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Relationships and Love.

T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
Hello everyone ๐Ÿ˜Š
My story is pretty complicated so forgive me for the length of this message ๐Ÿ˜‚
So 3 years I meet this wonderful guy, he's schizophrenic having been diagnosed years previously he's 31 now, I am 25.
We've been together ever since, we've travelled together, we live together, we're like the best of friends. I fell in love 4 months after meeting him and he had a lot of interest in me and always tried his best to make me happy. We worked well together. Our first summer we had together was the best time of my life and he told me he loved me.We definitely had our problems but we always managed to work through.
He however he said he always felt confused in his feelings about me and our relationship. Which completely destroys me.
He has started to slowly wean himself off his current medication which he was advised to do by his Doctor.
I feel this has slowly made our relationship confusing for him and in turn his feelings are getting mixed up in the process. I'm always here for him as he is with me. On Friday he told me that he has no love for me and never had. He cares for me and has feelings but it's not enough. We are the bestest of friends. As anyone can imagine this is crushing. I love this man very much and I always imagined that I found my soul mate.
My question is does medication mess up people's feelings during relationships or even friendships?
He told me a few times that he loves me in the past but revealed that he thought it was love.
I'm devastated and would love some opinions on this ๐Ÿ˜Š
Thanks a million!
 
D

Default12259

Guest
It can do. I have just been reading an online discussion about it from people who have had the same experience.

Sorry to hear of what's happened. I don't know what else may help, but hopefully someone will be along who has experience or advice to offer.
 
T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
Thank you for your reply ��
I really hope so too! ��
Could you possibly send me the link to this?
I'm interested in other people's experience with this.
 
L

la femme folle

Guest
Hello everyone ��
My story is pretty complicated so forgive me for the length of this message ��
So 3 years I meet this wonderful guy, he's schizophrenic having been diagnosed years previously he's 31 now, I am 25.
We've been together ever since, we've travelled together, we live together, we're like the best of friends. I fell in love 4 months after meeting him and he had a lot of interest in me and always tried his best to make me happy. We worked well together. Our first summer we had together was the best time of my life and he told me he loved me.We definitely had our problems but we always managed to work through.
He however he said he always felt confused in his feelings about me and our relationship. Which completely destroys me.
He has started to slowly wean himself off his current medication which he was advised to do by his Doctor.
I feel this has slowly made our relationship confusing for him and in turn his feelings are getting mixed up in the process. I'm always here for him as he is with me. On Friday he told me that he has no love for me and never had. He cares for me and has feelings but it's not enough. We are the bestest of friends. As anyone can imagine this is crushing. I love this man very much and I always imagined that I found my soul mate.
My question is does medication mess up people's feelings during relationships or even friendships?
He told me a few times that he loves me in the past but revealed that he thought it was love.
I'm devastated and would love some opinions on this ��
Thanks a million!
I find it hard to feel much on meds anyway. For me coming off them led to me splitting with my partner too. But in my case I think it was for the best. I suddenly felt like my emotions (and libido) went through the roof. I would watch that he isn't experiencing psychotic symptoms. It might be that things are clearer off the meds as they do fuzz your thinking up, but then it might be that he is ill. Has he been on the meds for the whole of your relationship?

It really depends on the individual. Some of the things I thought about love when I was psychotic were completely crazy, but for the first time in years I could laugh and cry properly. Everything 'suddenly made sense', lyrics of songs had much more meaning, I was convinced I was more intelligent, but I was still psychotic.

So it is likely the meds, it's hard to know what's real and what isn't when you're psychotic. I don't think I was ever completely happy with my ex, but I was never truly happy because of the meds, I had a flat mood most of the time, I never knew if it was love or not. Then again I think people with mental health issues tend to overthink things, maybe he does love you. Only you and he can really know but meds are an issue, he needs to be careful that he doesn't reduce too quickly. There is a section on that in the psychiatric medications forum on here.

Good luck. :hug1:
 
D

Default12259

Guest
hi Tkath, will send you a pm. That's a good point that la femme folle made about whether he may be having some psychosis.

Also, it may be controversial to say it, but most doctors withdraw patients too quickly because it only has just been becoming generally known that it has to be done a 10% reduction at a time, or perhaps even slower and then hold for about a month. UK charity Mind confirms the 10% reduction. Will send you further details.
 
L

la femme folle

Guest
I had never had psychosis before, but they took me off 800mg to 0mg in 4 months which was too fast, the final 25% was too much too quickly. This time I am being more careful and doing it myself, more careful than the doctors would have been. It has gone much better. So I would be more careful than the doctors would advise, definitely.

It's not easy to come off meds and the longer he's been on them the harder it will be. :hug5:
 
T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
Hi Laura Femme Folle

He has been on his meds for around 5/6 years now. He also mentioned that he felt similar with his ex girlfriend but at that time it was different meds he thinks as he is not too sure.
I also wondered would he be going through psychosis, he actually has lost his libabo with me but not completely. He said he feels like a 'thing' before being intimate, however this has not been the case lately.
He also said that the meds makes his emotions feel dull constantly when he use to take them all the time, I'm wondering is this also preventing him from feeling the high that love brings?
Thank you for your story โ˜บ
 
T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
Hey Ice Blue.
Well I do also believe that is true but he is also on a low dose so I have been told of 200mg daily. Thank you ��
 
L

la femme folle

Guest
Hi Laura Femme Folle

He has been on his meds for around 5/6 years now. He also mentioned that he felt similar with his ex girlfriend but at that time it was different meds he thinks as he is not too sure.
I also wondered would he be going through psychosis, he actually has lost his libabo with me but not completely. He said he feels like a 'thing' before being intimate, however this has not been the case lately.
He also said that the meds makes his emotions feel dull constantly when he use to take them all the time, I'm wondering is this also preventing him from feeling the high that love brings?
Thank you for your story โ˜บ
Certainly that's possible, I don't know. How much has he reduced by? Different meds can affect people differently. Libido loss is common with psychiatric meds.

It could be psychosis. Have you suggested that to him? Certainly making a decision right now about your relationship would be a mistake under such circumstances. I probably did the right thing calling off my relationship but I could have done it more considerately and less suddenly. I wouldn't recommend making a decision like that when reducing meds to anyone. His head might be all over the place. Has he ever tried discontinuing meds before? Is he reducing to switch meds or to completely come off them? If he's done it before and felt this way when doing so it may be withdrawal symptoms. Symptoms experienced in previous episodes are warning signs of psychosis returning.

I hope this helps you.

Good luck.

:hug1:
 
N

naominash

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Location
North Carolina
I definitely almost cheated in my spouse while we were separated due to a spike in libido and psychosis. It can be a confusing time.
 
T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
Certainly that's possible, I don't know. How much has he reduced by? Different meds can affect people differently. Libido loss is common with psychiatric meds.

It could be psychosis. Have you suggested that to him? Certainly making a decision right now about your relationship would be a mistake under such circumstances. I probably did the right thing calling off my relationship but I could have done it more considerately and less suddenly. I wouldn't recommend making a decision like that when reducing meds to anyone. His head might be all over the place. Has he ever tried discontinuing meds before? Is he reducing to switch meds or to completely come off them? If he's done it before and felt this way when doing so it may be withdrawal symptoms. Symptoms experienced in previous episodes are warning signs of psychosis returning.

I hope this helps you.

Good luck.

:hug1:

Hi La Femme Folle.
He is just taking the same dosage of meds but just 2 or 3 days a week now. The doctor told him at the beginning in about 5 years he will need to come off this medicine so he started to reduce himself by only taking them when he feels nervous.
He actually doesn't like to talk about his illness much to me as I think he feels some sort of embarrassment. He has a great network of people and one particular man friend knows the ins and outs of my partners story as they are really good friends. I have talked to this man who did advise my partner to keep taking his meds.
No he has never tried before to discontinue his meds. I do notice my partner sometimes in deep thought. Like a constant state of thought. This has happened a few times and can last updated to a few days but if I can remember properly this would only happen when he hasn't taken his meds for a few days.
My partner is very sweet and caring, however I also noticed that he can be quite the opposite to this sometimes without meds and I know that he does not usually behave like that but I feel it is the lack of medication. Would this be part of psychosis too?
Thank you so much!
 
T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
I definitely almost cheated in my spouse while we were separated due to a spike in libido and psychosis. It can be a confusing time.
I believe it can be very confusing. But I'm not sure of the signs to look out for.
 
N

naominash

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Messages
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Location
North Carolina
My signs are impulsive decisions, mania, staying up all night, hallucinations, delusional thinking. Etc

My husband was patient. It hurt him but by hanging in there, he saw my better side again through sheer persistence.
 
T

Tkath

Member
Joined
Apr 18, 2017
Messages
15
Okay I will definitely look out for these.
I have never seen him in an hallucination but I know he does tend to overthink so it may be delusional thinking.
He can sometimes stay awake all night then sleep all day or sometimes a few hours sleep is enough for him.
What is the best thing I can do for my partner if these happen?
 
N

naominash

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Messages
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Location
North Carolina
Detach a little by not taking certain things personally. He may be saying one thing now but will he say that in a month? Give it some time.

Till then, just be positive and supportive.
 
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