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Really upset

ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

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Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
768
Location
California, USA
Hey guys,

Just when things were going smoothly in life, I get yanked right under my feet...I thought that I could keep the good momentum going. But, life has taught me a huge lesson. Nothing is constant no matter how much I wish for it to be.

The year was off to a great start and then it started to get really rocky. If you've been following me, I've been having constant arguments with my sister. But, even so, I still tried to have good days and not let the arguments overshadow the good things in life. My boyfriend had just proposed and not even a week of wearing my ring yet, my sapphire chipped. The ring wasn't insured yet. And now that I've finally got a job...I had a panic attack while driving to work on my second day! I was just getting so frustrated with making the wrongs turns every time I drove to and back from work (instead of driving for 30 minutes, I wind up getting lost and driving for an hour) and I just burst into tears and had to drive back home. I didn't make it to work that day. With the chipped ring and my frustration with driving, they just cycled me into non-stop anxiety. I couldn't sleep for 3 days and I finally had some sleep today. Sleeping pills don't even work on me.

I'm just flabbergasted. My job is only a 3 month internship, but even so, I'm worried I've made a bad impression. I did explain to my work place what happened and they seem understanding. But, I didn't plan to disclose my mental health or disclose so soon to them. I just didn't know how I would tell them or what I would tell them why I couldn't make it to work. It's just inexcusable for me. So now, I feel really vulnerable.

It just sucks that I can't speed up and move pass my anxiety when I want to...what makes it hard is that when I'm under an attack, I don't realize it until it's too late. By then, I haven't slept and my mind never gets a chance to reset. I thought I was dealing with anxiety better, and I think I am, but when it builds up to fast...I just can't keep up.
 
calypso

calypso

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That is awful for you. What has worked in the past? I only ask as you say you have made some headway with your anxiety. Its really terrible that you have to suffer like this. What meds are you on? Are they any help? I would suggest therapy to help you with techniques to sort this out.
 
Zackthemaniac

Zackthemaniac

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Im sorry you hit a rough patch. Like you said its inevitable in life you just have to accept in and not dwell on it and ride cycle out.

Im curious why dont you use gps to go to work if you're not used to it ?

Trying to force it is never a good idea. Instead allow yourself to feel the feelings process them and try to push them away naturally.

I hope you can get through it soon and just try to make a good impression when you go back !
 
ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
768
Location
California, USA
Hi Zack!

I did use a gps, but I still missed my turns and go in the wrong direction. I was driving to work on the freeway and once you miss a turn, you could wind up very far. I'm thinking of driving locally, but that means I'll have to drive through a canyon.
 
ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
768
Location
California, USA
That is awful for you. What has worked in the past? I only ask as you say you have made some headway with your anxiety. Its really terrible that you have to suffer like this. What meds are you on? Are they any help? I would suggest therapy to help you with techniques to sort this out.
Hi calypso!

I was in therapy, but because I started work. My schedule doesn't allow me to see my therapist. I have school Tuesday and Thursday and work the other days. I suppose I could see a different therapist, but it takes time to build a relationship with a therapist. So far, I have been able to handle small dosages of anxiety. But the problem is when everything happens too fast and too quickly where I cant recover. I have not been using meds as therapy was helping me.
 
calypso

calypso

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Meds aren't a cure and aren't everything. But they can help in a small way and I would suggest you think about that as a start. Then if they help, think about new therapy but with the meds helping you. I don't like most psych meds (I'm on three types) but they have their uses in some situations. My son had extreme anxiety which would hit him out of the blue and he was given beta blockers which are normally blood pressure pills, but they are used now for anxiety. He said that they worked very quickly and got the anxiety under control. Just a thought.
 
Zackthemaniac

Zackthemaniac

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Joined
Oct 16, 2019
Messages
1,250
Location
North Carolina
Hi Zack!

I did use a gps, but I still missed my turns and go in the wrong direction. I was driving to work on the freeway and once you miss a turn, you could wind up very far. I'm thinking of driving locally, but that means I'll have to drive through a canyon.
Well once you get used to turns you should be fine. No need to go out of way through a canyon !
 
ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
768
Location
California, USA
Meds aren't a cure and aren't everything. But they can help in a small way and I would suggest you think about that as a start. Then if they help, think about new therapy but with the meds helping you. I don't like most psych meds (I'm on three types) but they have their uses in some situations. My son had extreme anxiety which would hit him out of the blue and he was given beta blockers which are normally blood pressure pills, but they are used now for anxiety. He said that they worked very quickly and got the anxiety under control. Just a thought.
Hi calypso,

I will talk my doctor when I see her about my anxiety. I was given setraline just in case I needed it, but if I start to take it, I will have to continue taking it. I wonder if there is something that I could just take at the moment when a panic attack is going to happen. It's weird, I am handling anxiety better, but it's when it comes out of no where is when I can spiral out of control very quickly. But, most of the time I am in control of my anxiety and have enough time for my mind to settle down. Now that I started school and an internship, my mind doesn't have time to decompress and then I start to get insomnia. Thanks *hugs*.
 
ReverieAnxiety

ReverieAnxiety

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 3, 2019
Messages
768
Location
California, USA
Well once you get used to turns you should be fine. No need to go out of way through a canyon !
Hi zack!

Yes, fiance and sis in law says I just have to get used to driving. But, my problem was that I had no sleep and I couldn't continue driving because of anxiety. Unfortunately, this happened at a time when I was supposed to be excited about starting an intern and returning to school. And with GAD, everything seems much worst than it appears. I've just had a crazy year...never had enough time to recover from anything...truly one thing after the next. And my dad's death anniversary is this month...
 
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