So I think maybe I have a Personality Disorder.

[Amplifier]

Pretty much.

I've always avoided trying to diagnose myself with any sort of actual disorder, maybe I thought it was like trying to excuse my shortcomings or something, but lately I'm not sure what to think.

I'm not an expert on personality disorders, but I've done a bit of reading around and sort of wondered if the following may apply to me:

Paranoid personality disorder, Borderline personality disorder, Avoidant personality disorder, Delusional disorder or (and this one is more of a stretch, maybe) Schizophrenia.

So I guess I should list some symptoms or something. Since approximately November 2008 I've been experiencing increased sensitivity to insults or what I perceive as such, paranoia over social situations and the opinions of people around me, a lack of motivation, lack of enjoyment from activities which I once found pleasurable, low self-esteem, body image issues which recently hit their low point with gender identity concerns, feelings of inferiority, mistrust of people, self-imposed isolation, feelings of victimization, mild auditory hallucinations in the form of a loud ringing in my ears which has only recently manifested (this may be unrelated, but I'll throw it in to be sure) a tenuous grasp on reality or what is necessary to function in the real world and subsequent escapism via fantasy and substance abuse.

I feel I may have written this as a way of trying to decide myself wether or not I really have a disorder, but I'm still unsure. Obviously, the best course of action is to consult with a professional, which I am in the process of organising after a meeting with my doctor, but I'd like some confirmation on my anxieties beforehand.

So, am I overreacting? There's no question in my mind that I have some issues to work out, but is it too early for me to be worrying about personality disorders? Share your thoughts.

Thanks.

 

[Ainsworth]

hello

you say the symptons started (roundabout) November 08, what happened around that time, did you experience some type of trauma or something?

you are also saying you are using drugs of some type, they probably wont dx you if your using because they have to exclude the drugs being the reason for your change in behaviour.

mostly PDs can be caused by childhood trauma but its can also happen from other things affecting us and usually the signs are there even though we seem to function quite well.

maybe if you can look at what you were like before Nov 08 and what could of caused your personality to change.

good luck with the doctors but remember if you do have a disorder of some type, combo therapy is the best way forward.

 

[Amplifier]

November 08 is when my father first fell ill as a result of lung cancer. He died about a year later. I suppose I should have mentioned this.

I used to do cannabis, but that habit started October 09 after the onset of symptoms and I have since quit.

Thanks for your support, I've been recommended to the Child and Adolescent Mental Health Assosciation so I suppose we'll have to see where it goes from there.