- Apr 15, 2009
Hi, I've been wanting to talk to somebody about this for a while now, but do to the fear of the public stigma and misunderstanding surrounding mental disorders, I always kept quiet. I'll start off with a little history. I'm 18 years old and I've been a chronic user of marijuana since I was 12, at one point in my teens I smoked more joints than cigarettes daily. When I turned 16 I started experimenting with heavier substances. I've tried just about every type of drug except the ones you inject, I hate needles. When I was 17 I became addicted to ecstasy. I binged at first, but in order to avoid the down time I started using daily. I took on average about 4-8 pills a day, for about 2 months straight. During these 2 months I began hearing things. I live in an upstairs duplex, and late at night, at first only when I was high, I heard what I thought to be my neighbors having sex. At first I thought it was real, it continued every night, all night, for about a week. I couldn't sleep because of the noise and finally decided to go talk to them. When I did I found out that my neighbors were two brothers, who lived alone, and both worked nights. I decided to get clean the next day. After my 5 day burnout, which consisted of auditory as well as visual hallucinations of many different things, I was clean. I even quit smoking weed a week later. But I still heard things and still do. It comes and goes, almost always happens at night, and consists mainly of two things, my neighbors having sex (which I know for a fact isn't real but I still hear) and people outside laughing at me (which I also know is not real). Sometimes when I'm walking outside late at night I'll hear somebody walking behind me and yelling at me, but when I turn around nobody's there. I mainly just try to ignore it or drown it out with music. There's a few other symptoms, like I feel bugs crawling on me when I try to sleep, and I have trouble sleeping, sometimes I don't sleep at all. I don't know if these things are worse because I can't sleep or if I can't sleep because of these things. I think its amphetamine induced psychosis, but I've been 100% clean from anything for 6 months now. I mean I've just been waiting for it to wear off, but will it? How long does amphetamine induced psychosis last? When do I start worrying about schizophrenia? It seems I have all the symptoms of both. I really need some help cause I don't know how long I can keep this hidden. I mean I screamed shutup to nobody the other night and woke up my brother. i really don't know how much longer I can keep hiding this, I'm even becoming suicidal. I should probably mention that manic depressive bipolar disorder runs in my family, but I've been screened for it already. I really need somebodys opinion on this, is this gonna pass?? or do I need to see a psychiatrist?