Really struggling

[Amelia_L]

I don’t know what to do. I’ve been really low and it’s not getting any better. I can’t keep going.I tried things that normally help but nothing has touched this feeling. I feel like I’m drowning.

 

[lindyhop]

@Amelia_L Are you on any medication currently for depression?

 

[Amelia_L]

Yes. I have been for about 15 years.

 

[lindyhop]

I'm sorry you feel this way, it must be hard. Have you spoken recently with any medical professionals about how you're feeling?

 

[Amelia_L]

I spoke to my doctor this morning. He was sympathetic and suggested things like meditation or spending time outside or going on a waiting list for therapy. But none of those things have worked in the past,

 

[lindyhop]

I agree it seems a bit facile advice for feeling like you're drowning, especially after all this time. If there's anything you want to get off your chest, this is an excellent place to place it as people can relate and are helpful and encouraging.

Is there anything in particular that is stressing you out or contributing to your feelings?

 

[Amelia_L]

Nothing out of the ordinary. I’m always sad once Christmas is over but never this bad. My husband is great and keeps suggesting planning things to look forward to but I just have no interest. I don’t want to keep going like this.

 

[lindyhop]

It's great your husband is helpful but yeah the lack of interest is classic depression. I guess I will reiterate what others have said on this forum - it won't be like this forever but I would recommend getting your medication reviewed. Do you have (or used to have) any hobbies that could help?

 

[Amelia_L]

I do have hobbies - and usually indulging in these helps but right now I just feel no interest. The doctor said he’d call back in a few weeks to discuss my medication.
I have children and am so useless to them. I don’t want them to grow up with a mother like this.

 

[lindyhop]

I doubt they would want you blaming yourself for this though. You are ill and I'm sure you are giving your best.

Would it help to work through your emotions through music, art, journalling (theres a section on this site if this appeals) etc.?

 

[Amelia_L]

Thanks for the suggestions. I’ve started journaling- which helps I guess as otherwise I’d just have everything stuck in my head. I do like art and craft activities but have no motivation and don’t get much pleasure when I push through and do it.

 

[Sugold]

Perhaps wanting to get rid of your negative state or trying hard to get away from what you're suffering through is caging you in further in this. (don't misunderstand me, going through such a hard time is very difficult and something I wish for nobody!). but sometimes, if I tried to "get away" from what's causing me such suffering, I'd usually get pulled back in just harder and the negativity would increase more.

 

[candycane]

I don’t know what to do. I’ve been really low and it’s not getting any better. I can’t keep going.I tried things that normally help but nothing has touched this feeling. I feel like I’m drowning.

Have you tried talking to a Mental Health Professional,at all?

 

[Amelia_L]

Thank you for the replies. I have talked to mental health professionals in the past but, while it’s good at the time, nothing ever seems to “stick” if you know what I mean.

 

[Amelia_L]

Perhaps wanting to get rid of your negative state or trying hard to get away from what you're suffering through is caging you in further in this. (don't misunderstand me, going through such a hard time is very difficult and something I wish for nobody!). but sometimes, if I tried to "get away" from what's causing me such suffering, I'd usually get pulled back in just harder and the negativity would increase more.

I think I understand what you mean, but I’m not sure what I should do. I can’t carry on like this - I need to be better for my children.