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Saw my therapist and he told me the hard truth

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EstherRose94

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Lol I did not feel happy after leaving his office earlier but I feel better again now. Bf’s being super sweet and I’m excited but my therapist is like this is like an emotional game because he was talking breakups a couple weeks ago. And he told me to rip the bandaid off. Well maybe I will eventually but not today.

I AM generally way more calm though. My assessment for anxiety was almost zero today and that’s not because bf is sweet but because I’m finally feeling like myself again. Yay for that.

Part of my new treatment plan is eating better and getting to work on time. Earlier, I don’t have a formal start time but just 9 seems like what reasonable humans do lol.

And going to get some exercise now. So idk I guess the bandaid part will happen later!
 
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Girl interupted

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To be fair, he has ptsd, and he likely doesn’t know how he feels himself from day to day. That said, I’m in your therapists camp. As much as you love him, I don’t think you guys bring out the best in each other. I think his ptsd and your bpd feed each other’s illness.

Youre an adult, and only you know what’s good for you. You have to get there on your own or it’ll be fear of abandonment triggers and a painful year of breaking up and getting back.
 
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EstherRose94

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Yeah I can see how we don’t really work but like yesterday was just like how we used to be when we did work out. Idk I guess at some point I’ll be ready to decide but not yet.
 
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Zoe1

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when he said rip the band aid off
was that the therapist saying that ?
and did he mean a real bandaid
or a symbolic one ?

:hug5: 🕯
 
SwanLake

SwanLake

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Lol I did not feel happy after leaving his office earlier but I feel better again now. Bf’s being super sweet and I’m excited but my therapist is like this is like an emotional game because he was talking breakups a couple weeks ago. And he told me to rip the bandaid off. Well maybe I will eventually but not today.

I AM generally way more calm though. My assessment for anxiety was almost zero today and that’s not because bf is sweet but because I’m finally feeling like myself again. Yay for that.

Part of my new treatment plan is eating better and getting to work on time. Earlier, I don’t have a formal start time but just 9 seems like what reasonable humans do lol.

And going to get some exercise now. So idk I guess the bandaid part will happen later!
I’ve always maintained that in order to keep yourself calm, which is essence is how to control BPD, that you must do certain things. These include eating a healthy diet and always having breakfast. No caffeine after 15.00. Exercise regularly. Doing basic meditation and yoga on a regular basis. You put in place a healthy regime for your body your sleep will improve. Furthermore a healthy body leads to a healthy mind.
You have come so far since we first spoke. I am sooooo very proud of you. Well done!!! Keep up the good work and have the courage to take that band aid off with your therapist. There’s nothing to fear but fear itself. I absolutely promise you that you’ll feel so much better when you do. x
 
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EstherRose94

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when he said rip the band aid off
was that the therapist saying that ?
and did he mean a real bandaid
or a symbolic one ?

:hug5: 🕯
My therapist saying that since I’ve admitted that bf and I have really different life goals and at times we argue a lot I’ll either have to like break it off now (rip off the bandaid) or keep going back and forth which is ultimately more painful
 
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EstherRose94

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I’ve always maintained that in order to keep yourself calm, which is essence is how to control BPD, that you must do certain things. These include eating a healthy diet and always having breakfast. No caffeine after 15.00. Exercise regularly. Doing basic meditation and yoga on a regular basis. You put in place a healthy regime for your body your sleep will improve. Furthermore a healthy body leads to a healthy mind.
You have come so far since we first spoke. I am sooooo very proud of you. Well done!!! Keep up the good work and have the courage to take that band aid off with your therapist. There’s nothing to fear but fear itself. I absolutely promise you that you’ll feel so much better when you do. x
Aw thanks Lunus ☺ Nice to see you on here again!
 
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EstherRose94

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I agree with all that but like the past two days have been all honeymoony again so.. idk I feel like all that worrying was years ago and not days ago lol. I know it’ll come back (like 5% of me is still hoping it won’t) but assuming it probably will I know I’ll be able to make a decision.
 
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Zoe1

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n yeah I'm not sure you can just ' rip the band aid off '
I find its more of a process with these things
I need to go round and round with it as long as I need to

and feel my feelings
acknowledge them , let go of them
feel them again , explore them
be glad of them

I need to praise this person that I love
love them, appreciate them, before I could consider letting go
my relationships were precious to me
not a band aid !

im not saying you need to leave your therapist
just rather than you dont have to obey him either

:hug5::love:
 
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EstherRose94

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Thanks Zoe! I know. I like my therapist but sometimes I’m like dude I’m not gonna do that. I know it, you know it. I’m just nodding anyway lol. He’s right actually. It’ll eventually be necessary for my mental health. Unless bf keeps being super sweet! This is the real him I’m pretty sure. The one I fell in love with. I just think his personal problems keep him from being affectionate a lot of the time. It’s at least good to know that when we’re both at our best we are a pretty good pair. So maybe someday? Idk.
 
SwanLake

SwanLake

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Thanks Zoe! I know. I like my therapist but sometimes I’m like dude I’m not gonna do that. I know it, you know it. I’m just nodding anyway lol. He’s right actually. It’ll eventually be necessary for my mental health. Unless bf keeps being super sweet! This is the real him I’m pretty sure. The one I fell in love with. I just think his personal problems keep him from being affectionate a lot of the time. It’s at least good to know that when we’re both at our best we are a pretty good pair. So maybe someday? Idk.
You will know when you’ve cracked it with your therapist when you no longer fear your emotions and can let out what you really need to discuss. As always, I wish you continued success on your journey. x
 
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Girl interupted

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I think the minute you stop editing yourself, is when you hit that breakthrough.
 
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