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Put in Hospital!

BlueBerry

BlueBerry

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I got put in the psychiatric ward in the hospital on Friday morning.

First day was terrible. I had nothing with me but the clothes on my back and there was nothing to do. I originally intended to just stick it out alone until I got back out, but I crumbled and had to call my family and tell them what had happened.
They were obviously quite worried and upset. I had never told them I was having any mental health problems before. It must have been really sudden for them to hear that I was suddenly in hospital.

I got really scared and lonely in here. The other patients in the ward seem really withdrawn and nobody talks to each other.
I had to talk to a psychiatrist yesterday and I really didn't like him. He seemed pretty confrontational and intimidating. He had a terrible bedside manner and I just didn't feel comfortable opening up to him. I get the impression that he thinks I'm scum. He seems to hate me.

My family arrived yesterday to visit me (Saturday) and I was allowed to leave the ward (but not the hospital) and we had lunch in the restaurant. They went back to my flat and got me lots of stuff like clothes, boots, shampoo and my laptop. I just got the wifi code from the nurses this morning.

I get another assessment tomorrow and maybe a diagnosis. Hopefully they'll let me out after that but I'm scared that they'll decide not to and detain me. Even the nice nurses here seem to treat me like I'm either dangerous or a complete idiot. I'm not even allowed to pour my own tea.

I miss being outside and I miss having the freedom to leave my flat and walk about town. Hopefully I'll be let out soon because I hate being stuck in here. :cry:
 
Kerome

Kerome

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Sounds a bit like my grandmother, she keeps getting pain attacks and going to hospital, and then my aunts and uncles end up having to collect the 'emergency bag' plus extra clothes and all the other things. She typically spends a week or two at the hospital, so I hope you are better off, it's not that fun.

Take care, let us know how it goes :hug:
 
Mister.B

Mister.B

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I just want you to know I have been thinking about you recently, wondering where you were.

Hopefully, you'll get used to the people.

And, I hope you get out soon. :hug:
 

MarlieeB

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Aww BerryBum

I'm really sad that you ended up in hospital but hopefully now it will be the start of getting some sort of treatment to get yourself better.

I'm sorry that they don't seem to be warm to you, hopefully as the day goes on they will start to get warmer towards you and hopefully you will see a warmer psychiatrist.

Just one thing though, it seems that they trust you to let you out of the ward with your family.

Were you sectioned or is it a voluntary?

Love you

xxxxxxxxxxx
 
BlueBerry

BlueBerry

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They didn't really give me much of a choice when they decided to put me in hospital. They took me straight there from the clinic where I had an assessment on Friday morning. They wouldn't even let me go to my flat first to pick some stuff up becuase they thought there was too much risk of hurting myself or other people.

I found out from the nurse on Saturday morning that I'm an "informal" patient and I could actually leave if I wanted to, though this would cease all treatment and I wouldn't get a diagnoses. They didn't tell me this on the first day I came which really annoys me. I spent all Friday thinking I had been committed.
 

MarlieeB

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Well I'm glad you are a informal patient but you are sticking it out to hopefully get some treatment.

xxxx
 
E

Emmarose35

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What a system we have in the uk hey - I wonder if anything has really changed since Victorian times ?
I mean I know it has - but in some ways I don't think it has --
What women wants that ....
But if u do get the support you need and it leads to brighter days then it seems a case of grin and bare it --
Not many things are forever and psyc wards arnt these days so that's a definite change
I wish u genuine health and a strength to get through ...
Every day is a struggle for many on the inside and outside in varying degrees-
Recovery is ours if we know how to speak up and look wide
 
AliceinWonderland

AliceinWonderland

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I'm sorry to hear this Blueberry, must have been quite a shock being so sudden, and not being allowed home for your things. Plus the shock it must have been for your family. I hope you start to have some better experiences with the staff in there, and you will have better explanations of what's going on. Hopefully it will the start of helpful treatment and support for you. Take care, I really feel for you, I remember what it's like being admitted when you are quite young and it's a whole unfamiliar territory.
 
SomersetScorpio

SomersetScorpio

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Sorry to hear that the hospital is not exactly a nurturing environment for you, Berry.
It must have been a bit of a surprise for you to find yourself being admitted, and also for your family.
I'm glad you've now got a few bits from home with you now, hopefully that'll make things a bit more comfortable for you.
I hope you're not waiting around too long and it's good for you to know you've got the choice to leave if you want to. :hug:
 
BlueBerry

BlueBerry

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I've got my assessment and review today with the psychiatrist. Hopefully I'll be let out today.

Problem is, I don't really want to be honest about the real severity of my problems because then its likely they'll detain me. I've got to try and tone them down a bit during the assessment so I can get out, though this will likely mean an inaccurate diagnosis.
 
Kerome

Kerome

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Are you sure? Honesty means the best chance of getting the help you need...
 
maybe.shes.a.wildflower

maybe.shes.a.wildflower

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I agree, get the help now before you do something you regret. X
 
BlueBerry

BlueBerry

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Had my latest assessment/review. I was a bit more honest than I intended, but I still find it incredibly difficult to describe all my symptoms and problems in words, so I think I've missed some stuff out by accident.

They're not wanting me to leave yet, Wednesday at the latest. The doc recommended I stay another couple of weeks, but I said no. I'll really go crazy if I have to stay cooped up in here.

He admitted to me that my case is a complicated one, and there are probably about 5 or 6 diagnoses I could fit into, so he hasn't diagnosed me yet. I thought this was quite wise on his part. A lot of psychiatrists just play join-the-dots with your symptoms for a bit then slap an easy label on you.
He seems to be considering some kind of mood disorder (Bipolar maybe?) and he seems to think OCD is likely too. I've never considered OCD before, so I haven't read up on it much. He says I show signs of obsessive thoughts and thinking which cause me a lot of anxiety and torment.

I told him that my dad's side of the family has a history of manic depressive illness and my dad was likely bipolar himself. The doctor nodded, as if he had already suspected this.

My sister was kind enough to remind me that we were both physically and emotionally abused by our dad when we were little and she's wondering if this could have anything to do with my current problems. This upset me a bit to be reminded of this. I've always remembered that our dad was very angry and unpredictable and treated us badly, but I've never thought to refer to it as physical and emotional abuse before. I forgot to mention it to the doctor though.

I might get put on diazapam again even though it didn't do anything for me last time and I'm going to get put on some kind of calming anti-depressant that might help my nerves, anxiety and anger.
 
Kerome

Kerome

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That seems about par for the course... I described a wide range of experiences to them, everything from a tremendous moment of transcendent energy when I jumped up out of my chair like being hit with a lightning bolt, to my body going off for a walk by itself, to a moment of musical exuberance when I ended up singing to a train carriage ful of commuters, to momentarily being able to mind control a pigeon, to weeks worth of voices, and what did they say? Psychosis NOS and a dose of Risperidone.

So if he is taking his time making up his mind that's a good thing, I suppose. At least he's giving it careful consideration.
 

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