• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Pretty much ready to blow my brains out (not really)

DistantOcean

DistantOcean

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May 4, 2020
Messages
135
Location
Netherlands
I really want to blow my brains out right now. I stayed friends with my caretaker after she quit her job and she just ended our friendship while blaming it on the power differential, while she always talked openly with me about all her problems. Also I am disappointed in dating sites and Tinder. I barely have had even one single interesting long-lasting conversation. Most of the time I get blocked for seemingly no apparent reason or I stop getting reactions pretty soon and are left completely ignored. I also I sent multiple long e-mails to different content creators on Youtube which I really like who are all ignoring me (or at least for one month now). And all my parents seem to be able to do while I'm broken is stand there and sit with me. Which I can't really seem to appreciate. I don't even know what I do want them to do. And all the conversations with my many caregivers seem to be somewhat the same. I have an opinion or feel a certain way and they try to convince me otherwise. Sometimes I can see their point, mostly I don't. It all seems so pointless. It seems like I'm heading nowhere, my fate in mankind is beyond repair, and somehow I don't feel loved. I just feel alone and I feel lost.
 
Z

Zoe1

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Jul 8, 2019
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sounds to me like your parents do love you DistantOcean

standing or sitting with you in silence
is a very great expression of love
they probably dont have skills in mental health
and are desperately lost for words
and the only way they can show it is to sit with you

you will find friends here

:grouphug: 🎼 💜 🐢 🍀
 
DistantOcean

DistantOcean

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Joined
May 4, 2020
Messages
135
Location
Netherlands
thank you Zoe

you don't seem to need many words to say a lot
I particularly like: 'standing or sitting with you in silence is a great expression of love' -- would leave out the 'very' because an overstatement seems unnecessary here ;)

I also found some comfort in your emoticons
it makes me a bit sad that I don't know how to use them myself though
it is an interesting combination you chose
I especially like the turtle
would've preferred a red heart though
I don't know why

:grouphug: 🎼 💜 🐢 🍀
 
DistantOcean

DistantOcean

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May 4, 2020
Messages
135
Location
Netherlands
Thanks Midnight Phoenix,
I am happy I am able to share my inner struggles with a community of caring people
 
E

Elisante

ACCOUNT CLOSED
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May 16, 2020
Messages
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Greece
Dating sites are a joke, except if you are looking for an one night stand. Don't feel bad for people blocking you. I'm pretty sure you'll feel less lonely if you message one of your friends in this forum.
 
DistantOcean

DistantOcean

Well-known member
Joined
May 4, 2020
Messages
135
Location
Netherlands
sounds to me like your parents do love you DistantOcean

standing or sitting with you in silence
is a very great expression of love
they probably dont have skills in mental health
and are desperately lost for words
and the only way they can show it is to sit with you

you will find friends here

:grouphug: 🎼 💜 🐢 🍀
Zoe, I think I have found the red heart!
:grouphug: 🎼❤🐢 🍀
 
June Thaw

June Thaw

Member
Joined
Jun 7, 2020
Messages
7
Location
Nowhere
I feel the same. The longer I know with someone, the more exposed I become. I can't pretend and let it all out what is going on my mind. Some judges me and some left including my recent girlfriend. All of my trying, care and love might seem just I am so desperate for them.
 
OCDguy

OCDguy

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 13, 2016
Messages
1,801
I have an opinion or feel a certain way and they try to convince me otherwise. Sometimes I can see their point, mostly I don't.
Your opinion and points of view are valid, and yours. In my opinion only under certain circumstances should someone really try changing them. Although discuss and challenge them is probably human nature. I personally would love to hear your opinions, it's part of what makes us all unique. :)
 
B

Bet

Well-known member
Joined
May 3, 2020
Messages
54
Location
Nc
What do u mean by caretakers?
 
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