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On a low after a 'high' week - advice?

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dewey

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1,025
Yeah so I've been running around like crazy all week on an intense high, doing things almost manically, even though depressed inside. Now suddenly feeling terrible and inadequate, a low low low.
Any advice as to how I can get out this slump?
 
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dewey

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1,025
I'm feeling the worthlessness i shouldn't be feeling. I'm trying to be my own best friend. I'm trying to reason with myself. I'm trying to tell myself that there are good things about me, and yeah I know there, but I just can't see them right now. That's depression.

Same time as trying to be a friend to me, I just feel sad. And not good enough. That feeling is sinking deep into the heart of me.

I'd love to be able to put this into words somehow, or create something out of it, so it's not wasted. But I just can't. I want to write this almost for myself, so I know I can look it and see that I'm learning to be kinder to myself.

I'm focussing on me, or trying to. I'm trying to make this about me and no one else and just accepting that I feel depressed. But it's not an 'I want to kill myself' sort of depression. More a depression that says, I know this feeling, and I'm going to live through it. It's me turning around to my depression and saying "I know you old friend, and I'm just going to let you sit here with me, until you decide to leave".

I'm also experiencing the beauty of depression, that even though it is an ugly, terrible thing, that has destroyed me countless times, now I can see it as something that allows me to penetrate through to the depth of myself. To experience a deeper emotion, so I am in touch with who I really am, the things I've lived through, the pain I've felt. So it's not a bad thing. It brings me in touch with me.

The lowest low of emotion. A buzz on the right side of my brain, a change of mental state, like I'm drunk off the serotonin deficit. In pain but it doesn't have to be bad.
 
tragicpink

tragicpink

Well-known member
Joined
Nov 22, 2018
Messages
46
Location
Canada
Hey, I think i know exactly what you're talking about. I know all about the highs and lows, trust me. Honestly one piece of advice that genuinely works is meditation. Have you ever tried it? for years and years I said i'd never do it but i started to and it's pretty impactful. Otherwise do you have any create interests? I spend a lot of my time writing or drawing (even if I'm really not good at it). It's a good release of thoughts and emotions.
 
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dewey

Well-known member
Joined
Jan 16, 2019
Messages
1,025
Hey, I think i know exactly what you're talking about. I know all about the highs and lows, trust me. Honestly one piece of advice that genuinely works is meditation. Have you ever tried it? for years and years I said i'd never do it but i started to and it's pretty impactful. Otherwise do you have any create interests? I spend a lot of my time writing or drawing (even if I'm really not good at it). It's a good release of thoughts and emotions.
Thanks for your reply.
I haven't really tried meditation when feeling depressed.
I'm a bit wary of meditation to be honest, it can make me feel strange.
Yes, I write, it can help me understand better what is going on...
 
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