Pleasing others

[Tuto]

I am a very insecure person. Lately i have noticed that every time i speak with other people i always think what they want to hear. The only thing going inside my head is what is their next question and how i should answer it. Because of my insecurity i have no real relationships with anybody, being around people causes me great discomfort, because i can never relax. I have been trying to block out all the thoughts about what others want to hear etc. and just focus on myself, but its very hard to block all the thoughts you normally get. I don't know what i should do i mean i can't continue to live like this.

 

[silly madam]

Oh Tuto,

You really dont sound happy at all. Have you been to your GP about all this? I think you should consider it if you havent already done so. It might be the first step towards getting things sorted.
Best of luck.

 

[Tuto]

Oh Tuto,

You really dont sound happy at all. Have you been to your GP about all this? I think you should consider it if you havent already done so. It might be the first step towards getting things sorted.
Best of luck.

What is GP?

 

[silly madam]

GP is General Practitioner - your local doctor. Have you tried them yet?

 

[Tuto]

I have seen a shrink for the past 3 1/2 years and it hasn't helped me much. I am so fucking tired.

 

[Twylight]

Hello Tuto

It seems to be a ' Social thing ', because your writing what you feel and ' not trying to please us' - which is good

I was wondering if you have problems talking on the phone ?

Welcome

 

[Fallen Angel]

Hi Tuto,

I really do feel for you, I'm very similar, really insecure and I'm always worrying that I'll say the wrong thing and just try to please everyone, I can't even follow conversations sometimes because I am anxiuosly worrying about what to say next. Not really got a relationship with many people even though I try, I 'm on here most days so always happy to talk



Angel

 

[Tuto]

Hello Tuto

It seems to be a ' Social thing ', because your writing what you feel and ' not trying to please us' - which is good

I was wondering if you have problems talking on the phone ?

Welcome

Its not really a social things since this feeling i have never goes away. I have trouble reading, sleeping etc. I don't feel talking on the phone is as bad as meeting people face to face, but in general i always feel bad. I just don't have the energy any more to go on.

 

[Fallen Angel]

Hi Tuto,

Sorry to hear you are still feeling low, is there anything you do in your life that does bring you some peace or helps you focus? I get lost in drawing sometimes its the only time my head will rest. Would it be worth contacting your doctor or arranging to see your shrink? Maybe its time to reassess your treatment if things are not improving? Hang in there!

Here's a big

 

[Tuto]

Hi Tuto,

Sorry to hear you are still feeling low, is there anything you do in your life that does bring you some peace or helps you focus? I get lost in drawing sometimes its the only time my head will rest. Would it be worth contacting your doctor or arranging to see your shrink? Maybe its time to reassess your treatment if things are not improving? Hang in there!

Here's a big

I have been in this situation for so long and tried so hard that i don't anything can give me peace of mind. Id rather just kill my self than continue live this kind of life.

 

[jamesdean]

Hi tuto sorry to hear how difficult things are for you now I mean I prayed last night hoping that my life would soon be over and its an awful feeling to want to die but sometimes it s the way people treat mental health conditions often we cannot see the abuse that is going on in our minds if all that makes sense I'm not so sure it isnt all a bit mixed up.Take care Jd

 

[Fallen Angel]

Hi Tuto,

I hope you can get passed these feelings and keep posting! I've felt that way so many times i've suffered from OCD for 15 years and become so tired of it, but theres always something to hang on for, there really is, even though i know it might not feel like it right now there is! we are all here to support you! Just keep posting what ever you feel or need to say!!

even bigger


Angel

 

[Tuto]

Hi tuto sorry to hear how difficult things are for you now I mean I prayed last night hoping that my life would soon be over and its an awful feeling to want to die but sometimes it s the way people treat mental health conditions often we cannot see the abuse that is going on in our minds if all that makes sense I'm not so sure it isnt all a bit mixed up.Take care Jd

I used to feel the way you do, but tell you the truth these days thinking about death relaxes me. When I feel my life is over and i have nothing to lose all of the sudden many of my social fears go away for a tiny second. Anyhow i will probably kill my self at some point. I am just too disappointed about my life and it probably won't get much better. People die every single day, some of them younger than i am and its no big dead. We all die at some point, if this life isn't worth living then why not make it end a little faster?

Don't get me wrong i am not planning on killing my self currently, but i think i am constantly moving towards it and for example today i don't feel the least bit sad or bad about it.

 

[dunty]

Hey Tuto!
I can completely relate to how you feel and the way you think. I often talk to people and talk about life as though I'm searching for credit by telling them what I think they want to hear. It makes me think I've been 'honest' but on reflection I feel trapped by what I've said. When on my own I obssess about it and think of how I could have said it differently to represent myself more accurately. It leaves me feeling hopeless like I don't know myself anymore.
I feel the same way too sometimes. As though I can comprehend death and that it would be 'easier' to deal with it now but totally agree with fallen angel - there's always something to carry on for.
Have you tried writing down your thoughts and feelings? There's a good page on the bbc website: http://www.bbc.co.uk/health/conditions/mental_health/coping_thoughtdiaries1.shtml with thought diaries. When I write things down myself, sometimes it helps to know I'm at least dealing with helping myself which gives me hope. Also, it is sometimes a relief to just write them down, sometimes helps you relax into yourself. Exercise can help too.
Hang on in there Tuto, your not alone.
Is there anywhere you feel you don't have to worry about what people think? Family/close friends?

Safe