Poem on Vocies Written by myself

L

Loopylou83

Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Uk wales
I sit and ponder and wonder why

I have these voices and I almost cry,

they tell me things I don't want to hear

like your no good and you better off not being near



I want to do things I like to do

like paint the living room or ceilings too

they tell me im no good and ill get it wrong

I cant do nothing as im not that strong.



I go to work at CAB the only time they go away

I can relax a little and everything seems to be okay

the night time hits and here they come

I just need to take another Valium



I try and talk about what they say

but I know what people are thinking, as they tell me they will just go away.

They don't understand what im going through

if only they could here what I was hearing , if only they new.



Your no good at this, your no good and that,

your no good at helping people as your so fat.

I have to endure the criticism as that is what they do

they say it so very often, sometimes I believe it must be true.



I harm myself as punishment, to take away the pain

the voices tell me sometimes to do it but that's just crazy or maybe just insane

I see the [moderated] and I just want to cry

but what can I do when the adrenaline hits me, now on a high.



I see my mothers shadow sitting on the kitchen fridge

I look at her once or twice but I pretend not to acknowledge

she's the one who poisoned me with that nasty seed

even though you all turned around and disagreed



I catastrophist things all day long

scared of things in case they go wrong

such things like plastering on the wall

or putting up paper and down it will fall



My anxiety strikes me every day

I hope and pray it would go away

it starts to built up through from my toes to my chest

never do I ever get to have decent rest



I wish someone could see what im going through

so they could help me and care about what only I new

sit and listen to my to my words and help me when im sad

im really not that crazy and certainly not that mad.
 
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Z

Zoe1

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 8, 2019
Messages
1,250
Location
Nowhere
wow thats really stunning !
actually I dont ' hear ' voices as such
but that is how my thoughts go , telling me I'm weak
and that I will get it all wrong !
I did not even realise I was thinking that !

I definitely think you have a writing talent
there is an organisation for disabled writers
called Creative Futures, maybe they can help you get published

:hug:
 
L

Loopylou83

Member
Joined
Jul 11, 2019
Messages
11
Location
Uk wales
thank you very much zoe, dint think I was that good, it was just what was going through my mind
 
Z

Zoe1

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Jul 8, 2019
Messages
1,250
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really , it looks like you worked on it ! :hug:
 
J

jerseyguy77

Member
Joined
Dec 20, 2015
Messages
19
Really Good....powerful.....keep writing. I write quite a bit of poems about the voices to....it's a good way to "off-load" and vent
 
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