Ready to die :(

B

blipsycat

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 12, 2018
Messages
89
#1
I have nothing to live for :( EVERYONE i EVER cared about lied to me and abandoned me :( my ONLY dream will never come true :( I'm ready to die :( Goodbye forever :(
 
C

Candy19

Guest
#3
I don't want this to become a repeat of the last thread
https://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/thread182533.html

If you want help, you need to listen and take in what other people are saying, if you want to achieve your dream you'll have to work on it instead of expecting someone else to hand it to you. The whole point of settings goals in life is to work on it, they are a long term thing.

I am sorry you are feeling suicidal again, as this seems to be happening on a regular basis you should maybe try talking to a therapist or someone as soon as you can. Maybe call or email Samaritans:
Samaritans |

As for your dream, like I suggested in your last thread, Wattpad is a good site to start and get advice from fellow writers.

The mentality you have of thinking people hate you isn't true, I think you just have high expectations of people, but that doesn't mean people don't care or aren't willing to help. It is just that we can't give you all the resources you need in life and for your dream, there are parts of life you need to be able to work on yourself to achieve what you want.

This forum is also still here for you for when you are struggling, but like I've already said you need to be willing to listen to us, instead of throwing things back in our faces
 
B

blipsycat

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 12, 2018
Messages
89
#4
I don't want this to become a repeat of the last thread
https://www.mentalhealthforum.net/forum/thread182533.html

If you want help, you need to listen and take in what other people are saying, if you want to achieve your dream you'll have to work on it instead of expecting someone else to hand it to you. The whole point of settings goals in life is to work on it, they are a long term thing.

I am sorry you are feeling suicidal again, as this seems to be happening on a regular basis you should maybe try talking to a therapist or someone as soon as you can. Maybe call or email Samaritans:
Samaritans |

As for your dream, like I suggested in your last thread, Wattpad is a good site to start and get advice from fellow writers.

The mentality you have of thinking people hate you isn't true, I think you just have high expectations of people, but that doesn't mean people don't care or aren't willing to help. It is just that we can't give you all the resources you need in life and for your dream, there are parts of life you need to be able to work on yourself to achieve what you want.

This forum is also still here for you for when you are struggling, but like I've already said you need to be willing to listen to us, instead of throwing things back in our faces
Wattpad is useless.

I do not trust therapists. The suicide hotline and the Samaritans are also useless.

On Monday night, H promised she would talk to me about story ideas on Tuesday. It is now Wednesday. H, of course, refused to fulfill her promises. :(

I just can't take it anymore. Literally every single person on the entire planet constantly abandons. It doesn't matter how nice I am, they will either just abandon me outright or possibly even worse, constantly lie about it for no apparent reason than to get a sick kick out of my disappointment. That appears to be the case with H.

Do you want to know WHY I didn't talk about suicide or depression last night? Because of H. I was gullible enough to think that maybe, just fucking maybe, somebody in my life would follow through with their promises and we'd get to talk later that night and I'd have a reason to not contemplate suicide.

And once again, I'm disappointed and more upset that ever because I was stupid enough to allow myself to believe another person's lies. But without that brief, naive moment of hope, is there anything to live for? As far as I see, no. :(
 
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C

Candy19

Guest
#5
Wattpad is useless.

I do not trust therapists. The suicide hotline and the Samaritans are also useless.

On Monday night, H promised she would talk to me about story ideas on Tuesday. It is now Wednesday. H, of course, refused to fulfill her promises. :(

I just can't take it anymore. Literally every single person on the entire planet constantly abandons. It doesn't matter how nice I am, they will either just abandon me outright or possibly even worse, constantly lie about it for no apparent reason than to get a sick kick out of my disappointment. That appears to be the case with H.

Do you want to know WHY I didn't talk about suicide or depression last night? Because of H. I was gullible enough to think that maybe, just fucking maybe, somebody in my life would follow through with their promises and we'd get to talk later that night and I'd have a reason to not contemplate suicide.

And once again, I'm disappointed and more upset that ever because I was stupid enough to allow myself to believe another person's lies. But without that brief, naive moment of hope, is there anything to live for? As far as I see, no. :(
You need to try and be open again to looking for a therapist, not all therapists you're going to trust and click with, but you need to keep searching rather than give up.

Like I've already said, you can't rely on other people to help you achieve your dreams, maybe H has been busy so couldn't get back to you, either way you shouldn't jump to conclusions like that...

Not everyone can and will always be there for you, people have their own life and goals to focus on, so you shouldn't take it so personally if someone for whatever reason isn't able to help you as much as you wish they could
 
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B

blipsycat

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 12, 2018
Messages
89
#6
You need to try and be open again to looking for a therapist, not all therapists you're going to trust and click with, but you need to keep searching rather than give up.

Like I've already said, you can't rely on other people to help you achieve your dreams, maybe He
has been busy so couldn't get back to you, either way you shouldn't jump to conclusions like that...

Not everyone can and will always be there for you, people have their own life and goals to focus on, so you shouldn't take it so personally if someone for whatever reason isn't able to help you as much as you wish they could
If she is "so busy", why did she make that promise to me in the first place? And she's not the only one, not by a long shot. All throughout my life, I've been lied to, and the ones lying to me ALWAYS express offense at the thought that I would hold them to their promises. Is it common for "friends" to just constantly lie and break promises to another? Am I being too demanding by actually expecting people to do what they say?
 
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Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Jan 4, 2013
Messages
8,577
Location
England
#7
Hi,
I'm sorry you are struggling, please see a dr. You need professional help.
Once your feeling better, maybe write some short stories. Don't give up on your dreams.
I'm here to listen.
Take care
 
B

blipsycat

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 12, 2018
Messages
89
#8
Hi,
I'm sorry you are struggling, please see a dr. You need professional help.
Once your feeling better, maybe write some short stories. Don't give up on your dreams.
I'm here to listen.
Take care
I can never write anything alone.
 
B

blipsycat

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 12, 2018
Messages
89
#14
Hi,
I see, I hope you find someone. Are there any writers forums?
Have you see a dr recently about your suicidal tendencies?
Take care
I have tried all the writer forums. Nobody will EVER help me under ANY circumstances :( i have no reason to live.
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

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Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
8,577
Location
England
#15
I have tried all the writer forums. Nobody will EVER help me under ANY circumstances :( i have no reason to live.
Hi,
Your feeling poorly right now and need to see a dr, do you have any other interests or hobbies?
 
B

blipsycat

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 12, 2018
Messages
89
#18
You will have to do the first step and do something yourself and also accept some responsibility... Until you constantly feel solely as the righteous victim and everyone else is guilty for all and everything is useless... you can't change your situation.

Try to stop pushing, see some nuances, not just "me vs. the world" in black and white... I know it must be difficult for you, but try... the blame game will keep you in the vicious circle loop...
I have done a lot :( I've spent TEN FUCKING YEARS trying to get a co-writer :( and nobody cares.
 
H

Helena1

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Forum Safety Team
Joined
Oct 11, 2014
Messages
9,807
Location
UK
#19
Wattpad is useless.

I do not trust therapists. The suicide hotline and the Samaritans are also useless.

On Monday night, H promised she would talk to me about story ideas on Tuesday. It is now Wednesday. Heika, of course, refused to fulfill her promises. :(

I just can't take it anymore. Literally every single person on the entire planet constantly abandons. It doesn't matter how nice I am, they will either just abandon me outright or possibly even worse, constantly lie about it for no apparent reason than to get a sick kick out of my disappointment. That appears to be the case with Heika.

Do you want to know WHY I didn't talk about suicide or depression last night? Because of Heika. I was gullible enough to think that maybe, just fucking maybe, somebody in my life would follow through with their promises and we'd get to talk later that night and I'd have a reason to not contemplate suicide.

And once again, I'm disappointed and more upset that ever because I was stupid enough to allow myself to believe another person's lies. But without that brief, naive moment of hope, is there anything to live for? As far as I see, no. :(
I don't think this sort of thing is lying, they are probably not on purposely deceiving you, more likely they forgot or just said Tuesday as an estimate not like booking a meeting with you.
Can you message them, they could have forgot.
 
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Zardos

Zardos

Well-known member
Joined
May 30, 2013
Messages
2,458
#20
I have done a lot :( I've spent TEN FUCKING YEARS trying to get a co-writer :( and nobody cares.
If you've lasted the last ten years without a co-writer.. Why can't you last another ten years ? Why kill yourself today ? Its a Wednesday...
 
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