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should I see my GP about going to hospital?

L

laulipop

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So to today. Today I was feeling in an agitated mood but was just about managing to keep it under control by having a quiet and gentle day watching some football on the TV and tinkering on the computer etc. I went out to find my husband in the utility area where we keep our dryer and freezer and while we were out there the dog started doing her usual barking act for when the door goes or when she hears sounds that she doesn't know etc. anyway, we didn't hear anyone knock so I just assumed she was having a funny 5 minutes. Then I went i to the house because I wanted to get the washing basket from the dining room and just as I was about to walk in to the dining room I heard 2 "strange" voices.

I bolted straight back out to the utility area to find my husband and told him amidst a panic so he gave me a hug and told me that he would go in to find out who it was. As it turned out it was 2 friends of ours who we have only known about 5 months since we moved in to the house that we are in now. He asked me if I wanted to come in with him to see them (he hadn't told them that I was out the back or ill or anything) and I said I didn't and he said that was OK and gave me a hug and then he went in to deal with them. Before he went back in though, I said to him who let them in (cos I haven't been good at people just turning up at the house unannounced since my depression started nearly 4 weeks ago) and he said that our 17 year old daughter had let them in without thinking (I can't really blame her) and that they had come to see the kittens because some mutual friends had told them about them when they were born nearly 3 weeks ago. I was having really bad paranoid delusions and I said to him...this isn't a freak show...they haven't come to see the kittens at all, they've come to see the freak! and he said that wasn't true and they didn't even know i was sick but that he was going in to try to get them out the house as quickly as possible.

I ended up being out there for over half an hour, and was almost manic, having paranoid delusions and thinking that it was a conspiracy and they were all in there plotting how to get rid of me etc and my thoughts were racing etc and I was really freaking out and I ended up scratching all down my left arm. I left real quite deep scratches without making myself bleed, but that's the first time I have ever done that. Then I got to thinking about needing to bring my appointment with the community mental health team forward. I'm meant to have it on the 15th June, but that's nearly 3 weeks away and things are getting really, really bad.When I found out it was my daughter that let the people in, I got so angry I could have really upset her (and may be even have hurt her I don't know where my boundaries are with this) if I had seen her. Fortunately she was between 3 doors and with those other people and I was on my own. Then I was thinking about seeing my GP or something tomorrow (if I can get an emergency appointment) and asking to be admitted to a psychiatric unit, but then I started thinking....am I ill enough for that and if I did go in how would my family cope with that and how would I cope without them and also what if my husband meets someone else while I'm in there and I lose him? 'cos I really couldn't cope with that.

It's not just today that has made me wonder about going to hospital. As I am just going through the diagnosis process at the moment, and so don't have a definitive diagnosis of Bipolar, but I do fit all the criteria etc and it was my husband that first mentioned it to me and then someone else unconnected said about it too....I can't carry on like this anymore. I know that much.

Any thoughts/help will be gratefully received
 
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KP1

KP1

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I think I would see the GP but don't jump the gun and assume it means hospital there could be lots of stages to go through first. Seeking help is a good starting point for you.It sounds like you have a good supportive husband.
Take care.
KP:hug:
 
L

laulipop

Guest
thanks KP1 for your reply. my husband made an appointment with the GP for tomorrow morning, so that will be a relief in some ways to see someone soon, but I'm also nervous about it.
Do you think I should request to go in to hospital?
 
KP1

KP1

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There may be other help you can get. I have been under the crisis team (home treatment team) in the past. It didn't stop me needing to go into hospital but the stays were much shorter than they would have been. It something you can discuss with the doctor.
KP
 
L

laulipop

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ah. o.k. and the home crisis team. what do they do?
are they there for like emergencies and stuff or anything?
thanks for your info KP, I really appreciate it.
how ru?
:hug::hug:
 
KP1

KP1

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where I live they are a home visiting team who can see you once or twice day and cover care assessment and treatment. They also contol entry to the psychiatric acute admissions team. They look after you normally for 6 weeks max and that includes when you are discharged from hospital. They are made up of all different mental health workers including psychiatrist so prescribe meds.
Take care.
KP
 
S

suzy

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Flippin eck you want to go to hospital ! :eek:
 
L

laulipop

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hi suzy....
no i dont really want to go to hospital but this is really effecting my familybadly and i can't stand seeing them all suffer at my hands. does that make sense?
 
S

suzy

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Yeah I understand that


You can't normally admit yourself. If you are a risk to others though then yes they might. I don't know what the process is, people would interview you I guess. Are you on medication?


Are you with the crisis team? They will visit you. I hope things get sorted out
 
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