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Psychopath seeking guidance (From diagnosed Psychopaths)

A

Aries40k

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I have not been officially diagnosed, and that is what I am seeking guidance on.

This was also posted in the introduction forum before I knew there were specialized sections within the site.

First a little background.
I have known from about age 9 that I was a Psychopath, and there was a very obvious pattern of behaviour up until that point.
I had daily detentions, and weekly (sometimes daily) parent meetings for bad behaviour. Pretty much everyone including the teachers also seemed to be creeped out by me, some could even possibly be classed as terrified.
It wasn't until I got caught shoplifting at 9 years old, and I got a very stern talking to that I wondered why my siblings never got "the talk" that I seemed to get almost daily. That's when I started to pay more attention and observe everyone around me and figure out why they were never in trouble like me.
This even ended up resulting in me doing things like spending hours each week just standing in front of the bathroom mirror looking at photos or videos of people expressing emotions and trying to copy them as best I could to try to be more like the other kids since I was getting sick of "the talk", and they never got it.
Fast forward to today, and I am very adept at reading people, mimicking emotions and facial expressions of almost every kind with generally no delay in my reactions to things so that no one can tell at all. The only time anyone has ever noticed anything was my wife when her mother died since that took me a good 10 seconds before my reaction since I had no practice for it and couldn't figure out what the hell to do, since none of my rehearsed responses seemed appropriate. In the end, I just came across as weird, but she didn't mind because she knows that I'm a psychopath and was just happy I tried.

A little addition
My wife is the only person who knows.

"The talk" is the usual rubbish of if someone did that to you, how would you feel.
Which just resulted in extra confusion for obvious reasons.


I have now been "diagnosed" by a Psychologist at my university. He and two others were doing research into people who fit a certain personality profile. I matched every single criterion and only volunteered because they were paying $100 per person, as I wouldn't have cared otherwise.

Their research involved getting me to fill out a questionnaire on a computer, watching some videos, and getting interviewed by the guy in charge (the psychologist) all while doing an EEG on me with that weird electrode cap.
They also later paid me extra to do the same interview but in an fMRI after their findings from the EEG.
It turned out I was the only true psychopath that had taken part in. So I also managed to convince them to double the payment for the fMRI version from $50 to $100 since they thought my brain was amazingly fascinating.
I also scored 39 out of 40 on their questionnaire and managed to freak them out by seeming completely normal during their interview, while showing no noticeable emotional activity in my brain. They also said something about my Amygdala being small, or underactive but I wasn't really paying attention so I don't know for sure.
He said that I am clearly a High functioning primary psychopath.
He then said that I should make an appointment with a different Psychologist who can make an official diagnosis and that I should then tell my friends and family.



This now brings me to my question.
Which is, is there any reason for me to actually get officially diagnosed, or tell anyone?

He was very determined that I should, but I cannot see any kind of benefit to me.
The only thing that I thought about it is that people like my doctor may be less likely to listen to me because I'm probably manipulating him (although surprisingly I never have).
Also, is there any reason that I should actually tell anyone? Since for similar reasons I cannot think of any benefit to it, only negatives.

So I would like to know if there are any benefits to being diagnosed or telling people and if there are any negatives. From people who have been diagnosed or told people about it and have experience with the positives and negatives of diagnoses and telling people.
 
Ras

Ras

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i am not a psychopath but have the diagnosis of ASPD, if you were to be diagnosed as a "psychopath" it would be under the diagnosis of ASPD since they dont really diagnose people under as being "psychopaths" anymore.
It is under my understanding that i got the diagnosis due to a previous diagnosis of conduct disorder when i was in my very early teens and due to other records i had, so as far as i am aware you cant just go in and get a diagnosis of ASPD just from a question sheet.
Curious though why would anyone even want that type of diagnosis? there are no benefits to it and it can be used against you especially if at court and whatever else like that.
And the thing is, people dont even know how to treat it, so there is not one benefit what so ever that would justify in my mind why anyone would truly want that type of diagnosis
 
A

Aries40k

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Ok, thanks Ras. Diagnosis or not I dont really care either way. But I didn't know if it would have any positives or negatives to it. The psychologist doing the study recommended it, but I dont know his motivation behind that.
It could be that he thinks it could help me, not that I'd accept any kind of treatment anyway, or it could be that he just wants me diagnosed in case I ever did anything illegal that it could be used against me, or so that I'm put on some kind of list or something, or maybe even just to help back up his research in some way, I have no idea.
Either way, all I could think of was negatives, since I don't know what the hell kind of positives there could be. I also couldn't figure out why he'd even care about being diagnosed or not, since I dont know how that would benefit him, or what kind of effect it would have for me.
I would have most likely been diagnosed with conduct disorder, but I was never taken to see anyone about my behaviour so I never was. My parents are great parents, but possibly a bit gullible for their own good and overly optimistic, mostly just thinking I'm just a normal kid who's acting out a bit.
 
Ras

Ras

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Ok, thanks Ras. Diagnosis or not I dont really care either way. But I didn't know if it would have any positives or negatives to it. The psychologist doing the study recommended it, but I dont know his motivation behind that.
I wouldnt trust a psychologist who is doing a study. Just take the money and think nothing else of it aye.
You said he said to tell friends and family. I wouldnt listen to that shit either. People dont handle that type of thing well and they put their guard up around you after knowing such things and basically from doing that, they lose any value you once seen in them. Probably the worst advice i have ever heard when it comes to this type of disorder.

Either way, all I could think of was negatives, since I don't know what the hell kind of positives there could be.
there is no positives. It has been used against me countless times ever since i got a diagnosis and there has been nothing gained from it on my part and believe me, i have searched endlessly to gain something from it.

I would have most likely been diagnosed with conduct disorder, but I was never taken to see anyone about my behaviour so I never was.
well i got it when i was locked in Juvie, again its another pointless diagnosis

My parents are great parents, but possibly a bit gullible for their own good and overly optimistic, mostly just thinking I'm just a normal kid who's acting out a bit.
You're lucky in that case
 
Twinkle Toes

Twinkle Toes

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This now brings me to my question.
Which is, is there any reason for me to actually get officially diagnosed, or tell anyone?
I wouldn't!!! I'm not a psychopath (as far as I know!) but have had MH issues all my life (and other physical issues)

Now physical issues are different, if you break a leg or have neuro symptoms you want to know how to get back to walking again and that's something entirely different with no stigma attached! People have sympathy and empathy for you! ..and even for sensory issues such as vision or hearing disturbances or loss.

I had diagnosis of autism before and was surprised about some people's reactions. some even treat me as if I had more severe learning difficulties than I actually had. (don't really have any other than my maths is shockingly bad and my ability to understand things from others viewpoints is practically missing!).

It was many years later I came across the concept of Multiple personalities and realised I had multiple alters and some had been coming out over the years. Anyway my point is I won't be telling anyone in my real life about 'the others' because my experience is people still don't understand and given that I already have a diagnosis of autism I expect that they will treat me like its 'in my head' or I've misunderstood and can't possibly understand something that complex!! (though I do have a degree so not really that 'learning disabled' academically!)

I don't think any 'others' would come out anyway the shrink would only see the 'medical host' whose job it is to deal with medical appointments and convince them we're normal apart from a few neuro issues, and who is blocked from remembering there is a system when they're in actual conversations with 'professionals'.

Financially we have enough income to live on from the diagnosed physical conditions and autism and already on the highest rate so telling them wouldn't result in benefits of higher income. so I see no benefit and have neither the patience nor inclination to go through more assessments and having to deal with more people. I don't consider it any one else's business, (my neighbours don't know I have autism - only immediate family) I don't expect to know the entire medical history of everyone else in my area so see no reason why they have a right to know mine!

so personally I'd keep it to myself if I thought I might be! (a psychopath)
 

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