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Return colors of life

J

JustAUser

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How to return colors of previous life back? Without drugs and other shit.
I walked on the street today and felt so bad... Also slight paranoia...
 
babyblue22

babyblue22

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Jan 23, 2019
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When life looks bleak to me I think about what life would be if I could hold my son. Rainbows & sunshine will always follow thought of him for me.
Maybe you have someone you miss too?
I get slightly paranoid too, the more I go out the better it gets xx
 
J

JustAUser

Active member
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Messages
43
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When life looks bleak to me I think about what life would be if I could hold my son. Rainbows & sunshine will always follow thought of him for me.
Maybe you have someone you miss too?
I get slightly paranoid too, the more I go out the better it gets xx
Yeah thats true... I have schizo from drug abuse. Still think that people want to do harm to me... I lost almost all my 'friends' . Only a couple stay with me. This helps me a lot...
But the way i think is changed forever. My illness changed me in a bad way. That is what makes me very depressive...
 
babyblue22

babyblue22

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Unfortunately there are people that want to do harm to people! People can be bloody evil.
I have auditory hallucinations which are hard to deal with and add to my paranoia. Accepting a diagnosis can be stupidly hard but you will learn to live with it & hopefully control it more one day. Sending hugs ❤
 
M

Marianda

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How to return colors of previous life back? Without drugs and other shit.
I walked on the street today and felt so bad... Also slight paranoia...
Im desperately trying to return colors back to my life. Im at one of my lowest point. I hope this mental state "passes". The problem is that I have to be taking alprazolam during the day. Otherwise I start thinking about ending it all.
 
babyblue22

babyblue22

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Im desperately trying to return colors back to my life. Im at one of my lowest point. I hope this mental state "passes". The problem is that I have to be taking alprazolam during the day. Otherwise I start thinking about ending it all.
All we can do is try ❤
I’m on diazepam all the time to stop me from harming myself until my referral comes through. Almost to just numb me until they find a fix. I’m lucky to have my animals which help, I’m like a crazy bunny lady 😂💋
 
M

Marianda

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All we can do is try ❤
I’m on diazepam all the time to stop me from harming myself until my referral comes through. Almost to just numb me until they find a fix. I’m lucky to have my animals which help, I’m like a crazy bunny lady 😂💋
Thanks for answering. I feel so bad when I have to take alprazolam during the day. I feel like a failed. But it's better failing than doing something stupid. When I started my first job many years ago, I use to take 3 alprazolams a day. Many years have passed and Im still alive. Right now the problem for me is that I feel I completed my cycle in this planet. I feel I have nothing else to do here. I loved working in my carreer but now they only hire young people. So what can I do? I also need an income.
 
babyblue22

babyblue22

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Thanks for answering. I feel so bad when I have to take alprazolam during the day. I feel like a failed. But it's better failing than doing something stupid. When I started my first job many years ago, I use to take 3 alprazolams a day. Many years have passed and Im still alive. Right now the problem for me is that I feel I completed my cycle in this planet. I feel I have nothing else to do here. I loved working in my carreer but now they only hire young people. So what can I do? I also need an income.
It’s much better than doing something stupid or extreme!
Don’t take this the wrong way at all but it seems like you are stuck on living to work instead of working to live?
I have done many jobs that I hate but it never mattered because I was only there to get money to live, do things & try to find small moments of happiness to make sure I kept trying x
 
M

Marianda

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It’s much better than doing something stupid or extreme!
Don’t take this the wrong way at all but it seems like you are stuck on living to work instead of working to live?
I have done many jobs that I hate but it never mattered because I was only there to get money to live, do things & try to find small moments of happiness to make sure I kept trying x
Thanks. You made a great point. In fact, It looks like Im stuck on living to work. I just realized that. The issue is that I am very active. I need to occupy my mind in something to avoid negative thoughts. I"ll keep trying to overcome this darkness looking for other things. I cant give up.🙏
 
babyblue22

babyblue22

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Uk
Thanks. You made a great point. In fact, It looks like Im stuck on living to work. I just realized that. The issue is that I am very active. I need to occupy my mind in something to avoid negative thoughts. I"ll keep trying to overcome this darkness looking for other things. I cant give up.🙏
All you can do is keep trying, plenty of jobs / activities to keep your mind active. Sending hugs ❤
 
J

JustAUser

Active member
Joined
Apr 28, 2021
Messages
43
Location
Europe
Unfortunately there are people that want to do harm to people! People can be bloody evil.
I have auditory hallucinations which are hard to deal with and add to my paranoia. Accepting a diagnosis can be stupidly hard but you will learn to live with it & hopefully control it more one day. Sending hugs ❤
Thanks, babyblue. How are you doing ?
 

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