B
butterflykisses
Active member
Haven’t received the official diagnosis yet. I’m starting to question though if I really have bipolar. I’m very convinced that it’s not ADHD or borderline or anything else that’s often confused with bipolar.
My biggest doubt is because of what’s happening right now. I don’t think I meet the criteria for a mixed episode, but it doesn’t feel like a pure depressive or pure manic episode. It’s like I’m depressed then sometimes show more signs of hypomania on top of the depression. However, in the past I have had episodes that met full criteria for hypomania and episodes that met full criteria for depression. But right now, I don’t really know what’s happening. It’s like I’m depressed most the day then sometimes in the evenings, I feel super agitated and frustrated for even being depressed so I come up with ideas and things to do that will make me feel more powerful, alive or express that increased energy. And then I get very irritated and want to hurt myself but then that sometimes turns into slight euphoria. But overall, it feels like depression is the main mood that I feel, and have felt for months now.
Does anyone else have feedback or have experienced something like this before?
My psychiatrist saw me last when I felt very manic-y but I don’t think she realizes that I feel mostly depressed right now. And I don’t even know how to explain it at the moment.
My biggest doubt is because of what’s happening right now. I don’t think I meet the criteria for a mixed episode, but it doesn’t feel like a pure depressive or pure manic episode. It’s like I’m depressed then sometimes show more signs of hypomania on top of the depression. However, in the past I have had episodes that met full criteria for hypomania and episodes that met full criteria for depression. But right now, I don’t really know what’s happening. It’s like I’m depressed most the day then sometimes in the evenings, I feel super agitated and frustrated for even being depressed so I come up with ideas and things to do that will make me feel more powerful, alive or express that increased energy. And then I get very irritated and want to hurt myself but then that sometimes turns into slight euphoria. But overall, it feels like depression is the main mood that I feel, and have felt for months now.
Does anyone else have feedback or have experienced something like this before?
My psychiatrist saw me last when I felt very manic-y but I don’t think she realizes that I feel mostly depressed right now. And I don’t even know how to explain it at the moment.