• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Self harmed for the first time in years

  • Thread starter manicpixiedreamgirl
  • Start date
manicpixiedreamgirl

manicpixiedreamgirl

Member
Joined
Apr 8, 2020
Messages
9
Location
Europe
I feel so so ashamed... I am writing here because I can't really tell anyone. My partner is having a rough time and I don't want to make him feel even worse.
In the past I have self harmed really few times and it was years ago. I never want anyone to know I self harm so I do other forms of SH that aren't obvious to other people.
Lately though I have had such a strong urge to do it. And I did... For some reason I feel calmer? But at the same time extremely tired and ashamed.
 
Mario82

Mario82

Taking a break
Joined
Apr 4, 2020
Messages
3,781
Location
UK
Please don't feel ashamed, you have a mental illness and a compulsion which affects you, can't always control it.

Feeling calmer is good but you shouldn't have to self-harm to feel that way.
 
Zackthemaniac

Zackthemaniac

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 16, 2019
Messages
1,524
Location
North Carolina
You feel calmer cause the act release built up emotion. But this is not a habit you want to fall back into. You need to talk or use other coping skills.
 
Rowan

Rowan

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 25, 2011
Messages
2,827
Are you seeing a therapist at the moment?
 
R

Rainwriter

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 6, 2020
Messages
74
Location
England, uk
You need to forgive yourself (i know that's much easier said than done) you're struggling at the minute, and that's okay. Feeling ashamed can often lead to a vicious cycle of more SH.
SH has a physical reaction, you're body releases endorphins which is why you feel calmer - but you need to try other coping strategies, and find one that works for you.
I used to struggle with this but if I ever feel that compulsion I have a piece of wood that I scratch/carve into, or you could try tearing paper of scribbling on paper?
 
P

Prycejosh1987

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2020
Messages
619
Location
UK
Lately though I have had such a strong urge to do it. And I did... For some reason I feel calmer? But at the same time extremely tired and ashamed.
Self harm is not the answer. Find a way of conquering your issues. Try talking to your partner about it, and work things out together, find each other help. You need to do things for yourself too, try therapy.
 
Similar threads
Thread starter Title Forum Replies Date
KateKane Just Self-Harmed for the First time In Four Years Self Harm Forum 31
EarthChild Self harmed a lot today Feel like ending my life Self Harm Forum 8
J Self harmed Self Harm Forum 261
N Sleep Deprivation Used To Self Harm Self Harm Forum 5
MiniThoughts Any methods of distraction from intrusive thoughts that lead to self-harm? Self Harm Forum 10
L Self harm cheating partner Self Harm Forum 5
TheSadnessWillLastForever Is it supposed to hurt this much? *TW Self Harm* Self Harm Forum 7
A Self harm when feeling guilty Self Harm Forum 3
N Diabetics Who Self Harm (TRIGGER WARNING) Self Harm Forum 4
J I just keep self harm Self Harm Forum 4
S I wanted to self harm but I couldn't bring myself to do it Self Harm Forum 3
G Self harming. Self Harm Forum 4
Luneup Fell back into self harm. Self Harm Forum 6
Hello513 I swear to never self harm, or attempt suicide again. Self Harm Forum 7
B Self Harm Addiction Self Harm Forum 6
maggie0123 started self-harming again Self Harm Forum 9
O Does the urge to self harm ever go away? Self Harm Forum 6
L Self harm Self Harm Forum 14
D Help: i talk to my self too much defending my abusers Self Harm Forum 3
Zardos I've Been Thinking Of Self-harming All Morning. Self Harm Forum 6
J What does it take for doctors to take my self harm seriously? Self Harm Forum 4
T self harming because im a failure Self Harm Forum 22
F I have recently started having thoughts of self harming Self Harm Forum 5
G self harm tonight Self Harm Forum 8
midnightphoenix please dont do self harms Self Harm Forum 3
L Self harm instead of suicide Self Harm Forum 28
J Have Self Harm Sores All Over Myself Right Now Self Harm Forum 5
midnightphoenix self harms Self Harm Forum 9
G Increase self harm when starting meds Self Harm Forum 3
F Why do people sometimes self harm on their face? Self Harm Forum 40
D Please get help for self harming as soon as you can. My story Self Harm Forum 3
R Self harm Self Harm Forum 2
G Self harm and A&E? Self Harm Forum 12
frenchiebpd I have a strong urge to self harm and don't know how to get rid of it Self Harm Forum 2
T Self harm scars & prevention Self Harm Forum 2
D I've seen a girl causing self harm on a live app,what should i do?,need advice. Self Harm Forum 3
J Do I need to know why I self harm in order to stop? Self Harm Forum 4
D Struggling with self harm Self Harm Forum 9
midnightphoenix Nobody deserves self harms Self Harm Forum 2
T Self harming cause if worthlessness Self Harm Forum 9
C Self harm in my sleep? Self Harm Forum 5
N Trying to stop self harm Self Harm Forum 4
K Self harm thoughts Self Harm Forum 11
O Self harm for approval. Self Harm Forum 5
N The Dangers Of Self Harming Self Harm Forum 6
T a list of self-harm habits or website that my prevent me from doing them Self Harm Forum 10
F I'm not guilty about my self harm Self Harm Forum 31
F self harm urges :( Self Harm Forum 3
C Advice for self harm Self Harm Forum 10
N Self harm Self Harm Forum 5

Similar threads

Top