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Procrastination

Ashami

Ashami

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Procrastination.

It plagues me!

I've tried every conceivable time management method I can find and yet nothing can motivate me into getting things done. I want to get things done and yet, I resist at the same time.

An interesting theory caught my attention the other day. It was claimed that procrastination is caused by being treated like a slave in childhood. The resentment a slave feels toward his master is played out subconsciously as an adult in the form of delaying tactics, doing chores resentfully etc..

Something struck a chord with me about this idea as I have an enduring memory of being made to wash up whilst my parents stood and took the p**s, and whilst my brothers sat and ate their dinner. I felt like a slave then and the daily washing up is guaranteed to bring out the slave mentality in me now. Suffice to say my partner gets to do most of it.

So;

Does procrastination affect anyone here?
Can anyone relate to the procrastination - slave theory?
Has anyone found a successful way of beating procrastination?
How can I learn to love washing up?

Grateful 4 your thoughts :) :tea:
 
sandybob

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thats interesting ...

i was gonna do my usual jokey response ... ("i'll answer this later " that sort of thing ):D

but that does actually strike a chord .. I'm the oldest of 4 (one brother 2 yrs younger .. sister born when i was 8 and youngest brother born when i was 15 ) I always felt like i was the second mummy .. i did the weekly shopping (with pram to fetch it back ) when i was 8 or 9 ... and particularly after my parents divorced (soon after youngest bro was born, it was expected of me to do the dinner, make coffee.. wash up etc ...

possibly another reason why my kids are lazy little b*ggers (i dont make them do anything much ) :rolleyes:
 
Ashami

Ashami

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Hi guys, thanks for responding.

I'd expand on the subject but...oh no, the crash I just heard coming from the kitchen must be that mountain of washing up I still haven't done, collapsing to the floor! ;)
 
Rambuie Perspecador

Rambuie Perspecador

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The axiom don't put off till tomorrow what you can do today gets reversed sometimes - and I sympathise - O did you hear THAT? It's my Greek kitchen with a Poltergeist celebrating time off for good behaviour. Anyway, have a smashing time - or buy some paper plates!
 
M

Michael

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Procastination - to defer action -

3 rd try

I just can't get the words out I want to say or feel, deleted this post now three times, will probably either delete this or just post it.
It matters to me what others think of me and what I post, negativity when its missplaced hurts like - well hell!

Michael
 
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Dollit

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Michael I think you're a great person. I once got told off by the consultant (in front of a group of students) for dwelling too much on the negative aspects of my personality. He quite rightly pointed out that balance is a matter of the negative and positive existing in our personalities in complementary amounts. Really easy to see when someone points it out. :hug:
 
singingdollydaydream

singingdollydaydream

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procrastination

:redface:I have found that I often think that if I have a good day and get lots done then I will miraculously feel better. In reality that`s not the way it goes. On days when I really can`t get motivated I feel so guilty and lazy that I retreat to my bed to escape the horrible feelings which then makes me feel even worse. Can anyone else relate to this? Would love to hear from you if you do. I really don`t have the answers to this one and it is probably the problem that gets to me the most as I have a family and feel like I`m letting them down. I do not have enough mental stimulation, would love to have a small job but just know I am unreliable so what`s the point in trying? Sorry, this has turned into an essay all about me, me, me!
 
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Dollit

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When I get depressed one of the things that is written in my advance care plan is sleep. I think it's a natural reaction to depression. When you're well you want to catch up on time you feel that's been wasted. Talk about yourself if you want - that's what the forum is for! :hug:
 
manic mini

manic mini

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hiya im afraid to say i seem to be totally the opposite i strive hard all the time in everything i do i find it hard to sleep and will keep going until i feel ive achieved perfection i never do of coursewhich then makes me feel inadiquate which then sends me down the road of uselessness unforfilment and pure hatredness for myself please excuse my spellings does anyone else feel like this
 
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Dollit

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Yes - that's why I had the directive written up to remind of me how I should be looking after myself and where I can turn for help. I am a perfectionist in certain areas (don't give a damn about the way I live though) - my doctors all tell me that it's a problem they see with high achievers all the time. Just tends to be magnified in me because of the bipolarity. :tea:
 
Ashami

Ashami

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Perfectionism is an interesting concept, and one that crops up a lot here. I often feel that it is my search for perfectionism that has made my ability to procrastinate so crippling. I don't accept anything less than perfect so anything else is failure and makes me not want to keep trying.

I find it interesting that, regardless of the specific MH condition there seem to be core commonalities which are expressed in different ways. For example, so many people with MH issues have insomnia, yet I sleep the sleep of the dead. Is the search for perfectionism a typical characteristic of someone with MH issues? It would seem to me the answer is yes. Does this derive from a feeling of never being good enough?
 
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Dollit

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Or perhaps we feel that we have more to prove than other people and feel that the bar is set so high we can't help but fail. I have to write reports as part of what I do and quite a lot they become part of official documents and I'm always bricking it when I submit a report until the boys get back and tell me that it's up to my usual high standard. I don't think I've had a report sent back for even the slightest amendment but I still feel I've got to prove myself. And this is with people who don't judge me on my MH and who love me.
 
Ashami

Ashami

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What fascinates me since I've been here is how intelligent people are here. It's fascinating because there is so much stigma in the media and the mere mention of depression let alone bi polar or schizophrenia and people think we are mad. There is a great fear of MH issues as there is, for example, with issues of childhood sexual abuse.

I felt I must be mad at one stage, to suffer from depression, but my opinion has changed completely. There are definitely people who suffer from a sort of 'madness' but I believe I've only met two, possibly three here who I have suspected were a little unhinged. Everyone else is incredible, I've felt quite humble since arriving.
 
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Dollit

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When I was diagnosed as bipolar I was told that it was one of the two illnesses that were categorised as madness when "active" but that I was also considered sane.

What I have noticed as well is that the less well-informed people on here pretty soon begin to become more informed and more confident of what is going on in their lives.

I don't feel that I have a duty to educate the populace on mental health but I do feel that if I don't prove that people with MH issues are among you everywhere and you don't even notice then somehow I'm letting myself down.

I'm being name checked by a final year architect student in a report because of my community work and local knowledge and he hasn't a clue that I've MH issues. When I do tell him (eventually) it will just be to prove that no one person has the right to write anyone else off (but in a very nice way because he's a lovely boy).
 
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