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    Our forum members are people, maybe like yourself, who experience mental health difficulties or who have had them at some point in their life.

Parents don't accept me.

D

dke

Active member
Joined
Aug 20, 2020
Messages
31
Location
Germany
Hello everyone, I wanted to share my story here, hoping that maybe someone will understand me.

I am from Germany but in 2017 I went to Sydney to be an Au Pair for 6 months. On my last two days, I met my boyfriend. We've talked on the phone for a year until he came to visit me in 2018 and in 2019 I finally went back to Sydney to study there for two semesters. I have been back since may this year (earlier due to COVID) and I am really struggling with my mental health. I miss him and Sydney, I distanced myself a lot from my friends here and don't really see a purpose in my life at the moment. One huge challenge is that my parents don't know much about my life as I can't talk to them. They have Turkish roots and would not be okay with me dating someone with a different nationality, let alone be with someone that is not in the same country as me. I love Sydney and the big city feeling and it is my biggest dream to live there one day, but they would never understand and accept it.

I am struggling to fall asleep, I wake up late, I eat one day a meal and spend most of my day in bed. In the past month, I maybe left the house 4-5 times. I feel very lonely and genuinely feel like I'm never going to be happy.

My parents do realize that something is wrong with me and ask me if I'm okay but I can't talk to them anyway...
I actually barely talk to them, because I am so angry to have this pressure on me on being 'good' child. It is so unfair that children in other families can make their own decisions and be their own person and others have to fight for it, while their family treats them like they are doing the worst thing ever...


At the moment I am looking for ways to make money online to be financially independent and hopefully move to Sydney with my parents as I know otherwise it's not going to work.


I would love to hear your opinion, cause I really don't know what else to do.
 
Tawny

Tawny

Well-known member
Forum Guide
Joined
Nov 10, 2019
Messages
6,135
Location
England
You do sound depressed. Have you seen the doctor about this? It is possible you need treatment and won't get better without it. Have you tried to get yourself better by exercise, fresh air, sunshine, good healthy eating and seeing friends and family? It doesn't sound like you have been able to do that.

Depression can spiral down. Starting with one thing, then another, then your thinking going down and down, you can end up in bed most of the day, loss of appetite, feeling worse and worse.

Something needs to change.

What might help now?

I understand your concerns over your parents beliefs. I don't know how severe there opinions are. I think at the very least, you need to talk to a friend, meet up with them. There must be one person who you can phone/email/speak to? Being alone with your thoughts will make everything even worse. We all need someone to talk to. I hope us online will be enough but i don't think it is the same as sitting with a friend or speaking on the phone with someone who knows you.

try to get a routine:

Get up - set alarm
breakfast
wash
go for a walk, even if you feel very tired, you will feel a bit better the more you walk.
 
D

dke

Active member
Joined
Aug 20, 2020
Messages
31
Location
Germany
Thanks a lot for your reply. It means so much to me. I will try and do my best to implement a routine.
 
P

Prycejosh1987

Well-known member
Joined
Jul 7, 2020
Messages
619
Location
UK
My parents do realize that something is wrong with me and ask me if I'm okay but I can't talk to them anyway...
I actually barely talk to them, because I am so angry to have this pressure on me on being 'good' child. It is so unfair that children in other families can make their own decisions and be their own person and others have to fight for it, while their family treats them like they are doing the worst thing ever...
You need to have open and honest communications with your parents, do what your depressive mind is telling you not to do.
 
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