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Progress

1

123roppo

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 23, 2018
Messages
74
Heyyy,
So I'm sorta asking advice and also updating u guys.

Last post I made was about my diagnosis and questioning it ect. I had some news from my care team, my consultant has basically said that I'm suffering from eupd and not a mood disorder. So I'm ok with that but he's said we can discuss it next time I see him.

I've since been making huge huge progress with my mental health.
I'm currently 2 months free from self harm. Me and my gp have agreed that I continue with this the next time I see him (2 weeks ish left) he will refer me to dermatology to help me recover from the scars.
I have also made massive progress with my medication. As of today I now manage my own prescription ,something over never done ever with my mental health due to risk of overdosing.
Mood wise I've been on and off but I have noticed a massive improvement this past two months. I'm having a lot more good days and the bad days are no where near as bad and are a lot more manageable. I've been doing a lot of self coaching, so been printing off resources to do a lot more reflection and working a lot on my feelings. I must say it's helped a lot, I used to think it was all pointless and just brushed it to one side, but it's amazing how much it actually helps putting things down on paper and just realising how small that particular issue is.

I'm looking to the future a lot more now too. Recently been passed on to a service to help with getting me back into employment and things like that. It's only early days but I think I'm finally working out where I wanna go with my life. The big thing right now is I was to use my experience with mental health and hopefully one day work I'm community services in some way shape or form.

Now advise wise.....

I'm not quite sure how to word this but I'll try. Tonight I've found myself getting really emotional over all my progress. Almost like I'm scared of it but also really excited about it ... Like all my emotions and feelings I'm feeling right now are all contradicting. I'm really really confused by it all. What should I do ?? Just let it happen and not think into it or block it out.... I've never really felt like this ever but for some reason it really worries me.

I also feel quit invincible right now. Like I could get away with anything if I tried.... I don't know if that's the manipulative side in me talking, but I genuinely feel like I could do anything and no one could stay or do anything about it. Again weird feeling I've never felt. Yeh I dont know
 
Lunus

Lunus

Well-known member
Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
1,009
Location
Norfolk
Heyyy,
So I'm sorta asking advice and also updating u guys.

Last post I made was about my diagnosis and questioning it ect. I had some news from my care team, my consultant has basically said that I'm suffering from eupd and not a mood disorder. So I'm ok with that but he's said we can discuss it next time I see him.

I've since been making huge huge progress with my mental health.
I'm currently 2 months free from self harm. Me and my gp have agreed that I continue with this the next time I see him (2 weeks ish left) he will refer me to dermatology to help me recover from the scars.
I have also made massive progress with my medication. As of today I now manage my own prescription ,something over never done ever with my mental health due to risk of overdosing.
Mood wise I've been on and off but I have noticed a massive improvement this past two months. I'm having a lot more good days and the bad days are no where near as bad and are a lot more manageable. I've been doing a lot of self coaching, so been printing off resources to do a lot more reflection and working a lot on my feelings. I must say it's helped a lot, I used to think it was all pointless and just brushed it to one side, but it's amazing how much it actually helps putting things down on paper and just realising how small that particular issue is.

I'm looking to the future a lot more now too. Recently been passed on to a service to help with getting me back into employment and things like that. It's only early days but I think I'm finally working out where I wanna go with my life. The big thing right now is I was to use my experience with mental health and hopefully one day work I'm community services in some way shape or form.

Now advise wise.....

I'm not quite sure how to word this but I'll try. Tonight I've found myself getting really emotional over all my progress. Almost like I'm scared of it but also really excited about it ... Like all my emotions and feelings I'm feeling right now are all contradicting. I'm really really confused by it all. What should I do ?? Just let it happen and not think into it or block it out.... I've never really felt like this ever but for some reason it really worries me.

I also feel quit invincible right now. Like I could get away with anything if I tried.... I don't know if that's the manipulative side in me talking, but I genuinely feel like I could do anything and no one could stay or do anything about it. Again weird feeling I've never felt. Yeh I dont know
First of all many congrats!! Absolutely fabulous progress you should be VERY proud of yourself. I’m not sure of your illness but it sounds to me as if you may have gone into Hyper Mode. Maybe search on it. Just be careful as it’s quite a comedown when you return to normality. If it is that I would advise you don’t act immediately on thoughts. Just try to calm yourself and think mindfully. I wish you well.
 
T

Tryin2gethelp

Member
Joined
Oct 6, 2018
Messages
15
It sounds like your making really positive progress, and my experiences are very similar, Lunus is spot on, for me, there is a trap, as i put it, when i feel like you seem to feel, when i first started to feel I was making real progress, I let my gaurd down, thats when I stumble, now i try to do the opposite, when i feel I am imune, I am wary of my inner critic. I write down my intentions but dont act on them, later, maybe the next day I look at them, and often no longer feel that acting that way would be helpful. I dont suggest that would work for anyone else, just that it works for me. Asking the question shows how well your doing.
 
1

123roppo

Well-known member
Joined
Feb 23, 2018
Messages
74
do i just carry on ?? or is there something i should be doing/not doing
im just concerned i should be doing something in order not to fail basically ??
 
T

Tryin2gethelp

Member
Joined
Oct 6, 2018
Messages
15
I can only say what works for me, i know its difficult, instead of looking at do or not, maybe look at it, as just being aware that an issue might exist, but its OK, its there, but its not a massive prolem, its just there.

It isnt somthing to fail on, its simply, just there. And knowing it is, helps me avoid it it.
If it helps, i see that as a hole in the road, if i can see it, im less likely to fall into it. there is no right way for anyone to see it, finding what works is most helpful, at least, it is for me.
 
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