Please advise

[Daisy1234]

Hi everyone. I need serious help. I feel I could have a breakdown at any moment. I have severe depression, bad anxiety and have been dissociating full time for a while.

Sorry if I have spoken about this on another thread but I can't remember if I have. Very confused. My therapist wants to continue with inner child work but I'm afraid to go there again. So what's the point of therapy then? What are we going to do - - talk about the weather?

I am barely hanging on by a thread, hour by hour. I don't think it's a good idea for me to drive 1 hour to my sister in law's today because I won't be able to focus on the road or speak properly. Too much fear. What has become of me?

Eating, personal grooming, contact with people irl, exercising daily. My therapist said to be sure I do this at a minimum daily. So robotically I do it with full on dissociation. I feel overwhelmed. I'm just staying alive, not living. I'm afraid I will be like this forever. I am so afraid of everything. Please help. I'm losing it.

P.S. I don't know how that angry face got there. I really don't recall putting it there.

 

[blacksmoke]

aint that a familiar feeling. its so hard when life is like this. at the mo i am leaking the real me. its has almost come out into the glare of the family arena.

but with a life of, "lets be fine," bllks, the "real me," whoever that is. just got submerged back in the mists of time.

Eating, personal grooming, contact with people irl, exercising daily.
gosh is that what you are supposed to do as i aint doing much of any of those. somebody asked me if i had lost weight yesterday.

i am better on my own, as i feel volatile at the mo. did make myself go to a group today which i stopped going to in feb, but no surprises that the venue was shut lmfao.

i wish i could help,

 

[Daisy1234]

Thanks for ur response blacksmoke hope u r feeling better

 

[Daisy1234]

Should I call my psychiatrist? Not sure if medication will do any good for my dissociation, maybe the anxiety though. I just left a message for my therapist. Not sure if that'll do any good either. I'm scared. Please help. I feel so out of control.

 

[soulful]

I understand severe anxiety (to the point of psychotic breakdown) The only thing that helped me was another person staying with me 24 hours (at my worst) and survive it with me. I was lucky and someone I trusted was able to do that for me. But yea, that was the only way for me: Feel it, experience it, try to stay in the body if possible and speak about it.
And never forget: It Will Pass!

These are "just" feelings that feel so powerfully real, but they are "just" feelings and will pass.

Another question to ask yourself may be: Wht is causing you anxiety atm? What are you afraid of?

 

[Mrs. Chomp]

Ask your therapist if the following could be helpful in your situation:

When you feel the fear coming, don't try to stop it. Let it come, even when it makes you cry- cry- but don't fight it. Like any emotion it WILL reach its peak. After that it will start to decrease by itself.

 

[Daisy1234]

Hi soulful and Mrs. Comp, thanks for your replies In terms of what causes my anxiety, I'm not sure. I think it's fear of being this way forever (which is very unwell I acknowledge). And when out in public that somehow I'll have a nervous breakdown (not even really sure what that is) and be left to fend for myself.

 

[Mrs. Chomp]

The thought that this might never end is a scary one indeed! One that many people share, I think, whether be it mentally or physically sick people.
Maybe try focusing on little things (its not easy to do for long periods of time, but worth a try) to evaluate if the situation is as bad as it seems. For example, if you need to go to the post office, take it step by step. Ask yourself: did I get there without incident? YES. ok, good. Did I do what I came to do? YES, ok, not so bad. Did I get home ok? YES, I did not have a nervous breakdown! Looking at the big picture the mind seems to exaggerate and label the whole day as bad or good based on one small mishap. Good luck!