Serious advice needed :(

[Itvmonkey]

Hi All,

This isn't a nice first post to make but i found this site via google and i need some advice desperately.

I dont want to go into to much detail but im worried about my dad, ill give you some background information so you understand whats going on.

My mom is disabled, suffers with alot of complaints but recently (8 months) shes been unable to walk completely because of a foot ulcer. This has put a lot of stress on me and dad as we are having to do everything.

Anyway yesterday i bought a new television into the house, a 50 inch plasma to replace a 32 inch tv. We have a fairly decent size room so it looks ok. Basically dads always been a bit moody and had a few mood swings but this tv incident has seemed to push him over the edge. He says his leaving home, his threatened to knock me out cus im cheeking him (when i haven't said anything bad), he said he feels like the meat in the sandwich, says me and mom are ganging up on him. But even worse he says nastier things, like im no son of his anymore, he wants my mom dead, may slit her throat etc..

I honestly dont think he would though, anytime i text anyone his like ahh your texting about me etc.. And he also says moms foot ulcer is caused by his dead mother cursing her. and that the worst is to come..

I know this isnt like my dad But his had these occasional swings for years. His currently on depressants and sees a mental health nurse. The nurse just puts his depression and low feeling down to my mom being ill. But im sure there missing something. I haven't had chance to speak to the nurse yet.

I know its not nice to post about but im generally worried and simply carnt talk to him when his like this, do any of you have any idea what it could be or what i can do?

I could post alot more but its like an essay already

Thanks
Monkey

 

[Ainsworth]

hello Monkey

i too am in the same position of being classed as depressed because of family factors that i dont have control of, when i know there is much more to it. the CPN agreed with me but as the p-doc has said it depression i am stuck and not allowed to see the twat again (p-doc sorry)

depression if not treated correctly can get much worse. are the tablets having an effect on him? the problem is your dads needs to see there is a problem in the first place. even if he is depressed he may need some counselling to help with any feelings he is having, though he needs to agree with it.

im sorry im not much help, going through a bad time myself but just wanted to give some support to you

 

[Itvmonkey]

At the min he is saying that he would be fine if me and mom weren't in his life but im sure thats not really him talking if you know what i mean..

I was thinking it was signs of schizophrenia, i just hope im wrong

Sorry to hear your having a rough time

 

[Ainsworth]

try not to read anything into it atm, you dont need to scare yourself. believe me from experience i tick every box there is and been diagnosed given drugs and then been told i havent got it

 

[Itvmonkey]

But from my point of view, i bought in a new tele.. no debt, its nice.. I dont get what ive done wrong But he is convinced ive done something bad.

Also his been spending a lot of time in bed lately, he says its to avoid the tv. But he come down earlier to tell mom to stop coughing, saying it was being done on purpose..

Its just these little incidents that all add up

Hope im wrong

 

[Ainsworth]

why does that lead you to think its schizophrenia?

depression is a bad illness, it changes people very badly especially if its not treated properly.

matey i know how hard it is for you, your watching the behaviours and taking the hurt and anger from someone you love. its very hard to see the ones we love going through something like this.

but try not to think its 'something' thats for the doctors to work out.

 

[Itvmonkey]

Ill try mate, they aint that bothered though they just put it down to mom being ill. They dont see a bigger picture

 

[Twylight]

Caring for someone can cause a lot of pressure
Hope your Mum gets more mobile soon

 

[Itvmonkey]

It sure does! Thanks

 

[Ainsworth]

i know matey, the system can suck big time, i should know, sadly.

take care and keep talking, people will give you support to. you need to talk too

 

[iffybob]

Hi

I think you were right when you said you think you need to talk to his MH nurse ... she may not see these things and the changes you do ...

I also think it may help to have a sitdown chat with your dad , explain to him 'why' you bought him the TV and that you did it out of caring and as a gift .. to help him understand ..

.. if you could arrange some one to look after your mum for an afternoon and take him out somwhere he would like ... I think that might help ... just the few hours break ...

.. it might also be his mediaction , it might not be right for him.

Take care .... boB ...