new to the forum, I recently went through something that caused me to take stock of my life and made me realise what an awful person I have been, I have made some terrible terrible mistakes and had some awful, unforgivable thoughts during my life. I don’t know why I did the things I did or thought and I am so ashamed that I don’t think I can live or deserve to live anymore. On top of this I am causing my wife and family to suffer with they way I am now as I am severely depressed and they don’t deserve this suffering even though I do. Will it be enough to try and be a better person moving forward? I don’t think I can redeem myself but is it worth trying? I have so many regrets and I also regret that I never realised earlier and changed my ways before this. I am haunted by it all and just feel like I can’t move on or deserve to move on. I just want to erase it all. I feel like no matter how much medication or therapy I do this will never go away. I just want someone to tell me what to do.