lucky to be able to say that. But when I really think about it, since I first started experiencing my worst symptoms, I don’t think I’ve ever really been the same person. The general anxiety I experience now is in fact much worse than the anxiety I experienced when I first suffered with it, not by severity of the anxiety itself but of the amount of situations I now find myself unable to cope with. I now find it almost impossible to go out socially unless it is with people I know very very well. I avoid most social situations, I don’t drink alcohol because I don’t like not feeling in control and because during my worst months with anxiety I was unable to eat or keep anything down so with 1 drink of alcohol I would vomit. At the moment I live in a bubble where I tell myself and other people that the reason I’m not sociable is because I’m very busy with work (true) and I’m trying to save money (only half true). The main reason is that the mere thought of going anywhere where I might have to interact with people I don’t know is so exhausting that I just can’t face having to do it for real. Whenever my boyfriend invites me anywhere I’m stuck in a constant battle of wanting to go because we never go out together and not wanting to go because the thought makes me so anxious. I don’t know his friends from work very well because I get so anxious of what they think of me that I always avoid being in a situation where we need to interact. This is now becoming a problem as it’s been so long now that it’s even stranger that I don’t know them (very small workplace) and I always say I’ll come and then flake. He doesn’t understand my anxiety despite telling me he takes it seriously. I also can’t go anywhere unless I’m with the person I’m meeting or they meet me beforehand. I cannot physically go somewhere to meet someone if they aren’t there first and they need to meet me outside because I cannot go in alone. I don’t know if I’m being dramatic with this or if it is possible to feel so normal yet struggle with the thought of having to actually socialise with other people? I don’t know if this is linked to my previous anxiety issues or if this is just me being silly.
Hello and welcome! I’m sorry you’re dealing with this anxiety currently. I too suffer with horrible anxiety I literally felt like I worried about everything under the sun. I’ve been like this for as long as I can recall. I was recently also diagnosed with Bipolar type 1 and was put on a mood stabilizer (lamotrigine) as well as Anxiety medicine (Buspar) I don’t know if it’s the combination of the two but I’ve never felt better! And I’ve had some really dark bad times. I even avoided my own family the anxiety was so bad. Are you currently seeing your GP or a psychiatrist for these issues? I hope things get better for you. I’m here if you need to chat.
 
C

Catb

New member
Joined
Mar 23, 2019
Messages
3
Location
UK
Hello and welcome! I’m sorry you’re dealing with this anxiety currently. I too suffer with horrible anxiety I literally felt like I worried about everything under the sun. I’ve been like this for as long as I can recall. I was recently also diagnosed with Bipolar type 1 and was put on a mood stabilizer (lamotrigine) as well as Anxiety medicine (Buspar) I don’t know if it’s the combination of the two but I’ve never felt better! And I’ve had some really dark bad times. I even avoided my own family the anxiety was so bad. Are you currently seeing your GP or a psychiatrist for these issues? I hope things get better for you. I’m here if you need to chat.
Thank you for replying. I haven’t seen my doctor since I was initially diagnosed with anxiety 5 years ago. Once the initial overwhelming anxiety I was experiencing got better on medication I actually weaned myself off it and coped a lot better for a while but I’ve had ups and downs since then but I have just kept it to myself and it’s really started to affect my relationship over the past 2 years. I have many times considered going back to my doctor when I’ve felt I can’t cope anymore which is mainly when I’m having an anxious episode but once I finally manage to feel almost normal again I just feel like I’m being dramatic and I’m scared that if I go to my doctor and explain they’ll tell me that I’m being silly.
 
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Yodagirl

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 9, 2019
Messages
626
Location
Georgia USA
I would definitely recommend seeing your GP and explain what your going through to him/her. For years I would take medicine for my depression and anxiety and then when I felt better I would tell myself I didn’t need the medicine. I would always end up feeling worse and needing meds again. You should never feel ashamed to ask for help and take medicine or therapy to help.
 
Mdeey

Mdeey

Member
Joined
Aug 3, 2018
Messages
9
Location
NL
My story is very similar. About 5 years in, ups&downs, moments where I thought it was gone, have I ever been the same as before though?

First of all, you're not being dramatic or silly. Anything you experience is serious..
Also, you should know that in addition to having an anxiety disorder, many people will develop agoraphobia (fear of (social) situations with an unsafe environment or no way to escape). Because you're afraid a panic attack might occur.
This also happened to me.

If you haven't seen your GP in 5 years, you should. If only to just talk about your feelings. What kind of medication did you use before?
Im not in favour of taking medication. Especially SSRI's (antidepressants) and benzodiazepines. They can have negative side-effects and be abused. And after all, do you want to feel normal and enjoy situations, or just trick your mind.
Medication like that, in my opinion, should only be used to support treatment, such as exposure therapy.
 
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