Sleeping to escape, obsessive parents.

[Cocoabean22]

Lately, I have felt more down than usual. I am at university now and I thought that once I left home my parents would calm down, but they are still as obsessive. They do everything for me and never leave me alone. Even though i'm here now they expect me to come home a lot, do things for me and they are suffocating me. I have that much food that I can't fit it in the kitchen so I have had to stash some under my bed. What I mean is, they are just doing things for me all of the time. I have no independence whatsoever. I like that now I can leave my apartment and not have to consult anyone else, I can just go. But, that doesn't mean much when they're still wanting me to be there all of the time.They are acting like I can't do things for myself, like I have something wrong with me. When I say I need space they get offended and ask if something is wrong. My dad keeps saying 'whats wrong' 'we're only trying to help' and I try and explain that i'm not telling them to leave me alone completely, I just mean loosen the leash a little.
This seems harsh but they infuriate me, my childhood was awful and they say im lucky because we have a good amount of money. But all I wanted was for them to treat me right, there's so much I could say about my childhood but in short I was petrified of them due to their actions. I just hate them, I really do. I wish they would just go away forever. I know that sounds horrible but they have made my life a misery, insulting me, calling me names, forcing me to be someone i'm not, saying they don't like my friends, threatening me, hitting me. I have no friends due to my underbite and my dad said that I push people around and that's why I have no friends. But, I don't push people around because im too scared to talk to people as I was bullied.
I have always liked sleeping, but lately I wake up wanting to sleep again. I create some sort of alternate reality (unsure if those are the right words.) I imagine what I wish my life was, completely free and I could do whatever I wanted. For a moment I feel like I am in that world and everything is perfect. It sounds so bizarre and I know that I can't change things and live in a perfect world. But I wish that I could. That place in my head makes me feel calm and I don't want to come back to reality. I want to dream forever.

 

[daffy]

When i started to read your post i thought that it was just that your family were missing you and just wanted the best for you but as i read further and realised you had problems when growing up. I would start by saying your workload is getting heavy and you need to work at weekends so you cant go home as often. Try and join some of the clubs where your studying. Also you will have a councillor at uni. Make an appointment with them. I’m sure they’ll be able to give you some support

 

[bpd2020]

Hello and welcome to the forum. It sounds like your parents are very controlling as you have asked for them to step back and they refuse. Do you think it is possible to set firmer boundaries? Such as not answering your phone until you are feeling like talking or not agreeing to see them unless you want to?

I can understand you wanting to sleep as it is a place for you to escape your parents and their control. You do not sound like a bad person. You have every right to be treated like an adult.