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Sad and pathetic

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george81

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2019
Messages
209
Location
UK
Hello all, I'm sorry for posting to several forums tonight, I feel sad and pathetic and a waste of space and it's my birthday now which always makes me feel worse as it only highlights what a failure I am at my age. I have SH'ed and am angry for putting on weight and feel stupid, ugly, hated and a waste of space. I feel disappointed that I'm still here at this age to reach another birthday. Hugs to all x
 
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Mojo89

Member
Joined
Nov 12, 2020
Messages
6
Location
Uk
Hi George, I'm sorry you feel this way, I'm feeling very similar to you right now. Happy Birthday, and big hugs to you.
 
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george81

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2019
Messages
209
Location
UK
Thank you very much Mojo89, please look after yourself x
 
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eu9919

Member
Joined
Nov 12, 2020
Messages
9
Location
Indonesia
Hi George, I am sorry to hear about your feelings on your birthday. I've spent few birthdays feeling down, sad and lonely. Even if it's late, I still want to wish you a good birthday and hope you feel better.
 

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treasurebox

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 14, 2018
Messages
509
Location
Philippines
Happy birthday. You are not alone. You were created to be happy. Happiness is a choice. So choose to be happy. Create happy moments. Do something new. Do what you love to do or are good at. Is it writing, doing arts and crafts, gardening, carpentry? whatever it is, do it. For it is your calling and purpose.
 
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EclipticNight

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 27, 2020
Messages
533
Location
Orleans vermont.
Happy birthday yesterday/ 2 days ago depending on where you are. I know how ya feel. Let me toss some logic your way to see if it helps. Logic always helped me.

How are you a failure? Did you try something large and life changing that you failed at? I doubt your a failure.

Age means very little besides how often you have to pee. There is no time limit on what age can and cant achieve something.

You gained weight? No big deal. It happens, nothing to hate yourself over. Most people wont even know. I fluctuate a good 7 pounds up and down.

If you feel stupid (which I doubt based on you finding this forum) you can learn new stuff. I'm always learning. I love it. I can also say if you read up on some answers people give in tests you'll find your not stupid. Google some.

Ugly is a bias, someone will find you adorable.

I dont hate you. If someone does why give them consideration at all anyways? Stuff em.

If your existence has ever once in history benifited or by influence benifited another your not a waste of space. More litterally the universe is made up mostly of wasted space making you some of the very little useful space.
 
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Elisante

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
May 16, 2020
Messages
1,707
Location
Greece
Happy Birthday!!:cheer:

Don't give up, there is always hope:hug1:
I don't think your description of yourself is accurate, especially now that you're upset. Try to think of at least three things that you like about yourself every time you feel down.
 
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always thirsty

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 12, 2020
Messages
125
Location
colorado
bro, i feel just like you do. spent my birthday (40s) alone last month. my bday present was being a dumbass the following week and falling for the "social security scam" which is where you get an official sounding call and if you are a true dumbass like me you end up giving them your name bday and last four of your ss#. dumbest thing i've done in my life maybe. on top of all the 2020 crap now i gotta deal with the anxiety that any day in the future someone could do any of the horrible things i've seen in the you tube videos.

on top of that i gained 20 pounds this year, probably bc i drank so much whiskey and soda chasers. i became unemployed and felt like a lowlife for taking unemployment money to get by. the depression, drinking and feeling worthless....the days all being the same. not having friends here since i was a workaholic as soon as i got here two years ago and didn't take time to make friends. not to mention i'm quite awkward at it despite being fairly social when i want to be. hoping to make friends here though!! :)

lets bask in misery together friend! who knows maybe we can somehow help each other regain some of our self respect.
 
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george81

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2019
Messages
209
Location
UK
Hello all, thank you so much for your kind replies, I have 40 minutes left of my birthday and thank god it's nearly over, every year it gets worse and more miserable. Always Thirsty, please keep going and don't let the bastards grind you down! You are a good person and deserve to live a good, happy life. I don't deserve this because I am a bad person and deserve to be hated. I hate myself as much as everyone hates me. I am an embarrassment, pathetic. Pointless. No one would miss me when I'm gone and I'm hoping it won't be a long time away. There's no release than on here, it's hard having to project a happy face when inside you want to die, or you feel like you're already dead. The urge to SH is overwhelming. Love to you all x
 
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always thirsty

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 12, 2020
Messages
125
Location
colorado
ah....had to look up SH in the urban dictionary. i appreciate your comment. i'm not a bad person but not a particularly good person atm. i am coming out of maybe the most miserable year of my life. i'm not gonna shoot sunshine up your ass. i don't have the answer to what will get you to appreciate what you have and i'm not gonna pretend i do. all i know is i've spent plenty of time hating myself and i'm just glad i found this site where people understand. i hope to get to know more about you and others on this site bc we can help each other conquer our fears, sadness, and anger just by keeping up with each other. i don't think SH will do much for you tbh. i remember self harming when i was younger and all i ended up with is a few messed up knuckles. definitely regret, and feel stupid in retrospect for having done it. also messed up a wrist a few years ago and now it hinders my ability to even get core exercise which is a bummer bc exercise helps more than anything when we can summon the will to get through those first few days of it. you know those days where you gotta FORCE yourself to get the exercise. then after that you start to look forward to it. eh, can't do anything about the past.
 
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george81

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2019
Messages
209
Location
UK
ah....had to look up SH in the urban dictionary. i appreciate your comment. i'm not a bad person but not a particualarly good person atm. i am coming out of maybe the most miserable year of my life. i'm not gonna shoot sunshine up your ass. i don't have the answer to what will get you to appreciate what you have and i'm not gonna pretend i do. all i know is i've spent plenty of time hating myself and i'm just glad i found this site where people understand. i hope to get to know more about you and others on this site bc we can help each other conquer our fears, sadness, and anger just by keeping up with each other. i don't think SH will do much for you tbh. i remember self harming when i was younger and all i ended up with is a few messed up knuckles. definitely regret, and feel stupid in retrospect for having done it. also messed up a wrist a few years ago and now it hinders my ability to even get core exercise which is a bummer bc execise helps more than anything when we can summon the will to get through those first few days of it. you know those days where you gotta FORCE yourself to get the exercise. then after that you start to look forward to it. eh, can't do anything about the past.
You sound like a lovely person. It's good to have this forum to release the valve a bit and describe our problems. There's nowhere else like it. I regret the scars I have as it'll make it difficult in the future for swimming or beach holidays etc, and if the the slight possibility comes up that I actually find a partner who's that visually challenged that they'd find me attractive enough to date! To be honest, I feel lonely. I am nearly 40 now with no kids or relationship. It feels like people are pointing at me and laughing. I am a total embarrassment and pathetic. I apologise for my whining! x
 
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always thirsty

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 12, 2020
Messages
125
Location
colorado
i hear ya!! sometimes i think all my past girlfriends must have had serious issues to be with a guy like me. in most cases they did 😆
 
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george81

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2019
Messages
209
Location
UK
i hear ya!! sometimes i think all my past girlfriends must have had serious issues to be with a guy like me. in most cases they did 😆
I'm so sorry you feel like that. It;s really hard when people tell you to take no notice when people are nasty about you. How can you forget what they've said? It plays on your mind all the time, it constantly echoes in your mind. Every word stings like being slashed with a knife. Over and over, criticism and bad comments. You want to hurt yourself because that's what they want to do, you do it for them. Sorry x
 
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always thirsty

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 12, 2020
Messages
125
Location
colorado
you in england huh? i guess you waking up around now. you guys like them beans and eggs, lol. how you doing man?
 
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george81

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 21, 2019
Messages
209
Location
UK
you in england huh? i guess you waking up around now. you guys like them beans and eggs, lol. how you doing man?
Hello there, still miserable today but glad my birthday is over as I dread it every year! Am so worried about gaining weight and I think it's down to drink so tonight I'm trying to cut it back drastically and feeling pretty empty to be honest! Hope you're having a better day, I'm in England and we certainly like our full english breakfasts! Beans, eggs, sausage, bacon, plum tomatoes, toast and tea lol.
 
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