T
ok i have been ill all my life with depression an anxierty, 2 years ago i hit bad an was up to 10 lorozepam, an a bottle of brandy a day,hospital calcelations an bad apointment dates srewed my head.wife took me to hospital millbrook. you wont believe the rest. this new shrink stopped dead my loz an brandy,an put me on velafaxine the highest rated suicide drug out, an sent me home,the first night i had massive anxiety attack ,my son gave kiss of life , up to A,M, PUT ON OXEGEN FOR NIGHT AN GIVEN WAIT FOR IT, 2 LOZ .second night took masive overdose i thought my brain was on fire.lay on bed took giant swig of vodka an waited . suddenly pucked nearly all capsules out. ambulance, mental hospital ,given 225mg ven a drug that hates me an 2mg valium 3 times a day ,thats it.lay naked on stone shower floor 3 days sweat matching the water from the shower no more help.crawled along corridor at night asked night staff fat man , could i have a fan ,he had 2 on his desk, he said i only have these 2 ,if i could of got of floor i would of decked him .put in dorm with 3 teenage heroin addicts an a syco.dont get me wrong they were great lads but they got up at 2 pm an bed at2am in cig breaks outside smoked heroin an at night drank vodka from water bottles, i skiped the heroin but had some of there vodka so i could grab 3 hours sleep. bluffed my way out after a week worse than i went in.drank vodka to stop from shakeing to pieces,went to g.p who put me back on 4 loz an lowered the ven an saved my life .i was hard for months but stabilized an now om loz an cymbalta,that experiance would kill most people how i came though i dont no the shrink he still works at the hospital