Panic mode

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EstherRose94

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#1
My brain keeps shifting into panic mode and it’s really not fun. I just want it to stop. I guess I’ll talk it out with my therapist later.
 
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EstherRose94

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Mar 2, 2019
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#2
My brain keeps shifting into panic mode and it’s really not fun. I just want it to stop. I guess I’ll talk it out with my therapist later.
I am really nervous to travel and I always snap at bf when I’m nervous. I cannot be in this mindset when we travel together or else we will have a hard time understanding each other.

Maybe I will try to understand his side.

When I am very sensitive and nervous, I become extremely offended by little jokes that I’d normally laugh off. I am hyperalert to any sort of perceived threat or challenge because I’m in survival mode.

My reactions are often snappy and rude and I feel that they are justified. But I bet they have an air of hatred to them 😕

I do not hate him and never could. I hate when he says or does things that while innocent normally are not okay with my survival mode brain. For example a playful pat on the bum, a joking “you’re a weirdo”, or a comment not at all about me that non PC.

He’s a great human but he decidedly does not bite his tongue just because society would tell him to, at least not in front of me. He does when he needs to of course.

I wouldn’t want him to change and I don’t want to make him feel unloved. I can just tell my radar is out again. I am terrified that he will set my alarm bells off for no good reason and that I will react with disgust and anger and that he will be hurt and then I will feel HORRIBLE.

I wish this could be easier. I beat myself up thinking “something must be wrong with us” cause I feel that most couples don’t have these problems.

We’ve done so well recently but my anxiety has brought back a flood of memories of old arguments. I am super uncomfy. Can’t even eat.

I hope it gets back to normal soon.
 
Lunus

Lunus

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Joined
May 20, 2019
Messages
574
Location
Norfolk
#3
I am really nervous to travel and I always snap at bf when I’m nervous. I cannot be in this mindset when we travel together or else we will have a hard time understanding each other.

Maybe I will try to understand his side.

When I am very sensitive and nervous, I become extremely offended by little jokes that I’d normally laugh off. I am hyperalert to any sort of perceived threat or challenge because I’m in survival mode.

My reactions are often snappy and rude and I feel that they are justified. But I bet they have an air of hatred to them 😕

I do not hate him and never could. I hate when he says or does things that while innocent normally are not okay with my survival mode brain. For example a playful pat on the bum, a joking “you’re a weirdo”, or a comment not at all about me that non PC.

He’s a great human but he decidedly does not bite his tongue just because society would tell him to, at least not in front of me. He does when he needs to of course.

I wouldn’t want him to change and I don’t want to make him feel unloved. I can just tell my radar is out again. I am terrified that he will set my alarm bells off for no good reason and that I will react with disgust and anger and that he will be hurt and then I will feel HORRIBLE.

I wish this could be easier. I beat myself up thinking “something must be wrong with us” cause I feel that most couples don’t have these problems.

We’ve done so well recently but my anxiety has brought back a flood of memories of old arguments. I am super uncomfy. Can’t even eat.

I hope it gets back to normal soon.
The uncomfortable memories are just that, memories..they are just thoughts and as quickly as they come they will go. Be aware high anxiety keeps you in the ‘fight or flight mode’ which will keep you in high alert and looking for danger. Try to take long deep breaths, distract yourself looking at the colour of cars, or play some loud music. Most of all take long deep breaths and feel the air through your nostrils and your stomach moving up and down. Focus on your breathing and this will ground you and make your anxiety manageable.
 
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EstherRose94

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Joined
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Messages
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Location
USA
#4
Thank you Lunus! I’m feeling a bit better. Wanted a milkshake but the lady at Starbucks said they didn’t and have never made them. I know some of their stores did! I used to drink them haha. She started to like explain to me that shakes and frappes are not the same I’m like oh my goodness. Don’t mess with that lady and her expertise in dairy-based beverages. 😂
 
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