so depressed had enough

A

amy100

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2015
Messages
15
#1
I was meant to go on holiday this week but I was so depressed/couldn't get out of bed/couldn't face seeing anyone or speaking to anyone. so I had to cancel it and wasted a load of money.
I just hate this life.
I have zero friends, no family, no one cares, I even emailed my shrink recently saying I was suicidal and she ignored me.
everyone hates me. this is self pitty but its true. I have tried for the last 15 years, and it never gets any better.
 
pinscher chi

pinscher chi

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Mar 16, 2019
Messages
153
Location
Indiana, USA
#2
Hi. That is terrible that your shrink ignored your email. Maybe she didn't receive it? Are you feeling suicidal right now?
 
A

amy100

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2015
Messages
15
#3
she just rung me (left message, I didn't answer), saying she was ringing to see how things were. well its been a week, so she cant care that much. even if she did, it wouldn't be enough. - if the only person in the world that cared was your doctor, that doesn't count. stupid.
I have been but nothing seems to work out, and I defo dont want to end up in the looney bin.
 
I

iWILLOBTAINMENTALHEALTH2

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 6, 2019
Messages
690
#4
I'm sorry you are going through this. Family issues are horrible and difficult to deal with. I hope you can find the strength to go out and make friends. I made a great friend by going to support and recovery groups. Maybe see if there are any in your area. If I can do it, anyone can do it. Plus I've always had my awesome sister. What happened with your family? If you don't mind me asking. If you are still suicidal please call the Suicide Prevention Hotline or go to your nearest emergency room now! You deserve to live and enjoy your life. Suicide is a waste of a precious life that can be fulfilling. If you commit suicide who knows what beauty you could miss out on. Please hang on. You don't deserve to die. I would also go to a therapist and a psychiatrist too. I care. I hope you get better. :hug:
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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England
#5
Hi Amy,
Please don't give up, what treatments have you tried?
Do you have a crisis team that you can contact?
Hope you feel better very soon.
We care here.
Take care
 
A

amy100

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2015
Messages
15
#6
thanks but its not like that, I have tried, I have seen doctors, and 10 therapists and gone to support groups- I met people but then they ended up harrassing me and threatening me because they were all more crazy then I was. I met other people but none of them have tlked to me for like a year.
there is no beauty to miss out on. as I said its been like this for 15 years, nothing ever gets better, I still feel as I did back then, despite everything I have done to make an effort. I cant do anymore
 
pinscher chi

pinscher chi

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 16, 2019
Messages
153
Location
Indiana, USA
#7
thanks but its not like that, I have tried, I have seen doctors, and 10 therapists and gone to support groups- I met people but then they ended up harrassing me and threatening me because they were all more crazy then I was. I met other people but none of them have tlked to me for like a year.
there is no beauty to miss out on. as I said its been like this for 15 years, nothing ever gets better, I still feel as I did back then, despite everything I have done to make an effort. I cant do anymore
are you taking any medication for depression?
do you have anyone at all you feel you can talk to about how you feel?
if you feel your therapist doesn't care about you and ignores you, please look into finding another therapist who will take you seriously!
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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9,380
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#8
Hi Amy,
I'm sorry your feeling so low right now, sounds like you need one-to-one longer term counselling.
Ask your GP or psychiatrist.
Take care
 
I

iWILLOBTAINMENTALHEALTH2

Well-known member
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Jan 6, 2019
Messages
690
#9
I know it's hard and easy said than done. But the key is to never give up, ever. I've struggled with mental illness since I was 5 years young. That's 27 years. I've survived being molested, beat, bullied, permanently mentally and physically injured, and multiple suicide attempts. I've struggled for over a decade with medication and therapy trial and errors. Now I am finally in a better place. It takes a lot of time. Yes I still struggle every single day of my life. But I still keep fighting. You are stronger than you think. Keep up the good fight. Don't give up before the miracle. You can do it.
 
Valka

Valka

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Joined
Feb 12, 2019
Messages
324
Location
England (NW)
#10
Well you have people here who care and will listen to you that's for sure.
7.5+ Billion people on this planet, that's a lot of potential friendships! :)
 
A

amy100

Member
Joined
Dec 1, 2015
Messages
15
#11
yea I take medication for depression and bipolar.
I really have no one. it annoys me that some people say they have no one, and then they say actually they have one good friend. Literally I have no one, no friends, noone I can talk to. I live on my own, that's it.
talking doesn't help anyway, iv done all that. ive done long term counselling.
sorry I dont know what will help, I dont think there are any answers.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Messages
9,380
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#12
Hi Amy,
I'm sorry things are hard right now, have you ever tried combination drug treatments?
Sometimes two or three drugs work better together.
It's good your dr phoned, I hope she does care.
Maybe she was on annual leave when you emailed.
Try the Samaritans they can help with listening.
Take care
 
pinscher chi

pinscher chi

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 16, 2019
Messages
153
Location
Indiana, USA
#13
yea I take medication for depression and bipolar.
I really have no one. it annoys me that some people say they have no one, and then they say actually they have one good friend. Literally I have no one, no friends, noone I can talk to. I live on my own, that's it.
talking doesn't help anyway, iv done all that. ive done long term counselling.
sorry I dont know what will help, I dont think there are any answers.

Well I know you don't know me, but I care enough to say, feel free to message me and write about anything you feel you need to talk about and I will try to be helpful or just be sympathetic. Everyone should have someone they feel they can talk to.
 
T

TiamatTeemo

Member
Joined
Jun 25, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Spain
#14
Hi, I'm new here and just 19. Maybe I haven't gone through half the things you did but I still have hope to find the right medication, meet new people and all of that and sometimes you need to get surrounded by people who care and believe. Believing things can change is what works for me even when the routine seems impossible to be changed. Feel free to message me 😁
Take care
 
D

Dunkin donut

Member
Joined
Jun 26, 2019
Messages
22
Location
Northern Ireland
#15
Hi, I'm new here and just 19. Maybe I haven't gone through half the things you did but I still have hope to find the right medication, meet new people and all of that and sometimes you need to get surrounded by people who care and believe. Believing things can change is what works for me even when the routine seems impossible to be changed. Feel free to message me 😁
Take care
Thank u very much that's was very nice off u I'm Matt by the way
 
J

Jules5

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 27, 2019
Messages
1,054
Location
Florida
#16
You have a lot of support on this forum I hope it makes you feel better quick. I know the feelings you are feeling and just seems like life is standing still for to long-but something always comes along to change this. Like this forum for instance. You can PM people and they will listen to you. That has to be a motivator right there that the world is going to be okay and it will get better-if it is for me it will for you too. God Bless and lots of hugs
 
S

sallimae76

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 18, 2019
Messages
212
Location
Tucson, AZ
#17
I was meant to go on holiday this week but I was so depressed/couldn't get out of bed/couldn't face seeing anyone or speaking to anyone. so I had to cancel it and wasted a load of money.
I just hate this life.
I have zero friends, no family, no one cares, I even emailed my shrink recently saying I was suicidal and she ignored me.
everyone hates me. this is self pitty but its true. I have tried for the last 15 years, and it never gets any better.
I feel the same way. I need a friend so bad. These voices are driving me crazy. He just keeps saying "ape" "I'm mad" "burn" and "I can't believe it" over and over again, like a broken record. I do not believe that I am mentally ill. I believe that there are people in my life that practice black and white magic. My sister told me that I was going to burn, and now I hear a voice that says that. My family members made reference to me masturbating in the privacy of my own room, and they frequently repeat conversations that I have had in private with other people, and repeat things that are in my diary, that I use to keep.
 

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