So Unhappy (Psychosis - Not drug induced!)

[Angel Feather]

I have been diagnosed with psychosis.... I had episodes when I was 17 and then again when I was 19 and got seriously ill when I was 21 ( worse than I was before).... Its not until 21 I went to a doctor... I didnt know there was anything wrong with me until then... I just talk everything I saw at face value.... i know that sounds mad... believing everything you see ( i now that now)

I'm just really unhappy that I had to go through traumatic stuff...and end up being really ill..

Does anyone else have psychosis thats not been drug induced?

mines probably in my genes because my cousin was schizophrenic... Yeah i know how can you take everything you see for granted when Your cousins schizophrenic... I haven't told any of my friends that I've been ill even though some of them must of guessed... Its not like I have many friends ( I'm sort of socially anxious)

This forums like a godsend..... I had no one to talk to .. then google comes up with this.... I dont know if it'll be any help but its worth a shot right?

Im just really unhappy and I dont know why.... i dont know if its linked to this illness or not but I dont know what to do to make myself happy....

Is anyone else having this problem?

xxX Angel Feather Xxx

 

[schizolanza]

Hi Angel. to the forum.
I suffer with schizophrenia and depression.Your post reminds me of myself.
I dont really have many prospects in life at the moment.I know I'm unhappy.I'm not working yet dont know what job would be right for me even if I could get one.
I think we all need goals in life.Something to aim for.

 

[Rambuie Perspecador]

Hi Angel
In my attempt to be a comfort to you, might I suggest that if you view what is happening to you as something that has been narrowed down to an excessive dopamine flow that bombards the receptors in your brain - in other words, a 'chemical imbalance' in the brain that affects the way in which a person might interpret what the senses are picking up in terms of what we see, what we taste - sometimes, what we hear - and that you have this in common with a huge number of people in the world, AND then if you reflect that as human organisms and people we can no more expect that there will be nothing ever go wrong with brain activity than we can guarantee never to have a broken leg! - not much comfort, I know, but at least a medication that helps to better regulate this dopamine flow would bring some relief and restore some stability in what is a chaotic and thoroughly confusing experience.

Apologies for my never-ending sentences. Never-ending sentence is my experience of schizophrenia. The rest is best described as acclimatisation and coming to terms with what life deals us. The indomitable human spirit is what fuels this for many of us. Here is my hope and prayer that you can keep up your spirits to see through whatever life throws at you, too.

 

[Danage]

I got psychosis due to stress and not by drugs (I have never taken drugs (apart from medicines, of course), and the only thing I have ever smoked is seaweed (yes, you read that right).

I kind of like the idea that psychosis is dreaming while you are awake, rather than anything else, because it sounds accurate to me.

 

[Rambuie Perspecador]

Disordered sleep must surely play some part in it. I had practically turned night into day, through not living neatly in a 24-hour cycle for months - before my admission to hospital, with alarming and dis-orientating hallucinations and terrors. Dream-states and otherness-absences while awake were strong features of those times. Any corresponding corroborations for that?

 

[IDream]

I kind of like the idea that psychosis is dreaming while you are awake, rather than anything else, because it sounds accurate to me.

I'd tend to agree with this.

Im reading Jung's theory on dreams, and I wonder whether this theory can be extended to psychoses.

His theory is that it is the subconscious talking - a psychosis is a bit more like a nightmare I guess.
Is it our subconscious talking? Maybe.
He talks about dreams "compensating" for our psyche - if we have distroted views of ourselves - do our "dreams" compensate by showing us the opposite of what we think of ourselves.
Often people with schizophrenia-like illnesses have distorted views of themselves- does our psychosis try to tell us something?
Tell us that are views are distorted?

During my last psychosis, I remember sitting in the sun staring at the trees - I never felt so close to god. Yet, Ive be an atheist for years - maybe it was my subconscious telling me to believe more in the "mystery" of life.
I tend to take that view more when I consider things, and maybe that has balanced my view of things more.
Ive not had a psychosis in nearly 3 years now - here's hoping.

 

[portree]

During my last psychosis, I remember sitting in the sun staring at the trees - I never felt so close to god. Yet, Ive be an atheist for years - maybe it was my subconscious telling me to believe more in the "mystery" of life.

Wow, that rings bells for me. Can't really say more about it now, but it rings bells.