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Returning to work AAUUGGGHHHH

N

Nutter_09

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 11, 2009
Messages
136
Location
Middlesex
:mad:

Hi all,
I am really struggling with returning to work. Been off since April after being signed off with depression, I decided to leave completly as it was unfair to the company.
I am very much in trouble with money now, family will not support me any longer. I applied for incapacity benefit but its so complicated and I do want to return to work.
I applied for 2 jobs, and got both, I started one, but when the day came I was in such a state I called and made an excuse - I managed to go in the next day but It was awful. I felt so anxious and panicky I gave in and didn't go back.
No one understands why I find it soo difficult. Interviews I am okay with, but its the fear of actually starting.
I had an interview lined up for today but after getting in a rite state last night and hardly any sleep - I gave up and didn't go.
I have signed up with a recruitment company and they have been calling and calling, arranging interviews and I feel like im under soo much pressure.
 
S

schizolanza

ACCOUNT CLOSED
Joined
Sep 22, 2008
Messages
3,160
I'm no good at interviews.
At least you are and can get a job in this recession.
I'd return to the GP and explain how things are.You shouldn't have to work if you cant.
 
S

*Sapphire*

Guest
Hi Nutter, if you feel you can't work because of your problems and that you would be eligible for Incapacity Benefit then I would apply if you can. If you are having difficulty with any forms, can you not ask a health worker, cpn, social worker to help you? Mine have always been prepared to help me, I believe they are very used to it.

If you want to work but you are feeling the pressure from recruitment companies then I would advise them not to call you. Why don't you ask that they email you instead. That way you can review jobs as and when you feel ready, with no one pressuring you on the phone. Just tell them that you will not answer their calls. Using a recruitment company can be stressful, the consultants get very eager to fill a job and will try every thing they can to get you to interview or accept a job. I know this because I used to be a recruitment consultant for many years and saw it happen!

In fact because of this knowledge I have refused to use a recruitment company! I think in some ways using a recruitment company has its down falls in this climate. There are so many people looking for jobs, that companies are often inundated with direct applications, and if they had a choice between accepting two people with the same quals/experience, one person through an agency, or another who applied direct, they would prefer to recruit the one who applied direct so they can avoid paying the agency fee (which can be thousands of pounds!).
No only that but sometimes I have accepted a job I did not really want because of the pressure the agency put me under, and their ability to sell it to me when I knew it was not really the job I wanted after all. I'm not sure if that is true for you?

With regards to anxiety starting a job, yes this is something I have experienced. However one thing I learned is that the more I tried to hide my anxiety from them, the worse it got. So straight away I now say to them, "you must bear with me, I am quite nervous and anxious, obviously meeting lots of new people, being a in a new environment and getting used to a new role." Everytime I have done this, the people have been so lovely, many of them say "of course you will be anxious, don't worry!". And they do their best to put me at ease. Many of them can relate to it, and sometimes on the first few days they have allowed me to leave slightly early so that they are not overwhelming me with information.

I hope you manage to sleep better tonight. :)
 
KP1

KP1

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Apr 4, 2008
Messages
1,500
Hi N it does sound as if you are not ready yet to go back to work have you got someone you can talk it through with. Perservere with the benefits claim I'm going through the same thing at the moment and its so frustrating.
KP
 
N

Nutter_09

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 11, 2009
Messages
136
Location
Middlesex
Thanks everyone,
I had a counselling sesh tonight - I just feel so down and helpless today. I really want to start working again and get mack to "normal" but I also know that deep down i am obviously not ready. Its so hard for others to understand thou. My family, my boyf and his family wonder what is going on in my head. My counsellor says one thing, and my mum says another - she is determined that I am not depressed - everyone has ups and downs. I asked her if she thinks that the doctors and counsellor are all liars then.
I just don't know how long I can keep going - I found myslef looking up suicide - so i quickly came here. Not good really.

Anyway thanks agaon.
 
yakuza

yakuza

Well-known member
Founding Member
Joined
Mar 20, 2008
Messages
812
Location
Edinburgh
Hi Nutter09,

Sorry to read you are going through a tough time at the moment.

On the work front I wonder if trying part-time work may be an option for you?
I know you have mentioned money problems and maybe you need to have a full-time income at present but if it's at all feasible I would consider part-time work just to get yourself slowly back into the swing of things.

I found myself going through a similar situation to yourself some years ago with my family not understanding what I was going through,it can be very distressing but please persevere with the counselling sessions if you can as I am sure it will only help you in the long term.

Good luck with everything. :hug:
 
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