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PTSD & DEPRESSION giving me grief

missymoo

missymoo

Member
Joined
Jan 8, 2010
Messages
20
Location
California, USA
long ago I was diagnosed with chronic depression (after I got divorced). then I was involved in a terrible ordeal here in my home involving my roommate and a friend of ours (he was a mess mentally and a drunk and got drunk and tried to shoot my roommate and himself. I saved both of their lives by jumping in front of the gun and also wrestling him for the gun to keep him from killing her and himself (which he said he was going to do to himself). noone got hurt except me. I got fondled and kissed on, (but not fully raped), to be able to keep the bastard from causing anymore trouble, then the swat team got him and hauled him off. it was an all day ordeal. very not cool :cry:

so....many flashbacks later, lots of crying, anger outbursts, misery, etc. I finally drug myself to a therapist some 9 months after it happened and was then diagnosed with PTSD by her. then she decided to re-victimize me by putting me down during a visit (and to think that victims of crime paid for that). :mad:
so now I am getting MUCH worse mentally, in addition to all my problems and misery, I am poor (I am a caregiver - dont make much doing that for one person), live in a condemable small home (I am trying to find a place to move to), my roommate (also a woman) has bi-polar and BPD (and she drives me NUTZ), and we have strangers come up in the yard alot and harass me, drive thru the private property even with all the signs up, and its always men who do it. It makes me afraid. to top if all off I am alone. I am the lovey dovey type that likes to have one special person to adore me as much as I adore that person, but I have only had 2 failed relationships and I am 37 years old.

I am lonely, depressed, sad, I have gotten totally introverted now and do anything to stay home/inside.
Its really hard even seeing family. I cannot even attempt to try to be with anyone that shows interest in me.
Yet, I wish I had someone to be with me all the time.
its hard :redface: I've seemed to have lost my faith in humans and even love to a degree. :cry:
.....and everyone keeps telling me to go see another therapist but if I was avoiding them prior to the bad therapist, I am DEFINITELY avoiding them now. :(

The only job I can think of getting is an at home job, but those are few and far between. I need a better income, but absolutely cannot even think of attempting to do a job search for a "real" job. much as I dont like the idea, I truly think I should be on social security, but dont know how to go about it.
 
Last edited by a moderator:
iffybob

iffybob

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 20, 2009
Messages
4,858
Location
England
ok

Yep go to your GP, get reffered to psych services.... they are not all idiots

To get benifits, go to your local job center, explain you situation, they will give you forms to fill in, fill them in and send them back.

Also if you dont claim housing benifits, go to the council office that does them and claim those as well if you rent.......

Take care ....... boB
 
missymoo

missymoo

Member
Joined
Jan 8, 2010
Messages
20
Location
California, USA
Thank you SO much Bob. :) It's deeply appreciated.
I will check into doing what you have said.
 
iffybob

iffybob

Well-known member
Joined
Oct 20, 2009
Messages
4,858
Location
England
just a thought

I was just thinking , if you dont know what council office to get housing benifit from the job center should be able to tell you that to.
 
D

dawnyb

New member
Joined
Jan 18, 2010
Messages
2
Location
leicester
Dealing with PTSD

Hi Missy moo and others.
To make a brief statement from a long story, in June 2007 my husband (now Ex Husband) attacked me out of the blue, following a short argument and tried to kill me. He was convicted of a lesser crime and received a community sentence. I suffered physical injuries and emotinally too. I asked my gp if i could see a counsellor as i thought this would help me (I dont have any real friends or family that I can talk to). I saw a regular counsellor then the servic changed and my counselling stopped in August 2009, restarting in November 2009 with a CBT specialist.
Its now January 2010 and last month they finally told me I have PTSD. I have to say that it was almost a relief as I have truly felt sometimes that I must be absolutely crazy, no one belived me etc. I am now having this therapy which is really tough going but it is helping a bit to realise that it is a real illness.
I have tried to come to terms by telling myself that PTSD is the brain's way of looking after you, you have suffered something unique to you, no one else in the world has experienced the exact same incident as you in the exact same way so your reaction is truly unique too. A good therapist will help you come to terms with this and it takes as long as it takes. Dont expect miracles and dont blame yourself. You will , in time feel better I am starting to now and do beleive that i will eventually start to lead a normal life again :grouphug:
 
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