- Feb 2, 2019
I used to love benzodiazepines with passion! Nothing seemed impossible, I could handle anything with a smile on my face. My tower of illusions collapsed in November 2017 with a convulsive status epilepticus episode. I'm 37, thus too old to refuze reality. So my only option were the antidepressants. I used sertraline before, I know what it does, what to expect from it. And it work for my symptoms of depression, but it had big shoes to fill, my benzodiazepine addiction having ruin my natural sleep patterns. After months of insomnia, mirtazapine was added to my treatment. And it was love at first sight! How could a drug on it's lowest dosage help someone who couldn't sleep on 60 milligrams of xanax sleep well night after night? And it still works after almost an year at the lowest dose of 15 mg. But it ruined my days, as my depression got worst and it never work well with sertraline. I tried mirtazapine alone at 30 mg but it was ineffective. Now as I write this, I feel very frustrated because I have to choose between two drugs, one that makes my days better but ruins my nights and the other who does exactly the opposite.
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