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Oh God I'm so depressed

P

Puggie

Former member
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Aug 19, 2021
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39
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Australia
Trigger warning: a song about suicide.

Oh God I'm so depressed. I haven't gotten out of bed at all today and it's 8pm. I have had 2 glasses of water but apart from that I'm not eating or drinking (or showering or cleaning my teeth). I have fed my Pug but that's all I could do today. I'm just so sad. And I have a really sad song in my head (earworm). "She's Not Dead" by Suede. The song is about a double suicide. It's a beautiful song, just very sad. I'm not having suicidal thoughts though. That's the thing: I rarely have suicidal thoughts; I just feel extremely and devastatingly and overwhelmingly depressed. All of the time. For years. It never goes away. And on top of that I can't have relationships with people. I just feel so depressed and so lonely and so sad.

That's all I can say. I can't even write anymore like I used to. I can barely express myself. I find it hard to keep up with simple conversations online. I just don't have the energy or the cognitive ability.


In the car he couldn't afford
They found his made-up name
On her ankle chain


Apparently Kurt Cobain liked this song. Well you can't get anymore fucking depressing than that.
 
mischief

mischief

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Hi @Puggie

Are you receiving any assistance with managing your depression?
 
P

Puggie

Former member
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Aug 19, 2021
Messages
39
Location
Australia
Hi @Puggie

Are you receiving any assistance with managing your depression?
Hi mischief, I'm very sorry but I don't have the energy to have this conversation. I'm sorry, I don't mean to sound rude. All I can say is: I have some but it isn't enough.
 
P

Puggie

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Aug 19, 2021
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Australia
I'm very sorry but I'm just not up to having this conversation right now. It's making me irritable. I came here to connect with my peers.
 
S

SadRainbow

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Aug 5, 2021
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I'm sorry you're so sad. I'm really sad too. I can't bear to listen to sad songs now - they make me cry and cry and cry... I used to enjoy Suede in my teens/early 20s. I particularly listened to 'He's Gone' when I was really down.

I think I would still be in bed now if it wasn't for the fact that I'd feel guilty about my little girl. Plus her grandmother is visiting soon.

I hope somehow you feel better soon.
 
S

SadRainbow

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By the way I've noticed I feel a lot worse when I haven't been eating so now I force myself to eat. It does help a bit.
 
P

Puggie

Former member
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Aug 19, 2021
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Australia
Hi SadRainbow, I loved Suede too. Still do. Thanks very much for your reply ❤
 
B

Bod

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Pretty Good
Hi Puggie, I am sorry to hear you are feeling so depressed as it can be so psysically mentally and emotionally draining on our minds and body sadly and it totally knocks us for six. Some people have depression because of a loss of a loved one or loss of a job or even through trauma in our lives and the list goes on, so we have to try and get some sort of help from a GP or counsellor/therapist to help guide us through those bad times in our lives. With me my depression and anxiety came on because of all the trauma I had bottled up over the years so I was like a ticking time bomb but then I hit my rock bottom and got all the help I needed and it hurt me so hard to go through it all but I came out the other side.
 
P

Puggie

Former member
Joined
Aug 19, 2021
Messages
39
Location
Australia
I'm sorry you're so sad. I'm really sad too. I can't bear to listen to sad songs now - they make me cry and cry and cry... I used to enjoy Suede in my teens/early 20s. I particularly listened to 'He's Gone' when I was really down.

I think I would still be in bed now if it wasn't for the fact that I'd feel guilty about my little girl. Plus her grandmother is visiting soon.

I hope somehow you feel better soon.
Hi SadRainbow, I'm not very good at talking right now. I just wanted to say... I have a big interest in 90's indie rock music (preferably British). I used to go to clubs during the Shoegaze era. They were fun exciting times (in my 20's) but always coloured by my depression. Except I didn't even know I had depression then. I just thought it was normal.
 
S

SadRainbow

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Aug 5, 2021
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2,657
Location
Norfolk
Hi SadRainbow, I'm not very good at talking right now. I just wanted to say... I have a big interest in 90's indie rock music (preferably British). I used to go to clubs during the Shoegaze era. They were fun exciting times (in my 20's) but always coloured by my depression. Except I didn't even know I had depression then. I just thought it was normal.
I was a teenager in the 90s. I didn't like most of the music around then (more of an 80s fan) but I did like some of the indie bands, particularly Pulp. My mental health wasn't in great shape at the time either so a lot of the music now reminds me of painful memories unfortunately.
 
T

turnitoffandonagain_again

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May 27, 2020
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1,260
Location
UK
I don't have anything helpful to say, but the thread title really jumped out at me, because decades ago I found myself saying/thinking those words to my self so frequently that I started mentally abbreviating it to OGIsd. Was just thinking it again earlier today.
 

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