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Paranoia

K

Kerryh1986

New member
Joined
Sep 17, 2017
Messages
2
So I have bpd and all my relationships have been terrible violence cheating.
Where's this time I have been with my husband around 7 years he's not like that but!!!
I keep convincing myself he's cheating
Now is this me being paranoid or is he is all I think I just can't seem to stop thinking it he doesn't go out we work at same place but when that phones in his hand I'm convinced
It's ruining my life I went ages without feeling this way he recently started lying to me about stupid things so I'm on constant suspension I can't live like this is there hope
Any ideas
 
Mayflower7

Mayflower7

Well-known member
Moderator
Joined
Jan 4, 2013
Messages
9,880
Location
England
Hi,
Welcome to the forum, have you checked his phone?
What makes you think he's cheating?
Take care
 
S

simon7319

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 25, 2015
Messages
48
What evidence do you have that he is cheating?

Sorry but with out evidence that he is then you really can't accuse him. I've done this and it ruin my relationship totally and I have regretted ever since. As all you do is drive yourself crazy, cause problems, and in a few months you lose trust and you'll never gain it back as your head will be always questioning is he.

Leave it be

Or you be saying he gone and I blame myself and feel ill is it worth it? Without proof you have nothing and don't go trying to find it as that will drive you crazy as well. Carry on its just your naughty brain been a bad to you.
 
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K

Kerryh1986

New member
Joined
Sep 17, 2017
Messages
2
Hi so it always feels like he clicks off something when I look but when I say what was that he shows me his phone he leaves his phone around no lock and says Check it but he started lying to me it was petty things but made me think if he can lie so well and once when his son fell out with us he said btw my dad cheated on you now he's a very nasty person so he is probably lying but it's there in my head I feel like he doesn't see me the same as when I was skinny he's not as sexually active he is grumpy with me but he works longer hours now to make up for my loss in earnings ask I have a lot of time off work he says he loves me same and us attracted to me I tel him I'm paranoid he says here's my phone check it if you want I dunno I feel terrible and it sounds stupid as I'm writing this but in that moment it feels like there's no doubt
 
S

simon7319

Well-known member
Joined
Apr 25, 2015
Messages
48
Very hard to leave someone as it very hurtful and I do recall this myself and swore never again and kept to this promise.

No your stupid for saying how it is at all far from it. Sounds like you both are unhappy in your relationship which can be very bad for you as a suffer BDP as your head will be in what shall I do situation. You may want to move on and yet feel you need to cling on to the person not only as your boyfriend but as you friend as well and if like me you have 0 in your life then it feeling of rejection creeps in.

From his side he may feeling that he can't move without having 20 question thrown at him you lost faith and trust and he loves you but is treading on egg shells not knowing the mood you be in when he comes in from work. The time out did my relationship no good and drove me crazy that I just went around and saw her

Sexually attraction if you taking medication you can put on the weight with certain ones (carry on taking them) and should not count as a girl you will feel that it does and I respect that men tend to see themselves as hulks anyway and body image means sod all to many.

Little things that may help

Go out together somewhere you both like, Do activity together, need not cost. Maybe get away for a hotel break or B&B for a few nights away with no phones or laptops, and start build up the trust side. You know what you both enjoy. Great when a new relationship starts and when we get on in years we tend to leave the happy times and focus on other issues in our private lives. Paranoid, maybe you are sounds like it and its how we think as BPD suffers maybe he just as worried as you are and no one has told him about what it like


I leave you will this little helpful leaflet have a read

Paranoia | Mind, the mental health charity - help for mental health problems

Get back if you need further help
 
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