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OCD obsession with my wife's face or body, please help!!



New member
Dec 9, 2019
Seattle, WA

This has been a bit of a recurring problem and I am seeking professional help but also looking for some help here.

When I met my wife, we dated for a year (long-distance) and got married. She felt perfect for me at the time. We shared common values, goals, interests, and I found her very very beautiful.
After a little while, I thought she was a little bit skinny (breasts smaller than A cup) and that really really bothered me. I found it difficult to look at her in a bathrob because something feels missing. I'm obsessively worried that something is not right with her and it sort of gave me a headache, prevented me from sleeping etc. I also obsessively looked at other women's breast shapes and frequently compared.
The funny thing is this obsession wasn't always there. For some reasons, there are certain unknown triggers that I couldn't identify.
She gained a bit of weight (from 100 pounds to 110) and her breasts got a bit fuller to an A cup. But she it also showed on her face and her face doesn't look as good as before.
Unfortunately my obsession and focus has shifted to her face. It comes and goes periodically. Sometimes the shape just doesn't look that good to me and I cannot get over it. I notice the better facial shape on other women, ruminate on it, and it makes me very depressed.
I cannot talk to her about it because I don't want her to think that there is something wrong with her. I think the problem really lies in my mind.
Again, this obsession with face seems to be periodic and happens once every two months or so for no apparent reason. It's hard to shift my attention away from it.
If I don't obsess with her face, I probably would worry about something else for example something at work. My brain always seem to latch onto something.

The relationship prior to my marriage broke down because, again, I found my girlfriend initially attractively but found her face less attractive over time when compared with some other girls. It made me uncomfortable and I wanted to find someone prettier. I found my current wife who is prettier but still finds some problems.

I know people age and lose their beauty over time. I am very worried that my perfectionist tendencies would destroy my chances of long term relationships.

Prior to my marriage, about 5-6 years ago, I had some obsessive thoughts over my penis size. It is a bit small when soft and when hard is a bit over 4 inches. It drove me nuts and I repetitively measured it over and over again.

Not sure if it helps but I am a programmer, hobby mathematician, and musician. I think my obsessive personality helped me do well in programming and math because I can usually become obsessed about finding the right answer, fixing the right bug in the software etc. So obsessed that it is a bit difficult to stop.

Sorry to make this so long. Thanks for reading and hope someone can help please.


Dec 8, 2019
Understand you and fee your pain🙄. One Time į had terrible feel, į am not love my husband, but know is not true, avoid him, look at him, tuch him. Į leave him and go to hospital with treatment. AL sypmtoms gone and we meet again.