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She Called Me Out On Social Media For Everyone To See

micheledillon

micheledillon

New member
Joined
Aug 11, 2018
Messages
4
Location
Kentucky
I may or may not have posted a few anxiety related statuses on Facebook. Today, I shared a post about a storm featuring sirens and expressing how the sound made me feel (which was majestic as I love storms and sirens).

However, my mom replied and turned the situation into an anxiety intervention. Mind you, I didn't mention anxiety (or any mental illness) once in this post. She started to call me out about it.

This resulted in me removing the storm post and deactivating my entire Facebook. I texted her and asked her where all of that came from and one thing she said keeps sticking in my mind... she said that everyone finds me a joke and that I should stop posting about my anxiety on social media. She told me that she is the only one that cares... but her calling me out like that for everyone to see makes me believe otherwise.

What do you all think?

A little insight on my mother... she, too, suffers from anxiety and depression. She always calls me out and gives me "tough love" which never works, but makes everything worse. She recently had a stroke and she is a completely different person now. When she's not calling me out for my problems, she acts like God is this wonderful being and that everything in life is beautiful and wonderful.

Does she actually care or is she emotionally abusing me? I just need unbiased opinions because I'm sick of seeking help from my friends and family because this is what usually happens when I do.
 
C

claude

Guest
Oh wow, that doesnt sound much fun for you.
Your mum might not be able to help her behavior if she has just had a stroke. Depending on which part of her brain and how badly/permanent the damage caused is, strokes can change the way people behave and think and effect their ability to act appropriately. I do not think your mums post was kind but she might not have meant to be unkind. Either way, it doesn't make things easier for you.
Some people are not so great hearing or talking about difficult emotions, the way social media works means there is always a chance someone will react unkindly to vulnerability. I think you need to focus on your own needs, does posting about your anxiety help you? Is it worth the risk of negativity?
 
micheledillon

micheledillon

New member
Joined
Aug 11, 2018
Messages
4
Location
Kentucky
claude thank you for your response. I should have given more insight on her. This behavior is very common for her. She has done this to me before her stroke, but much worse. She and I would fight all of the time.

I always used my social media as a blog of sorts, because I like writing and speaking about my feelings and thoughts. However, my audience (close friends and family) aren't very supportive. Writing always helps me, but when I get any negative feedback, I give up and deactivate my Facebook every time.
 
R

Randomcrisis

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 8, 2018
Messages
53
Social media is not always the best place to express these things, in my experience. If you don't find friends or family are particularly supportive FB is probably not the place to convince them otherwise. There is real catharsis in writing things down but where you share that is another matter. If you have friends that are more supportive you can edit the privacy on some posts so that only they can see it. Personally I share nothing about mental health on social media but keep a diary on a mental health app on my phone - but each to their own..
 
exyz

exyz

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 14, 2017
Messages
2,773
Agree with Randomcrisis, also no need for your mother to be on your Facebook, I have never even suggested it to my adult children. Their business.

I'm sorry about your mother's stroke, that is awful to suffer, brain injury does make you act differently as Claude explains.
 
R_Sxo

R_Sxo

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 24, 2017
Messages
2,350
Hi micheledillion,

Sorry to hear what you're going through. It sounds like while writing out your emotions and experiences are helpful for you, those around you either aren't comfortable with it, or don't believe you. Either way, social media is generally not a great way to do this. A forum like this is good, because the people here generally understand and are supportive. Or you could write it in a diary, and avoid the negative judgement completelyx

It's difficult to tell if your mother cares from what you've said. Calling someone out isn't the most constructive way to help someone, but then she is right in saying that posing about anxiety on social media isn't a good idea. It sounds like if she does care, she's not doing in a helpful way - let her know that while she may mean well, her approach is making things worse x

Much love <3
 
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