Parents with BPD?

Luci

Luci

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 15, 2019
Messages
292
Location
England
#1
I have 2 boys. 12 and 5 months. My 22 year old has Autism. My last partner was emotionally unavailable. I felt abandoned and let down as I just had a baby and I was doing such a good job of looking after the children (he has a daughter 5). I wanted to be appriciated. I didn't understand why he wasn't happy. Why he didn't want to spend time with us. I couldn't cope with his low mood. I asked him about it but he denied a problem. It was me. I needed to be 'normal'. I asked for support repeatedly. I was told I was coping fine. I was let down. I inpulsively thought if I told my support worker I felt suicidal they would have to help me..... They removed my children. I'm 3 weeks down the line.

I have no doubt my children will be returned to my care. I am an excellent dedicated mum. The baby's dad is refusing to speak to me. He let me know the relationship was over by having his solicitor tell me in court. I now feel he was up to something the whole time. My oldest son is with his paternal grandparents. They are both ok in the short term, but they need to be home.

Does anyone have any experiences of parenting with BPD? Any social services involvement?

TIA
 
A

Allyalz

Member
Joined
Mar 8, 2019
Messages
22
Location
England
#2
I have 2 children (4&5) and currently 30 weeks pregnant with 3rd. After my last suicide attempt and I ended up in hospital, social services were informed.
Do you have a cpn or support from the mental health services?

I find parenting with BPD extremely hard and I’m struggling myself.
Im sorry your having to go through this, you need support not a kick in the teeth. I’m not sure what you’d need to do to get your children home other than showing them you can provide a good home life. I hope you can better answers and I’m sorry I can’t be more help but I wanted you to know your not alone as a bpd parent.
 
Luci

Luci

Well-known member
Joined
Mar 15, 2019
Messages
292
Location
England
#3
I have a CPN at the moment but she is part if the perinatal mental health team, it was thier pyschatrist that diagnosed me. I don't have a care plan or anything yet, I was only told yesterday.

I have to undertake parenting assessments (which won't be a problem) and see an independent psychiatrist (due 12th April). The plan is then to get my oldest son rehabilitated back home ASAP because of his needs. The issue resolutions hearing is on the 24th June (so hopefully this will be when a formal order is put in place regarding both children if all parties can come to an agreement).

My children seem to be my safety zone. I can control my emotions around them because I don't want to upset or frighten them. I'm struggling now they aren't here to fill my time and feel I have no purpose. On top of the horrible emptiness of not being able to nurse my baby and put him to bed, bathe him, dress him...... I can see them for 1.5 hours a day.:cry:

I seem to have the biggest problem in relationships. I have no major issues with my mood when I am single. I am happy. I miss my ex partner and feel terribly betrayed. Despite of how unwell I was I was supporting him financially, emotionally.... I did anything he wanted. And he exploited my vulnerability. Not having an explanation from him really stings.
 

Similar threads