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Since committing to living, I've found life quite exhausting

B

Blue Pen

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I decided years ago I wouldn't attempt suicide anymore and would "commit to living" (therapists term for it). I.e., I'm not going to try anymore and I will do my best at looking for solutions etc because I am committing to being alive. But I gotta say this shit is testing. I feel even worse knowing that most people have a lot harder lives and circumstances than me and I am still upset and can barely cope sometimes. Lately it has felt like it's one thing wrong after the other, and I am in a situation where I could end up homeless if I am not careful so it's really getting to me.

Just wanted to vent. I know it could be worse, but I just feel down that life is difficult and it's worse for many - I know comparing doesn't help but I am just trying to be grateful and it's not really working rn
 
TooMuchPain

TooMuchPain

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I feel even worse knowing that most people have a lot harder lives and circumstances than me and I am still upset and can barely cope sometimes.
I don’t think this should make you feel worse. Its doesn’t matter that others have it worse. Your pain is your pain. I hope you can find a way to work through this. Please release the guilt of having weakened mental health. (Easier said than done. I struggle with this too). I hope you can find a way out.
:hug1:
 
jajingna

jajingna

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Yes, I suppose you can say "some others have it worse than me" but is it of any benefit? Maybe to appreciate what you do have, as you say, be grateful.

Some have it worse, some have it better... isn't that true pretty much all the time?
 
B

Blue Pen

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Yes, I suppose you can say "some others have it worse than me" but is it of any benefit? Maybe to appreciate what you do have, as you say, be grateful.

Some have it worse, some have it better... isn't that true pretty much all the time?
It is true, but hard to shake the feeling when you are raised to constantly be aware of how bad others have it and how grateful you should be. I understand that it's not necessarily helpful, but I guess I use it to try and keep perspective and stop myself from drowning. "I could have it a lot worse, so try to not be so drastic about the circumstances and appreciate what I already have" kind of thing. But it seems to load more guilt. Do I deserve the things I have, when I have made terrible choices? I think that gratefulness does help but there's a line with it and I am still figuring out where that line truly is
 
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SadRainbow

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I'm sorry things are so tough Blue Pen. I am trying my best to be committed to living too. My motivation is my little girl, but it doesn't make me feel good. I love her and want the best for her so I keep going, but it's *so* hard.

Don't compare your situation to others. If anything it will only make you feel guilty and worse. Remember you have an illness and it's not your fault.

I hope you feel a bit better soon.
 
Bod

Bod

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Pretty Good
I decided years ago I wouldn't attempt suicide anymore and would "commit to living" (therapists term for it). I.e., I'm not going to try anymore and I will do my best at looking for solutions etc because I am committing to being alive. But I gotta say this shit is testing. I feel even worse knowing that most people have a lot harder lives and circumstances than me and I am still upset and can barely cope sometimes. Lately it has felt like it's one thing wrong after the other, and I am in a situation where I could end up homeless if I am not careful so it's really getting to me.

Just wanted to vent. I know it could be worse, but I just feel down that life is difficult and it's worse for many - I know comparing doesn't help but I am just trying to be grateful and it's not really working rn

Hi Blue Pen, that is great that you will not try anymore so be very proud of that choice you have earned it.
In our lives we have many things that get thrown at us and I swear blind it is to test us with how we cope, and that is just what we do we cope with whatever is thrown our way, yes it can be shit and we think it will never end but it does, sometimes it can be very slow but we get there we always compare to other people and sometimes it bothered me but now it does not as there are others who are and could be far worse than me so I have to think of Number 1 ME, and that is what you have to do.
 
A

Alexander Ypsilantis

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I decided years ago I wouldn't attempt suicide anymore and would "commit to living" (therapists term for it). I.e., I'm not going to try anymore and I will do my best at looking for solutions etc because I am committing to being alive. But I gotta say this shit is testing. I feel even worse knowing that most people have a lot harder lives and circumstances than me and I am still upset and can barely cope sometimes. Lately it has felt like it's one thing wrong after the other, and I am in a situation where I could end up homeless if I am not careful so it's really getting to me.

Just wanted to vent. I know it could be worse, but I just feel down that life is difficult and it's worse for many - I know comparing doesn't help but I am just trying to be grateful and it's not really working rn
Complaining is everyone's right, at least we are allowed that one.

The way I see it, every morning when you get up and go to work-you've earned your right to complain for that day. As long as you carry your share of the burden, you're entitled to complain.

If someone else doesn't like it, too bad.
 
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