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partner is struggling with my depression

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Sarahomdtif

New member
Joined
Jun 21, 2018
Messages
4
Location
England
hey so i have been with my other half since 2013 and we moved in together last october, slowly it has become apparent that he seems to resent my mental health issues. for example i spend about 200-250 a month on transport to work because i can't get the bus and i can't socialise with his friends and we can't eat in a lot of places and loads of other such restrictions and usually he is so, so great but I have noticed a few comments he has made lately wherein it's clear he is losing his patience with me and i honestly don't know what to do, i can't snap my fingers and make myself normal so what else is there?

any advice would help i feel like if i don't have his support i will crumble.
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,385
Location
basketville
Hello Sara sounds like you are in need of counselling. To be fair to your boyfriend he seems to have been supportive but maybe its wearing thin.

I reckon you will need to start making some changes and I don’t know how you will do that but I get a clear distinctive feeling going on your post that if you don’t …

So maybe he need s to see you start tackling these issues and from the sounds of it he would be supportive one thing is clear that staying like this is not an option and anyway its not living and as you get older life will get even harder so I would encourage you to dig deep and find the courage to reach out and make a few changes

Not easy but not easy to stay as you are either a rock and a hard place but take courage and make that first step
 
S

Sarahomdtif

New member
Joined
Jun 21, 2018
Messages
4
Location
England
thanks for replying, to be honest i did consider counselling but the waiting list in my area is about 8 months long. also i would like my partner to come with me as although he is supportive he has never encountered mental illness before and i think it would help to have a neutral place where i can explain what it's like and also get him to open up about how it is affecting him because i can see it's hard for him but he won't admit it. also he thinks therapy is stupid so any ideas how to convince him it's a good idea?
 
blacksmoke

blacksmoke

Well-known member
Joined
Dec 26, 2015
Messages
9,385
Location
basketville
Dunno what you can say to encourage him as males don’t tend to like talking about their feelings much which is why he most likely isn’t keen.. But if you say it would be helpful if he came along with you as you are trying to change and need his support.

Meanwhile can you maybe make a start on addressing one of the many difficulties that you have start small . small beginnings are always very helpful in the bigger picture..
 
H

hongli

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 26, 2018
Messages
170
Location
Vancouver
Hey Sara,

Have you tried talking with him about the reason for all of these "Restrictions"? Mental illness isn't something that one can simply change and I think it's important for him to know that and to help support you in your road to recovery. As mentioned above, counseling would be a good option as well, or just even finding someone who can mediate a discussion between you two.

Good luck :)
 
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