• Welcome! It’s great to see you.

    If you'd like to talk with people who know what it's like

    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Please, please read... never give up... you never know what's coming your way

T

Timmy86

Member
Joined
Jun 10, 2010
Messages
17
Location
Galway, Ireland
Please, please read... never give up... you never know what's coming your way

Hello there, my name is Timmy. I'm 23 years old, and suffered from depression for around five years. And I am getting married next Friday.

23 years old? Pretty young to be getting married some may say. But the time is right, I've never been so sure of anything in my life. I've been through some of the toughest moments anyone can experience, and thought about giving it all up. But everything changed when I found the most beautiful woman on this planet, and my life could not be any better right now.

In early 1999, my eldest brother was tragically killed in a construction related accident. My world came crashing down that day, and in spite of having loving parents, two brothers and a sister, I felt my life was over. He was my idol, my best friend, my inspiration and everything I aspired to be. A nice guy, a popular guy and my favourite person in the world to talk to. Now he was gone forever more, and at just 20 years of age. At the age of 12, I had met death in all it's unforgiving nature, and for the next five years, my life was one misery after the next.

I turned to drink at age fifteen. And boy how I did drink. It gave me a release, it told me everything would be okay. But the day after my demons were greater than ever, and multiplied with every session. The only answer was to drink more, temporary as that answer may be.

By late 2003, I was in the pits. It was coming up to my brother's fifth anniversary, something I couldn't get my head around, and I still hadn't dealt with it. Nor was I prepared to. I had so much going for me... I'm told I'm a very good looking bloke, and I had every girl after me. I got on well with everyone. And yet, I felt so empty. I was fully prepared to take my own life... when a miracle came my way.

I'd known Katie since I was about five, and we'd been best friends for as long as I can remember. I always saw her as the most beautiful girl I knew, but it never crossed my mind to be with her. I thought she saw me as a brother. But on one particularly awful night for me, she changed my life.

I received a text. She told me how she felt about me, how she wanted to be with me. And all my Christmases came at once.

We shared our problems, of which she had many. She too lost a sister, to cystic fibrosis. I was gentle with her, I comforted her, and she did the same for me. We helped each other, cried together, laughed together. And I fell madly in love with her.

But at age 18, we got some shocking news. Katie was pregnant. And so, we began to worry again, but this time we had each other. I worked tooth and nail for those nine months, shuffling no less than three part time jobs. All I did was work, and worry about how we would provide for a child. The child itself, nor the joyful expectancy, never came into my mind.

Nothing prepared me for how ground shaking a moment it would be. On the 2nd of December, 2006, Katie presented me the most beautiful little girl. My heart almost melted when I got to hold Chloe for the first time, said hello, and took her tiny little hand in mine. Then it hit me: she was my daughter. I was a daddy. This was my flesh and blood. She would always be beautiful to me just the way she was. And no matter what she did, no matter how much I would disapprove, I would always, always love her.

Thanks to my parents, me and Katie got the support we needed, and both went through college, as they took care of Chloe. Every second I thought of her, and weekends with her were like heaven. No drink in the world could hold a candle to giving her her bottle, changing her nappies, giving her baths, making her laugh, and putting her to bed. My little girl grew older, and learned to walk and talk. Coming home with Katie on Friday evenings, seeing her run to the door and into our hugs made every ounce of suffering go to the back of my mind. And when, for the first time, she said 'I love you Daddy'... well, my life had gone full circle.

And so, me and Katie have well paid jobs now, and live together with our three year old girl. I couldn't be any happier right now. I owe it all to the two most important girls in my life.

My advice? Please, please, don't take the ultimate step. All you leave are problems. You never know what's just around the corner. And you never know when you'll be as lucky as me, writing as a father, and a husband in waiting.
 
BORTU

BORTU

Well-known member
Joined
Jun 4, 2010
Messages
1,449
Location
SW England
Timmy,

Yes I read it. It is nice to know you are happy now. Really, the best of luck to you. It is a light of hope to all of us.
 
greebobeebo

greebobeebo

Well-known member
Joined
Aug 3, 2009
Messages
1,027
Location
north norfolk
What an awesome life you are living now. You are lucky that you found true love. I know my boys help me stay grounded and I certainly would never leave them motherless. I lost my Dad nearly 5 years ago and I had a very unsympathetic OH at the time, as a consequence I am now dealing with his death. I am no longer with my OH so I have the time to heal.
 
S

*sapphires*husband

Guest
beautiful story and one that sounds like a similiar journey I am just about to embark on, i hope
 
M

maudikie

Guest
Al best wishes. You hae the basis for a good and long elationship. Give Chloe a big kiss from me.
 

Similar threads

Top