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namburi77

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Apr 3, 2018
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#1
Hi,
I have a grown up son who is suffering from sever depression and refuses to see the doc., I need help to deal with him and bring him out of that stat it is almost 6 years he is in that state.
He feels someone in the computer trying to destroy his life.
Taking to him is too difficult thing as he gets agitated, angry, gripped with fear.
Just stared using OLANZAPINE hoping to calm his nerves.
Any one can help with some valuable suggestions.

thank you
 
Foxjo

Foxjo

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#2
Hi and welcome to the forum! :welcome:
Have a look around, you should find it helpful and supportive here.
Hugs
Fox
 
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BrokenToy

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#3
Hi namburi and welcome to the forum.

It sounds like a tough situation that you are in. You said your son is grown-up, but you don't say if he is an adult (18+) or if he still lives in your home. It sounds like a some of his problems are coming from whatever he is doing on his computer. Is he being bullied online? Perhaps in a game he enjoys playing?

If he lives in your home and you pay the bills then you are entitled to ask him what is wrong. If he gets agitated tell him you need to ask these questions so you can try to help him.
From what you have written here it sounds like he won't talk until he is forced into it which is not ideal.

If he still refuses to talk with you would you consider cutting him off from the internet for a while, or just threaten to do so? That is your leverage to help to get him to open-up to you and talk.
You can't help him until you know exactly what the problem is. I hope you can find a way to get him to explain exactly what is bothering him. I wish you both good luck moving past this.
 
Cazcat

Cazcat

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#4
Hi,
I have a grown up son who is suffering from sever depression and refuses to see the doc., I need help to deal with him and bring him out of that stat it is almost 6 years he is in that state.
He feels someone in the computer trying to destroy his life.
Taking to him is too difficult thing as he gets agitated, angry, gripped with fear.
Just stared using OLANZAPINE hoping to calm his nerves.
Any one can help with some valuable suggestions.

thank you
Hi, it can be really difficult when our relatives are unwell and don't realise it. I am assuming that a Dr has seen him to prescribe him the Olanzapine? I would certainly suggest that you talk to his Dr about your concerns and about his unusual beliefs regarding the computer if you have not already.

My husband has found Olanzapine very helpful in reducing his unusual beliefs and anxieties about them, he is also on an antidepressant (citalopram) too which he finds helpful. Something to be aware of is that Olanzapine is very sedative particularly in the early days and he may find that he sleeps a lot. It also tends to make you crave fatty foods and put on weight.

There is a good book that I read called "I'm not sick I don't need help " by Xavier Amador too that looks at helping people to accept help when they do not feel they need it. That book is based around psychosis but he has also written a book about supporting people with depression I think.
 
Last edited:
Cazcat

Cazcat

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#5
Hi namburi and welcome to the forum.

It sounds like a tough situation that you are in. You said your son is grown-up, but you don't say if he is an adult (18+) or if he still lives in your home. It sounds like a some of his problems are coming from whatever he is doing on his computer. Is he being bullied online? Perhaps in a game he enjoys playing?

If he lives in your home and you pay the bills then you are entitled to ask him what is wrong. If he gets agitated tell him you need to ask these questions so you can try to help him.
From what you have written here it sounds like he won't talk until he is forced into it which is not ideal.

If he still refuses to talk with you would you consider cutting him off from the internet for a while, or just threaten to do so? That is your leverage to help to get him to open-up to you and talk.
You can't help him until you know exactly what the problem is. I hope you can find a way to get him to explain exactly what is bothering him. I wish you both good luck moving past this.
I'm not convinced that attempting to force him to talk would be a good idea particularly if he is already feeling anxious and agitated and sounds like he is having unusual beliefs possibly of a paranoid nature regarding his computer. When my husband is in this state confronting him head on about it is the absolute worst thing that I could possibly do as it would damage his trust of me, make him feel more vulnerable and persecuted and in my husband's case this would probably escalate into fear, anger and aggression.

Whatever is going on in his head is likely to be 100% real to him. I find the best approach with my husband is to remain calm and supportive of how he is feeling whilst avoiding agreeing with his unusual beliefs.

If the agitation becomes aggression remove yourself from the situation and if necessary call the police and explain the situation. They can get him an emergency psychiatric assessment. Hopefully though the Olanzapine will start to settle things soon.
 
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