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Social Anxiety at Work

M

Mav2126

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Joined
Mar 14, 2021
Messages
101
Location
New York
Hi Everyone - I have been working now for 2 months. Everyone is very nice to me. But I felt so scared today when everyone was talking and laughing together. I felt so disconnected from them. It made me sad that I couldn't join in their conversation.
 
miss_sensitivity

miss_sensitivity

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May 12, 2021
Messages
336
Location
New Zealand
This is such a common feeling that I have. And once these thoughts kick in, I find it even harder to connect in. For me I think part of the issue is being too much in my own head.
My partner always says to me that all that matters is being kind. We don't have to be the most talkative, the funniest or the loudest. I think part of that includes being kind to yourself.
I wish I could tell you something that would take that sad feeling away because I know how it feels. Remember though, two months isn't a hugely long time either, sometimes it can take time to form those solid bonds and connections. I hope you feel better
 
2

2Much2Feel

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Apr 24, 2021
Messages
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True true, what miss_sensitivity is saying! Two months isn't that long, although it can feel like an eternity when you first start a job. I've found that the jobs I stay with even when I think I can't tend to get better over time. Over time, people respect you for being there, sticking with it, and are willing to "invest" more in your as a person once they get used to the idea that you are not moving on or temporary. I swear this has been true almost every single time. Hang in there, and good for you for doing so whilst experiencing this anxiety! I do believe that most of society can relate to what you're saying, though. Starting a new job is my LEAST favourite thing to do, not easy, but the hardest part is over. :)
 
M

Mav2126

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Joined
Mar 14, 2021
Messages
101
Location
New York
Thank you miss sensitivity and 2much2feel. I really appreciate your kind and understanding words. It does help. :)
 
S

Shay94

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Apr 10, 2020
Messages
478
Location
Balga. Perth
I agree, 2 months isn't that long of being in a new job. Social anxiety sucks, I felt the same way when I started mine in Oct last year. I didn't really speak much coz my head kept playing up & wondering how the boss/other employees would see me, also the fact I hadn't done this job in 6 years so was extremely nervous getting back into it. Wasn't on meds when I started but had been at my previous job as work became so incredibly toxic & was no longer able to cope without it. All I can say is just give it a chance at this one, takes time to form relationships/bonds with new people you work with. You don't have to be so positive etc 24/7 but just be kind to them & you'll form a bond with them in time :)
 
M

Mav2126

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Joined
Mar 14, 2021
Messages
101
Location
New York
Thanks so much everyone for your support. I want to report back that I had a great day today. I felt connected to people and was able to laugh with them and joke around. So at least that is one good day on the books.
 
2

2Much2Feel

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Apr 24, 2021
Messages
1,196
Location
US
Thanks so much everyone for your support. I want to report back that I had a great day today. I felt connected to people and was able to laugh with them and joke around. So at least that is one good day on the books.
Mav2126, that is awesome news!!! Good job hanging in there. You'll likely be v glad you did. I felt SO out of place and lost at a job that turned out to be the best job I ever had, just took a bit. People just gradually let you in. Well done :)
 
miss_sensitivity

miss_sensitivity

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Joined
May 12, 2021
Messages
336
Location
New Zealand
Thanks so much everyone for your support. I want to report back that I had a great day today. I felt connected to people and was able to laugh with them and joke around. So at least that is one good day on the books.
That's awesome to hear! Sometimes it can feel so much easier to just run away or hide so you should feel so proud of yourself for pushing through :D
 
TooMuchPain

TooMuchPain

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Feb 6, 2019
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682
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\_(ツ)_/
I’m glad you had a good day. It’s important to be happy at work.
 
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