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Shame

M

Mav2126

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 14, 2021
Messages
78
Location
New York
I think one of the worst feelings is shame. I feel like I am doing good at work but I am so scared that I am going to mess up and I have these fantasies that when I fuck up I am going to feel the worst shame possible. I will be embarrassed and shown as a fraud.
 
N

Nate

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 20, 2019
Messages
219
Location
Augusta, Maine
I think one of the worst feelings is shame. I feel like I am doing good at work but I am so scared that I am going to mess up and I have these fantasies that when I fuck up I am going to feel the worst shame possible. I will be embarrassed and shown as a fraud.
I sometimes feel as though I'm going to skrew up. Like when something is happening good I always feel as though the other shoe is going to fall and I'm going to fail. But I know that's just my illness and I'm going to be alright. Best of luck 🍀
 
AlrightOkay

AlrightOkay

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 15, 2021
Messages
527
Location
South
Try to tell yourself positive things. Sometimes when we think bad things, we can think them into existance
 
H

Huntergreen

Active member
Joined
Mar 10, 2021
Messages
33
Location
England
You can’t help your thoughts and feelings but one thing I can promise you is... you are no fraud!!!
 
jajingna

jajingna

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 31, 2020
Messages
4,807
Location
Canada
I wonder what good shame does, or what is its function? If we've done nothing wrong, why is it there?

I think for me, it may have arrived at an early age, in childhood. Somehow my parents may have made me feel ashamed even though I did nothing or little wrong. I've carried some shame along with me over the years and decades, barely aware of it. I think it hides itself quite well, a buried emotion, that steers behavior and feelings from behind the scenes. Exposing this shame by paying some attention to it, reveals it to be a sort of impostor, a trickster who has been up to no good. He's been telling me how unworthy I must be, how I'm not good enough somehow. He's manipulative and deceitful.

He has played this role for a really long time, lurking in the shadows where I didn't even see him there. Now I'm calling him on his bluff. He hasn't got a good excuse for what he's done to me. He's there along with the overbearing conscience, the one who is too fussy about small things. The one who thinks that just being OK is not good enough, and also that I am not good enough.

Shame was put there by others who had too much of their own. It's not moral or virtuous, it's a liar who is in the way. He's OK now and then, once in a while, in small doses. When he's around a lot, he's a poison. I don't see much benefit in him being there. He's a drag on feeling good about myself.
 
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