Old friends don't talk to me. Did I ruin something?

mixtape02

mixtape02

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Dec 23, 2014
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I go off and on wanting to use Facebook and not use it. I know it's a simple fix to quit looking at it and then I won't become depressed by having my comment ignored while they give all their other friends' comments "likes." Or seeing an old friend reminisce with another but ignore my message, which is lingering there unanswered, is depressing too.

So I try to log out and ignore it, but that last thing fucked it all up. I was feeling pretty optimistic and decided to add this old long time friend once again recently after a year. It drew attention because I had a falling out with a mutual so she acted happy to hear from me and spammed me with likes. I even drove far to see her. I felt like I fucked it up by still drinking or by not being what she expected. Not fun enough? Cool enough? And I know that she used to be the type to gossip when people asked questions about other people or something so I'm paranoid.

Some other stuff happened when I was there that anyone would be upset about and maybe take as a bad omen. But I don't know if she's irrational and would blame me for it.

Anyway, I feel like all my optimism--trying to get in shape so that I can live longer--is for naught because why would I want to live longer for this bullshit?
 
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B

BrianHorlicks

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I noticed that with school friends I found on facebook,
I got a bit excited when I found people who I have seen for years,
Because they had moved away,
And I'd lost contact with them,
Then found out,
That I'd really have nothing to say to them.
Or,
What i posted got ignored,
Yet their posts would show up,
Or other peoples got liked.

Friends are the hardest things,
It's a balancing act,
That you can never control.

I think that you should just move on.
Look forward to new ventures,
Make new friends;
Don't let this get you down.
 
Kerome

Kerome

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I recently had a whole batch of school reunions, and these kinds of things came up for me as well. I think some friends when they drift apart don't have the same recognition when you meet again, their lives have moved on. Other friends really greet you like long lost buddies, and you really end up getting on well and maybe a contact is rekindled.

But I don't think Facebook is such a great medium for renewing friendships, just because you can't see body language or facial expression. Sometimes there is no substitute for a face to face meeting. Often, in fact. I admire what my father does, he keeps contact with his friends by just arranging regular meet ups or lunches, there are about three or four and he regularly makes an appointment with them.
 
Unique1

Unique1

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Hiya.

I deactivated my facebook some months ago now, and felt better for it :)
It was doing me no good at all.
I realise for some it is useful. For me not..
Wish you well.
Unique1 xx
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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what you feel makes sense....!

it's ok

it really is ok ....XX
 
mixtape02

mixtape02

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Messages
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I noticed that with school friends I found on facebook,
I got a bit excited when I found people who I have seen for years,
Because they had moved away,
And I'd lost contact with them,
Then found out,
That I'd really have nothing to say to them.
Or,
What i posted got ignored,
Yet their posts would show up,
Or other peoples got liked.

Friends are the hardest things,
It's a balancing act,
That you can never control.

I think that you should just move on.
Look forward to new ventures,
Make new friends;
Don't let this get you down.
I've also added people I was excited to find then had nothing to say. If I sent a message saying hey to see if they had the decency to reply, it was ignored. I would just ignore the request of I didn't want to reply or talk to the person!

But yeah, you're right. There are the appropriate friends out there. For everyone.
 
mixtape02

mixtape02

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Dec 23, 2014
Messages
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I recently had a whole batch of school reunions, and these kinds of things came up for me as well. I think some friends when they drift apart don't have the same recognition when you meet again, their lives have moved on. Other friends really greet you like long lost buddies, and you really end up getting on well and maybe a contact is rekindled.

But I don't think Facebook is such a great medium for renewing friendships, just because you can't see body language or facial expression. Sometimes there is no substitute for a face to face meeting. Often, in fact. I admire what my father does, he keeps contact with his friends by just arranging regular meet ups or lunches, there are about three or four and he regularly makes an appointment with them.
That's true that you can't see facial expressions so it's not really a reliable socializing method, but my impression is that people my age have been using the internet since like 2000. Facebook since around 2008 maybe. We all know proper Facebook etiquette--ignoring people (especially several times) is almost a sure sign you've done something to deserve it. :/
 
mixtape02

mixtape02

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Messages
28
Hiya.

I deactivated my facebook some months ago now, and felt better for it :)
It was doing me no good at all.
I realise for some it is useful. For me not..
Wish you well.
Unique1 xx
I definitely encourage anyone who feels depressed by Facebook to deactivate it too, or put it out of sight out of mind. I think I just want to keep it to practice not being upset by it anymore while still using it about once a day.
 
Unique1

Unique1

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I definitely encourage anyone who feels depressed by Facebook to deactivate it too, or put it out of sight out of mind. I think I just want to keep it to practice not being upset by it anymore while still using it about once a day.
:) yes.

Don't blame yourself for others. People can be rude unfortunately
X
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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sometimes it's best to give yourself to everything else....

xxoo
 
dubblemonkey

dubblemonkey

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Messages
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Location
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there are many things that hurt

...it does not please me that you are in pain...

...I am here if you want to unload...

I understand things that I wish I did not....

I will listen
 
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