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Self Image



Just when I thought I was starting to forget the comments made by my ex boyfriend about certain TV women, I only picked up the newspaper to see the La senza model on the front of the paper! Deep down I know I am being silly but I wish I could stop beating myself up with stupid thoughts about looks and body image. I know half the time he was joking with me and did not understand my illness so therefore did not realise how much he was effecting me and even though he complimented me the damage was already done.


I have fought with my body image all my life (anorectic until my early 30's) and I'm now 50. My last partner would tell me he like big women and then would refuse to sleep with me because I'd got big. So when I became single again 2 years ago I never thought I'd meet anyone. I have lost some weight but still have the lumps and bumps that seem to go with someone a little overweight.

I started dating again last year and I am astounded at how the men I've dated regularly tell me I have a gorgeous figure. I have something to get hold of, I'm not a bag of bones, I'm wonderful to cuddle up to.

Most men want that, it's the advertisers that want stick insects.


Apr 21, 2009
Definitely! Advertising has a lot to answer for, and it's sad because it doesn't even reflect what real guys want! The problem is, if you try to be something that you're not, then you'll attract people who like the image, not the real you. That's not to say you shouldn't be healthy and look after yourself, but it's natural for women to have a few curves, not be skin and bones!

I've been in a situation where what I thought I wanted was someone "typically" beautiful, and broke up with my girlfriend at the time because of it. I then realised I was a damn fool, and realised that you can still be attracted to someone who isn't a pinup model. Luckily we got back together, but it was a hard lesson to learn. I will never forget it though, so maybe take it easy on your ex. Sometimes the advertising is just as detrimental to guys who believe that beauty is a certain "image" or "look", and deep down they know it's not really the case.

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