- Jul 10, 2014
I can't stand this anymore. I take offense to everything .. I don't sleep.. I cry for no reason .. I yell and punch things .. I scream.. I'm so out of control right now. These emotions are unbearable and taking over my life. I guess I shouldn't be surprised . I've been like this all my life but I was getting better. I was feeling good. Everything is going downhill now. I'm pushing my family away. My hubby said he's leaving me. . He can't handle my moods. My son thinks I hate him . I can't stand myself. I'm such a horrible person. I want it to end. I've gone my whole life like this and I've had enough. Everyone says it'll get better .. storm before the calm .. it's been 12 years since I was diagnosed and things are not better . I can't go my whole life feeling this way. I've given it 12+ years and nothing has changed other than my drug use. I don't want to live the rest of my life feeling this way. I'm going to end it. What kind of life is this?? Living in pain all the time.. I don't want to live like this. I've tried making positive changes like quitting drugs and alcohol. I'm taking my meds. I'm doing everything I can and nothing works . I'm done. I can't do this anymore..